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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 14:51 
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Hibernating Druid

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Your willy emerges from your abdomen when aroused?

You Isle of Man folk are weird.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:15 
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Pricing a house for an elderly rich couple, over £1.7m currently for a three-bedroom house. Amaze.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:24 
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Gogmagog

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Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:31 
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MaliA wrote:
Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?


Yeah, build cost plus prelims, overheads and profit. So add to that the land cost, plus consultants fees etc. Expensive three bedroom house. Amongst other special shit they've asked for, they want a koi carp pond outside that you can see from inside the house.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:32 
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AtrocityExhibition wrote:
Just finished getting a 90 minute massage off Mrs AE (she's practising for her NVQ course that she's doing at college, the practical exam is coming up soon where she gets assessed by some sort of independent assessy person).

Depressingly, there were no 'extras'.

Then she'll fail, won't she?

AtrocityExhibition wrote:
Personally I find it highly unlikely that any bloke could have his abdomen massaged by an attractive lass and not get a hard-on, so I am not thrilled at the prospect of her massaging men.

I hate massages. Hate them. Get your hands off me. UGH.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:35 
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flis wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?


Yeah, build cost plus prelims, overheads and profit. So add to that the land cost, plus consultants fees etc. Expensive three bedroom house. Amongst other special shit they've asked for, they want a koi carp pond outside that you can see from inside the house.


Whoah, wait - that's just the build cost? Not even the land?! Holy fuck!

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:35 
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baron of techno

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flis wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?


Yeah, build cost plus prelims, overheads and profit. So add to that the land cost, plus consultants fees etc. Expensive three bedroom house. Amongst other special shit they've asked for, they want a koi carp pond outside that you can see from inside the house.


Ooh, so they'll be specifying some sort of transparent medium in a frame set in the wall of the house? That is fancy-pants!


I want a floating duck island.

I'm borrowing my dad's tractor to "landscape" my garden shortly. Should be fun.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:35 
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Craster wrote:
flis wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?


Yeah, build cost plus prelims, overheads and profit. So add to that the land cost, plus consultants fees etc. Expensive three bedroom house. Amongst other special shit they've asked for, they want a koi carp pond outside that you can see from inside the house.


Whoah, wait - that's just the build cost? Not even the land?! Holy fuck!

No, I think the land is included (I was wondering that, too). Right?

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:36 
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Gogmagog

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For £1.7MM, I want a hollowed out volcano.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:37 
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Happy birthday DavPaz! I don't get what that montage of girls that Perkies posted is about?


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:37 
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baron of techno

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Gilly wrote:
Happy birthday DavPaz! I don't get what that montage of girls that Perkies posted is about?


:this: Y :this:


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:37 
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Bouncing Hedgehog

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MaliA wrote:
For £1.7MM, I want a hollowed out volcano.

I will build you a Tracy Island for half that.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:38 
SupaMod
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Gilly wrote:
Happy birthday DavPaz! I don't get what that montage of girls that Perkies posted is about?

"Some people get fatter"

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:38 
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Comfortably Dumb

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kalmar wrote:
flis wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?


Yeah, build cost plus prelims, overheads and profit. So add to that the land cost, plus consultants fees etc. Expensive three bedroom house. Amongst other special shit they've asked for, they want a koi carp pond outside that you can see from inside the house.


Ooh, so they'll be specifying some sort of transparent medium in a frame set in the wall of the house? That is fancy-pants!


Heh, that was my first thought too. Not geeky enough though - needs webcams/CCTV.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:40 
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baron of techno

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devilman wrote:
kalmar wrote:
flis wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?


Yeah, build cost plus prelims, overheads and profit. So add to that the land cost, plus consultants fees etc. Expensive three bedroom house. Amongst other special shit they've asked for, they want a koi carp pond outside that you can see from inside the house.


Ooh, so they'll be specifying some sort of transparent medium in a frame set in the wall of the house? That is fancy-pants!


Heh, that was my first thought too. Not geeky enough though - needs webcams/CCTV.


OK, underwater fish-cams connected to a 50" plasma which also serves as a coffee table? I can has consultancy fee now.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:41 
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Having said that, when I one day build myself a house it will be so tricked out it's unreal. Living room not big enough for a party? No problem, we'll just MOVE THE WALLS to make it bigger. Because that's the future, bitches.

I really, really hate the fact that we're still building essentially the same houses we were building 150 years ago.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:41 
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Grim... wrote:

AtrocityExhibition wrote:
Personally I find it highly unlikely that any bloke could have his abdomen massaged by an attractive lass and not get a hard-on, so I am not thrilled at the prospect of her massaging men.

I hate massages. Hate them. Get your hands off me. UGH.

:( :'(

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:43 
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Grim... wrote:
Craster wrote:
flis wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Is that like £1.7MM of bricks and shit like that?


Yeah, build cost plus prelims, overheads and profit. So add to that the land cost, plus consultants fees etc. Expensive three bedroom house. Amongst other special shit they've asked for, they want a koi carp pond outside that you can see from inside the house.


Whoah, wait - that's just the build cost? Not even the land?! Holy fuck!

No, I think the land is included (I was wondering that, too). Right?


No, no land. We price purely the build cost. The M&E (mechanical & electrical) alone is coming in at over £300k. There be some sexy shiny lights... And a lift.

@kalmar - Hah :D Piss off!

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:43 
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Gogmagog

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Craster wrote:
Having said that, when I one day build myself a house it will be so tricked out it's unreal. Living room not big enough for a party? No problem, we'll just MOVE THE WALLS to make it bigger. Because that's the future, bitches.

I really, really hate the fact that we're still building essentially the same houses we were building 150 years ago.



The parents of an ex of mine lived in a house built to her father's specifications. Some bits were great, others, not so much.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:43 
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flis wrote:
No, no land. We price purely the build cost.

Ker-ist.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:44 
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Grim... wrote:
Gilly wrote:
Happy birthday DavPaz! I don't get what that montage of girls that Perkies posted is about?

"Some people get fatter"


Basically, yeah. Part of it is how sudden it is... in the first picture, she is probably 15 or 16 on the left, and 18 or 19 on the right.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:44 
SupaMod
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Goddess Jasmine wrote:
Grim... wrote:

AtrocityExhibition wrote:
Personally I find it highly unlikely that any bloke could have his abdomen massaged by an attractive lass and not get a hard-on, so I am not thrilled at the prospect of her massaging men.

I hate massages. Hate them. Get your hands off me. UGH.

:( :'(

:shrug:

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:45 
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Craster wrote:
Having said that, when I one day build myself a house it will be so tricked out it's unreal. Living room not big enough for a party? No problem, we'll just MOVE THE WALLS to make it bigger. Because that's the future, bitches.


Nope, Jay Kay did that YEARS AGO.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:45 
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Gogmagog

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I don't like the idea of paying women to touch me.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:47 
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baron of techno

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Image


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:49 
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If I had the money to build a house I would recreate the mansion from Resident Evil.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:51 
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TheVision wrote:
If I had the money to build a house I would recreate the mansion from Resident Evil.



Cluedo mansion, natch.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:52 
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I'd want at least one secret room accessible through a revolving bookcase.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:53 
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baron of techno

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I'd want an observatory.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:55 
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Kern wrote:
I'd want at least one secret room accessible through a revolving bookcase.


I want rooms that are only accessible by ascending to a higher plane of existance.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 15:59 
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baron of techno

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Craster wrote:
Kern wrote:
I'd want at least one secret room accessible through a revolving bookcase.


I want rooms that are only accessible by ascending to a higher plane of existance.


2001: A Craster Odyssey.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 16:04 
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Gogmagog

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Craster wrote:
Kern wrote:
I'd want at least one secret room accessible through a revolving bookcase.


I want rooms that are only accessible by ascending to a higher plane of existance.


Buy a first floor flat then.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 16:09 
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Sitting balls-back folder

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My Grand Designs house goes downwards. I've got a really quite terrifying number of engineering and construction details ironed out in my head already.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 16:17 
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Craster wrote:
Kern wrote:
I'd want at least one secret room accessible through a revolving bookcase.


I want rooms that are only accessible by ascending to a higher plane of existance.


Yeah, but you'd finally get there and just find Wesley Crusher looking all smug.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 16:18 
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It's fine. He'd quickly fall foul of one of the many layers of mechanical security built into the building. In particular, the wesley crusher.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 16:32 
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TheVision wrote:
If I had the money to build a house I would recreate the mansion from Resident Evil.

I think it'd be inconvenient to have to assemble a pendant from pieces depicting an eagle, a hare, and a lion every time you wanted to go to the bathroom.


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 16:55 
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kalmar wrote:
Image

Kris Kuksi!

Posted about him in that arty farty thread a while back.

Awesome.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 17:07 
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Sleepyhead

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It's no Burt-Tank

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 17:22 
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Is that the new Popemobile?


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 17:36 
SupaMod
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Curiosity wrote:
Craster wrote:
Kern wrote:
I'd want at least one secret room accessible through a revolving bookcase.

I want rooms that are only accessible by ascending to a higher plane of existance.

Yeah, but you'd finally get there and just find Wesley Crusher looking all smug.

SPOILZ

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 20:49 
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Worst

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MaliA wrote:
I don't like the idea of paying women to touch me.

I can't imagine women touching me without financial transaction taking place.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 20:57 
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throughsilver wrote:
MaliA wrote:
I don't like the idea of paying women to touch me.

I can't imagine women touching me without financial transaction taking place.

You still doing that stripper gig, bud?


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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 21:27 
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Worst

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DavPaz wrote:
throughsilver wrote:
MaliA wrote:
I don't like the idea of paying women to touch me.

I can't imagine women touching me without financial transaction taking place.

You still doing that stripper gig, bud?

That's strictly 'look but don't touch' :(

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 21:28 
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I heard he stops grinding if you don't spent a penny in his slot.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 22:02 
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When I was a kid my humbrol painted yank platoon faced off against Jerry in many a skirmish on my battleboard. They were always the cast from Kelly's Heroes. That church-tank would have so been awesome on that battleboard. Look out Donald Sutherland!

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 23:57 
SupaMod
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Worst. Upskirt. Attempt. Ever.

Attachment:
IMG_0303.JPG


I need a camera that boots faster.


You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Mon Mar 19, 2012 23:59 
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Curiosity wrote:
Yeah, but you'd finally get there and just find Wesley Crusher looking all smug.

Did you not see the cut scenes from Nemesis? Wesley decends to become an engineering lacky on Riker's new ship. So much for all that 'higher plane' bullshit.

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 0:04 
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Grim... wrote:
Worst. Upskirt. Attempt. Ever.

I need a camera that boots faster.


Lame.

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 Post subject: Re: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 0:10 
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Grim... wrote:
Worst. Upskirt. Attempt. Ever.

I need a camera that boots faster.


Is that car really big or is she small?

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 Post subject: Re: Bits and Bobs 33
PostPosted: Tue Mar 20, 2012 0:10 
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Hello Hello Hello

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Is he attempting to get upskirt shots of his own wife?

Fair play to be honest, can't knock it.


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