Be Excellent To Each Other

For those that remain, the party's in here.

Is it alright if I party hard tomorrow night? I'm off to Newcastle tonight for a chum's birthday. Mandatory.

Woooo! Parrrr-teeee! Woooo!



* downs mug of home-made punch, eats badly cooked barbecue, downs more punch, is sick, falls over and goes to sleep *

It doesn't work at work...

Looks like I'll be partying on my own then.

If everyone is away, who is on mod duties?

I nominate myself to be in charge. If you wish to post this weekend, please paypal £2 to (lindabarker - ed)@hotmail.com.

I'll let you post for £1.99.

I didn't think online cottaging would work as well as this.

It's just a video, you don't need it for partying. In fact, the partying can be pretty much anything you want it to be. I'm sat here hungover to fuck, quietly having a little surf before I feel able to manage a baked potato without heaving. But I'm doing so with my knob out, which makes it a party.

*gets knob out*

*goes stair surfing*

This is a horrible party and I've had enough. Everyone go home now please.

*drinks someone elses can until cigarette end touches lip*

*hurls in Crasters handbag*

*moonwalks across pile of cardigans*

I really shouldn't be here but Ramsea is away and I'm so lonely. Oh I really shouldn't have a drink, I lose all my inhibitions after a glass of wine.

I may have said too much....

I've just been crying on the stairs for a good 20 minutes and no one came to comfort me..

Some party this is!

* Drunkenly says something utterly inappropriate to flis, before bursting into tears, spilling wine over the carpet and then locking himself in the toilet *

You aren't partying hard enough.

*turns up in a Superman costume*
The fuck? They told me it was fancy dress!

Sorry, I can't hear you. I'm currently standing naked on the garage roof wearing nothing but my beer hat and a smile.

*Swims with Barrymore*
*Drives swimming pool into TV*

*gets steadily drunk in the corner while waiting for a vaguely familiar song to come on before giving up and sloping off home early*

Hey! Are you coming to Newcastle with me tonight?

Christ! YOU HAD TO GO THERE!

This is getting out of hand.

Party food: What party food is everyone having?

I just had a jacket potato with tuna mayonnaise and next I'm having chocolate bread.

Some Tic-Tacs and a glass of water.

My body is a temple.

Cheese and pineapple on cocktail sticks and crisps of an indeterminate flavour.

I've never understood the need for those.

Primula cheese on ritz crackers here

The cocktail stick ? , its to stop Zardoz using other things to keep the pineapple off the floor.

Are you going to put the Demis Roussos LP on?

Oh, I made biscuits yesterday.


They don't all say Andrew Neil, mind.

Shame. I'd like an Andrew Neil biscuit.

You can have that one - it's still available. We ate the ones that said 'Fuck yeah biscuit win', though. There is also a Land Shark biscuit and several that have my name on them, and Monkey ones, too.

See, baking. We can have a party with baking, too.

The biscuits are quite yummy, as it happens.

964 Bananas.

More bananas could have been scored by icing an unconvincing toupee onto the top of the biscuits.

Thanks Mimi, that's the bestest thing I've seen all day.

Just got up?

No, just at work...and there is definitely nothing bestest to see there.

My drunkeness is embarrassing now, in light of the cool biscuits......Darn.

More wine, anyone?

*Avoids eye contact with Squirt*

Gilly, there's whiskey in the globe. Pineapple and cheese onastick?

Was making sure I had something to eat before partying. Had sausages and mustard mash with homemade onion gravy. My nephew (Cookie197) is here as well and said the gravy 'wasn't that great but he'd eat it anyway' usually he loves my cooking so I'll let him off. It might have been the wine I used
So now to the drink! *opens bottle of wine*

Yeah, I'm with Dan. You know Dan, yeah? I'm with him. He hasn't arrived yet. He said he was coming later. I brought a bottle ofbeer. I'll wait for him in the kitchen.

Who is using the toilet? They've been in there for about 20 minutes. Have they passed out? We're all waiting to go, out here!

I want chocolate bread.

Your face is chocolate bread

Get back here Craster!

Haaahahah! Well you went to the wrong party and we're having *way* more fun here with....er....a blocked toilet and half a box of warm wine. Yeah!

I totally told him.

LET'S PLAY TWISTER!

Ok! *strips*

You get your kit off and I'll get the vegetable oil!!

Wait, what?