Be Excellent To Each Other

The worst thing about the bank note thing? Apparently the £50 note changed in 2011 and I didn't know.

<cries into bank account>

I've probably had 5 £50 notes in total in the last 15 years.

The recruitment consultant that got me my current job just called me up to ask why I was leaving, and then offer me a similar role at a different company slightly nearer to home for more money.

Thing is, I work in printing solutions support on a mid-twenties salary, and I've recently accepted a new role as a field engineer for an Apple Reseller on a low-twenties salary and this job she just told me about was slightly-more-interesting-printing-solutions support for high-twenties money. And I turned her down. I told her I'd grown bored of working in the print industry and wanted a new challenge.

I must be fucking crazy, right? I've just accepted a three grand pay cut and turned down a two grand pay rise.

Also, apparently the current fiver is Elizabeth Fry

Yeah, that surprised me a bit too.

<cries at london prices>

Not at all, think of job satisfaction..

I'd do what you did in a shot, but then I don't have £25K debts.

<cries at wedding prices>

In a cafe in small town Mississippi last year I was showing a young family some English money. The mother pointed to the picture of the Queen on the note, and her kids immediately recognised her. Turning the note over, the mother asked who the bearded guy was.
'Charles Darwin' I replied. She quickly thrust the note back to me without letting the kids get a decent glimpse at the note. It was then I noticed that she was wearing a t-shirt bearing the name of a local evangelical church.

But the 2k payrise id about £125 a month that will go.

By then the fiver will be so worthless any one with a picture of Charlie on them will usually see service on camping trips when the facilities are under-equipped.

Well, yes, quite. But I'm giving National Debtline another call tonight - I think I've found my solution to that problem but just want to go over it with them before taking any action.

You don't have to put on the red light.

I have an outfit you can borrow

That's really not true. In the tools I use on Oracle databases it knows and reports the number of rows you've impacted before you rollback or commit.

Reckon you'll get good odds on the next royal child's name being Bungle or Zippy.

Plebs is better than I thought it would be.

I saw one and enjoyed it. It had danny dyer in it. Then i forgot about it.

I see its got the cute chubby ginger chick from the Inbetweeners film; is she hot in this?

Yes.

There is a moth in my bedroom the size of a fucking eagle and its really starting to get on my tits. Plus I've emptied half a can of deodorant trying to freeze dry the cunt so the room smells like a brothel.

Play the long game. Turn the lights out and it will settle. In the morning it will be attracted to the brightest light so it will fly into the sun and die. Victory will be assured!

They are getting quick at this - eztv.it was blocked for me this morning - googled eztv + proxy clicked on the first link and i'm on the page.

Hey, this is a foolproof scheme to provide fun and profit. Don't worry, I'll be wearing 3 condoms simultaneously each time for this endeavour. I don't want it making my debts even worse!



I'm 50% intrigued, 50% afraid.

Cat allergy progress

No, MrsA, I am pleased ebcause we can now visit friends with cats again, not "we can get a cat". Or a dog. Or any animal. Now stop crying. I'll tell you about life's broken dreams and ambitions. We're not the Waltons, we're more Breaking Bad. Now load the fucking dishwasher. Fuck's sake. I'm going to the pub.

Be afraid.

Be very afraid.

it is the image that will pop into your head right at the wrong moment.

I admire you, Mali. You're like the shining example of the man I wish I were, as opposed to the one I am, constantly trampled underfoot by the whims of the womenfolk.

My girlfriend is being given two kittens by a friend of hers. She asked for my opinion as to whether we should accept them... BUT IT IS A TRAP. I know already that my opinion matters not.

I wanted to take my daughter to Legoland. I've wanted to go to Legoland since I was 6 years old (they only had one in Denmark back then, so my parents refused). But everyone says "she'd rather go to Gulliver's Land". So I ask her, do you want daddy to take you to awesome Legoland or rubbish Gulliver's Land? She replies: "Gulliver's Land! Gulliver's Land!".

My opinion counts for nothing.

I want a kitten.

And I want to go to Legoland.

BUT WE DON'T ALWAYS GET THE THINGS WE WANT, DO WE???

You're mean.

'Gullier's Land' is probably more fun for infants than its sister park, 'Modest Proposal World'

Hello I am here, and all offended now

If we did, my dream last night about NCIS: Supernatural, starrig Gary Busey, would be a huge hit.

MrsA has gone to Sheffield (but not int he coronation Street sense) to go and do conference with her Information Sciences people and then she is going to Leeds to do shopping or somtheing like that. "Hurrah!" I thought to myself. Then realised we don't own a microwave and I have no idea how the new oven works. now I wish we'd bought that Webebr BBQ for £70 last night. I'll have to go for a curry, then.

I might be going to Legoland in 3 weeks for a couple of days. Not too bothered about it.

I went to Legoland in Denmark when I was about 8, I think. It was excellent. Didn't you have a cat before, Zio? And not get on with it?

Don't make the same mistake I did. I went to Legoland when I was younger, but completely forgot my shoes and socks.

It shit on my computer. We nearly had cat caserole for dinner the next day.

I've warned the incumbent missus that cat shitting accidents will no longer be tolerated.

The only way of that not happening is if you don't have a cat.

The boy's right, y'know. And cat hair on the worksurfaces in the kitchen. Clawed furniture. it won't be long until you're selling yourself on the streets for another feather on a fishing rod.

Or if you do don't get Sean Connery to look after it.

My cat never shat where it shouldn't. Nor did it claw furniture. It did develop a tendancy to piss where it shouldn't.

Heh.

I'm trying to scare the lad.

@ cras

Mrs C's cat shat on her bed the night of our first date; make of that what you will. The missus to be was none too pleased about it; he got a good clip round the ear.

Cats? They're OK I guess, but they're no dogs. Er.

Cavey brings the science

Aw shucks man, who needs Gaywood anyway eh?
Must admit, that was pretty shite even by my standards, I'll fetch my coat.

I've taught my dogs to hi5.

I thought it would be kinda nifty to have a red front tyre on my bike and a blue rear tyre, so when people catch up and overtake it'd be like a Doppler shift. I then realised people would just ask why I had one red and blue tyre. Idiots, the lot of them.

Yeah, but have you taught them to...


I've said too much.