Bits And Bobs 38

chinnyhill10 · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 15695

MaliA wrote:

Google+ just suggested a Cosplay community for me. Fuck you, googleplus.

Every day of your life is Cosplay, as well you know.

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 13:44

I wish some websites would function with IE8. Windowed, the grauniad goes really strange.

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 13:46

chinnyhill10 wrote:

MaliA wrote:

Google+ just suggested a Cosplay community for me. Fuck you, googleplus.

Every day of your life is Cosplay, as well you know.

Heh. Today it is pinstriped suit, pink shirt with some smart cuff links and black brogues. I am considering ditching the shoes for cowboy boots, though, as the shoelaces are knackered. Being well dressed for tonight is important.

chinnyhill10 · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 15695

MaliA wrote:

Heh. Today it is pinstriped suit, pink shirt with some smart cuff links and black brogues. I am considering ditching the shoes for cowboy boots, though, as the shoelaces are knackered. Being well dressed for tonight is important.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

God in heaven. I think I might stop reading the Graun now.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree ... nial-relic

Quote:

What other result could conceivably be expected if the future of the islands is put in the hands of the tiny British settler population, most of whom weren't born there but are subsidised to the tune of £44,856 a head to keep them in the Rhodesian retro style to which they are accustomed?

Rhodesian? WTF? Yes, the Falklanders are all racist because... they're white?

Even for milne this is utter drivel.

Curiosity · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 14:24

Milne is bloody useless, but that article is a shambles. An ill-informed one at that. The cost per head is purely for the military support, which is only needed because the 'saintly' Argentinians invaded and tried to take the islands by force.

Still, intended ethnic cleansing is fine if you're from glorious South America.

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 14:42

Wow. That's a terrible article. What a dick.

Malc · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 14:43

You know that guy who stopped a shark from attacking some kids?

Well apparently he was on sick leave for stress, and has now been sacked:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-21753342

Malc

Malc · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 14:46

William Herschel first saw your anus 132 years ago

Malc

Trooper · **Joined:** 4th Mar, 2010 **Posts:** 22396

Malc wrote:

You know that guy who stopped a shark from attacking some kids?

Well apparently he was on sick leave for stress, and has now been sacked:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-21753342

Malc

I suspect there is more to this story than that. Probably along the lines of what he told his employed he was doing with his time while they were paying him and he was off sick, and what he was actually doing. It wouldn't surprise me if the first they knew of him being in Oz was seeing the news articles, which is probably grounds for dismissal, I would have thought, regardless of his sickness.

Dimrill · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 15:44

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 15:47

Dimrill wrote:

8)

The tsunami in Japan did lead to some amazing footage. it's incredible that the waer just keeps on coming and coming and coming.

TheVision · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 15:49

That's mind blowing! Imagine driving that car? You'd be cacking yourself wouldn't you?

Curiosity · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 15:50

What's that coming over the hill?
Is it a village?
Is it a village?

Quality three point turn. No pressure there!

Grim... · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:00

I'm fairly sure I would have risked mounting the kerb.

TheVision · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:01

Grim... wrote:

I'm fairly sure I would have risked mounting the kerb.

I'm not sure that they had the space to do that. There's a ditch just on the other side of the kerb and judging by how the car turns, it could have ended up in it.

That and driving on the kerb is illegal!

markg · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 16640

I dunno it looks a pretty high kerb. I seem to remember a few awful clips like that of people driving for their lives. I hope they made it.

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:04

Had that been me it would have been:

Turn Car
Switch off engine
Count to three
Engage reverse
Switch on engine
Reverse
Switch off engine
Count to three
Engage first
Switch on engine
Drive away

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49244

That video is of course sped up. So they had a bit more time to think and act than it looks.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

If it had been you in Japan you wouldn't have been driving a shitheap Ka, Mali.

Craster - pretty sure it's not by much.

markg · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 16640

Yeah even at normal speed they only just made the turn in time.

Grim... · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:14

MaliA wrote:

Had that been me it would have been:

Turn Car
Switch off engine
Count to three
Engage reverse
Switch on engine
Reverse
Switch off engine
Count to three
Engage first
Switch on engine
Drive away

I told you the time about how a tractor tried to get me burned to death, right?

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:14

Grim... wrote:

MaliA wrote:

Had that been me it would have been:

Turn Car
Switch off engine
Count to three
Engage reverse
Switch on engine
Reverse
Switch off engine
Count to three
Engage first
Switch on engine
Drive away

I told you the time about how a tractor tried to burn me to death, right?

Yes. heh. I'd forgotten about that.

The Ka is not a shitheap, it jsut needs a new clutch.

The new clutch looks distinctly like a bike, though.

Grim... · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:17

The tractor wasn't a shitheap! The tractor was beautiful!

The current owner has promised to sell it to me when it eventually carks it, so I can restore it and polish it and keep it safe like it did for me.

Curiosity · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:19

MaliA wrote:

Had that been me it would have been:

Turn Car
Switch off engine
Count to three
Drown

FTFY

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49244

Curiosity wrote:

MaliA wrote:

Had that been me it would have been:

Turn Car
Switch off engine
Count to three
CAR SURF TO FREEDOM

FTFY

FTAFY.

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:20

Grim... wrote:

The tractor wasn't a shitheap! The tractor was beautiful!

The current owner has promised to sell it to me when it eventually carks it, so I can restore it and polish it and keep it safe like it did for me.

I was replying to kissyfur, but couldn't be bothered to quote him as I am the only one ehre today so about to issue a decree giving me a payrise and then sending myself home early.

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 16:21

Cras wrote:

Curiosity wrote:

MaliA wrote:

Had that been me it would have been:

Turn Car
Switch off engine
Count to three
CAR SURF TO FREEDOM

FTFY

FTAFY.

The Ka has a huge internal volume, so I imagine would be quite bouyant. I got the tandem in tehre.

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 18:28

Downside: Packed train and mrsa is sitting at the other end.
Upside: seems to be a girl's sixth form "visit the north day".

Zardoz · **Posted:** Wed Mar 13, 2013 22:30

Roxy Music are awesome.

Satsuma · **Joined:** 20th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 14418

My eye's twitching. No, the other one.

Bamba · **Joined:** 25th Jul, 2010 **Posts:** 11128

So, this is a thing. An unbelievable, bizarre, jaw-dropping thing.

Grim... · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 11:11

Bamba wrote:

So, this is a thing. An unbelievable, bizarre, jaw-dropping thing.

WTFF?

Bamba · **Joined:** 25th Jul, 2010 **Posts:** 11128

Grim... wrote:

Bamba wrote:

So, this is a thing. An unbelievable, bizarre, jaw-dropping thing.

WTFF?

It's insane isn't it? Just when you think that the violently misogynistic theme is as low as things can go the horrendous racism pops-up to join in the party! Mind-boggling.

chinnyhill10 · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 15695

Bamba wrote:

So, this is a thing. An unbelievable, bizarre, jaw-dropping thing.

Wyngarde is an old friend of the forum.

Gloucester bus station, yesterday.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

What is the thing?

chinnyhill10 · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 15695

Mr Kissyfur wrote:

What is the thing?

The Peter Wyngade song "Rape" from his album "When Sex Leers Its Inquisitive Head".

YOG · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 12:21

Burger King and mutual genital torture day.

ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!

Steak & BJ Day: for irredeemable twats who deserve neither.

chinnyhill10 · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 15695

Bamba wrote:

Grim... wrote:

Bamba wrote:

So, this is a thing. An unbelievable, bizarre, jaw-dropping thing.

WTFF?

It's insane isn't it? Just when you think that the violently misogynistic theme is as low as things can go the horrendous racism pops-up to join in the party! Mind-boggling.

Quote:

Rape
Rape - rape - rape, rape, rape!
Rape - rape, rape, rape!
It's utterly amazing how many different kinds of rape there are!

There's Italian Rape
Uno, due, tres, quatro, cinque, quante Lira.
Look into my eye-a-balls, you will see the fire!
How much Lira have you got-a ? Only a quarter?
Oh Madonna, you didn't oughta - for that I'll have your daughter !

Japanese Rape, of course!
American Rape is full of hate and we're told, practically every minute of the hour.
And the way we're going we'll never be late,
Except for that date, with impatient Black Power!
Beginnings of Chinese Rape - endless!

One does need time, as any Englishman will explain,
If only to apologise for the agonising convenience caused
To Mother Nature's forbidden walls!
In France of course, where fun is greedy,
The women are a little more seedy.
And rape is hardly ever necessary.
So even if the Franc is down, la plume de ma tante is always up and around!

In Germany it isn't always remembered,
What with Liszt, Wagner and Tannhauser,
The rape is synonymous with whips, bunkers and Mauser.
Which makes it all comparatively kinky -
With gas thrown in to get rid of the stinky!

In Russia it's far too cold for anything so bold!
And being notoriously political (if a trifle hypocritical)
Rape becomes piratical,
And Czechoslovakia far more suitable!
Which makes the whole thing rather nasty, tasteless and hasty.
But as Jason King would say, it depends so much on what you fancy!

MaliA · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 13:48

Top porn search terms!

Trooper · **Joined:** 4th Mar, 2010 **Posts:** 22396

MaliA wrote:

Top porn search terms!

Raincoat?

Kern · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 14:38

I'm waiting for Internet wits to start selling t-shirts saying 'Frankie say Kyrie eleison'.

chinnyhill10 · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 15695

Officially the maddest seller on Ebay. Shaking my head with tears of laughter/despair.

Warning NSFW as contains terrible drawings of semi naked elderly soap stars.

http://t.co/KZGccGskyT

Pod · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 2568

MaliA wrote:

Top porn search terms!

American porn is prolific and terrible. It's a bit too aggressive and everyone in it looks like the Ultimate Warrior. I can understand why people would search for their own nationality, and definitely understand why people search for 'Indian MILF'.

YOG · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 17:05

This article is hilariously awful: http://www.foreignpolicy.com/articles/2 ... s_of_girls

"Hannah manages to insert herself into every situation, making it all about her - a process that evokes myriad U.S. military interventions". Utterly vapid arsewater.

Bamba · **Joined:** 25th Jul, 2010 **Posts:** 11128

YOG wrote:

This article is hilariously awful: http://www.foreignpolicy.com/articles/2 ... s_of_girls

"Hannah manages to insert herself into every situation, making it all about her - a process that evokes myriad U.S. military interventions". Utterly vapid arsewater.

You can't read that without a membership to the site.

YOG · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 18:18

Weird, it wasn't doing that when I read it earlier. Sorry!

Grim... · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 21:07

It's pi day. I totally missed that.

Satsuma · **Joined:** 20th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 14418

Have we all seen this yet?

Grim... · **Posted:** Thu Mar 14, 2013 22:10

I've seen one of him doing stand up.

Aha!

Be Excellent To Each Other

Bits And Bobs 38
Two time slammy award winner

Who is online

Be Excellent To Each Other

Bits And Bobs 38 Two time slammy award winner

Who is online

Bits And Bobs 38
Two time slammy award winner