Be Excellent To Each Other

http://youparklikeacunt.com/

Pictures of people that park like the url name suggests

Aside from the url name its safe for work

Thing about the people straddling two spaces is that you never know if they've been forced to park like that because someone (who has since driven off) parked badly, too.

A guy at work straddles two spaces every single day, in a carousel that is empty at 8am when we arrive but heaving by 8am. He's an arse.

Carousel? That should say car park.

That's the least of your worries with that sentence.

The fewest of your worrys.

Must be really difficult to hit the window to park in that carpark without being the only car there.

It would help a bit if the people who drew out the parking spaces didn't seem to think that everyone still drives around in Hillman Imps or Austin Allegros.

This is true. If I had a Lambo I'd straddle two spaces.

Something something I'd straddle your mum.

Your mum takes up two spaces.

It's a work car park, so everyone turns up between 8 and 9, we just start at 8am so there's only ever one or two cars there at that point. Only about a quarter of the cars park there as the others use the bigger car park down the road.

Read your post again.

Shh

We did not notice.

The Stupid Idiot Parking on the Isle of Man Facebook page is pretty good:

http://www.facebook.com/StupidIdiotPark ... an?fref=ts

I now routinely straddle two parking spaces as the supermarket in the Porsche. After the third dint in the one of the doors of my pride and joy, where some stupid cow, usually in a 4x4 or similar, has opened their door right into my car (once whilst I was still in it - hitting so hard so as to rock the whole car, then trying to deny it despite the fact *I was there* and some of their blue paint was actually embedded into the dent), I got sick of parking considerately.

People give me all kinds of looks but I don't give a shit and just carry on regardless, usually engaging the super-loud sports exhaust button to piss them off even more upon pulling away. (See also parent-kid parking spaces with their extra wide bays - they do the job too )

I've never parked in a disabled spot though.

You know Cavey that's a massive bugbear for me. Parent and child spaces are invaluable for parents with, y'know, children.

We don't have a blue badge for AE Jnr although we could get one due to her disability, but on balance we manage to get by with the parent and child spaces. The wide bays and the fact that the parent and child area is separate from the rest of the car park does the job alright, so despite AE Jnr being incredibly skittish and quite unpredictable, the parent and child park is a safe option for us, and we can leave the disabled spaces for those further along the disability spectrum.

I politely challenge anyone I see parking up in the parent and child area if they're minus children, would your answer to me be that you need somewhere to park your Porsche where it won't get scratched?

Yes it's a pain in the arse when other people are so careless and inconsiderate as to damage your car, but is your response really just 'Well fuck everyone then, I'm going to use a parent and child space'?

I'm surprised, in all honesty, I wouldn't have thought you were the type.



It's not as black and white as you're making out.

I know what you're saying mate and I know it's wrong of me - but seriously, how many times am I to be expected to pay hundreds of pounds to have damage like this repaired, through no fault of my own? It's not as though I can use my insurance to pay for it - the excess is too large and in any case, my premiums would go through the roof.

Equally, it's not as though people have the decency to leave a note on the windscreen either - like I said, trying to deny it even when they *knew* what they'd just done? (It was only when I threatened to call the police that she relented and then I got a whole bunch of grief over how much it cost etc... I just don't need the hassle, and that was one of the "better" occasions, for at least it didn't (eventually) come out of *my* pocket).

I'm just not prepared to pay out £850/month to drive a car that's full of (someone else's) dints and consequently looks ruined. (Not to mention facing a whole bunch of hassle come the end of the hire purchase rental period, when I might opt to hand the car back as opposed to paying the final balloon and/or losing valuable equity in the car to put towards the next deposit etc. Why should I have to pay for this?)

I think Mark raises a very good point that many of these car parks are too tight for today's monstrous 4x4s and people-carriers that people seem to routinely think they need as daily transport for whatever reason. However, I just think that the average person is a shit driver and far too careless with other people's stuff.

(I would say that if someone politely challenged me on the parent parking spot thing I would feel compelled to move; I would be *so much* of an arse so as to refuse to move when "busted" as it were).

I park in parent and child bays. 'Cos I go with my mum.



I do. They take liberties by parking in our able-bodied spaces. Let them get away with that, next thing you know, they'll be using our toilets.


Anyone who parks in the "drop-off" bays at Tescos need to be shot. No judge, no jury, just straight to execution. When I rule the world, the moment a car is left empty in one of those bays, it gets clamped. With £100 release fee.

They're too narrow for "normal" cars too, though. In the interests of science I thought I'd have a look and see, the first car I checked was the most standard of standard family cars, a mid-sized Ford. It turns out that the current Focus is 30cm wider than a MK2 Escort which is a lot really. I suspect that UK parking spaces haven't really changed much since the 70s. (Interestingly a lot of the people carriers and 4x4s are actually pretty similar in width to normal cars, I think they must just look closer when you're parked next to them because they're so tall).

I tend to avoid parking next to anything which looks like a family car simply because it might have kids in and kids are fucking idiots.

Meh. Well, like I said, I would never be so inconsiderate as to park in a disabled bay, so I'm not sure of the point that you're making there.

But anyway, if people don't like inconsiderate parkers like me, then perhaps they should, y'know, actually bother to *look* out of their posh van on stilts 4x4 or people carrier's windows before swinging their doors open, with great gusto, right into my (much lower, black) sportscar's body, before fucking off into another space sharpish and leaving me with a big bill to pay. Again. Simples!

Purely anecdotal of course, but on each occasion in my case it's been the driver's side door that's copped it, meaning it's the front adult's passenger door of the other car that's done the damage.

Mind you, on the last occasion, some Range Rover reverse-stuffed right into the back of the Boxster at some speed - doing £2,300 worth of damage to the rear bumper and body, before driving off. It wouldn't have mattered how considerately I was parked; the fucking thing was too high, and the driver too utterly shit, to have even noticed my hapless little sportscar. I doubt that fucking needlessly big, fuel-guzzling, polluting fat tank of a tractor, for the penile-challenged driver, got even so much as a scratch in the process. (I know it was a Range Rover because someone told me when I came out of the shop; they "didn't see the number plate" though, and the shop "couldn't find the CCTV tape"... it was some posh place around where I live and I'm betting they were a regular customer. Like, cheers then).

As a complete aside, some bellend in a Discovery pulled right out on me on the Harley yesterday - with my missus riding pillion. Didn't even bother to look at the junction, didn't realise what she'd done after the fact either, even as I raised my angry fist upon passing... looked at me as though it was my fault...? Like, sorry for even being on the road at all, love. Man alive, I *HATE* road-going 4x4s and their drivers. Can't we introduce a £3000 road tax for them?

This.
If you can't use a Porsche to do the shopping, don't use a Porsche to do the shopping.

Why shouldn't I? It's a small car, it doesn't take up much space.

If people can't be trusted to show due regard for my property - just as I do theirs, either because they're too stupid, unobservant and/or inconsiderate, then bollocks to 'em, just as if they're not prepared to have sufficient common decency to leave their details when they do cause damage. I'm not going to keep paying out, and nor am I going to stop using my car on their account.

I sometimes use the parent and child parking spaces, but only if:

a) there's multiple spaces left

AND

b) it's within an hour of closing time

AND

c) I'm doing my Mum's shopping (even though she's not with me, I consider it "parent and child.")

Apparently, it takes up two spaces.

Well yeah, it does now, that's for sure.
Unless it's in a child-parent bay, then it only takes one.

Why not park at a quieter bit of the car park & use your feet?

To be fair Wullie, I already do this - I use two spaces at the quieter end of a given car park precisely because I don't want people hassling me and in any case, it's not as though you get adjoining empty spaces where everyone wants to park anyway.

(I've never understood people's obsession about saving walking perhaps 10-20 yards and insisting on parking as close to the supermarket as possible, for the sake of an extra 15 second walk lol. My wife does this and moans like hell if I don't park close to wherever we're going).

But the parent and child parking is always close to the store entrance, so how does that fit in with what you've just said?

Back when I'd just got the Scooby and it was all lovely and shiny, I was a bit worried about supermarket car park damage, so all I did was park pretty much as far away from the entrance as I could, and walk to the store from there. This worked extremely well, even at the very busy local Tesco (which I avoid like the plague wherever possible but there was something specific that Mrs AE had asked me to get that Shoprite don't sell), as the vast majority of people are incredibly fucking lazy and will avoid even a 45 second walk at all possible cost. Even when the store was rammed I could always find myself a quiet bit of car park to stick my car in. Parking on the end of a row works well too as you can get properly tight in to leave as much space as possible next door.

Whichever way you want to try and slice it Cavey, parking up in a parent and child space because you don't want your Porsche to get scratched is a selfish arsehole move and you can't justify it on the grounds of saving yourself some cash.

Well, fairly obviously, I don't take up two parent spaces! It's either one or the other.



I do all of those things as well, except that I take up two spaces in the quiet bit of the car park, where these isn't an individual demarcated space available (where I know no-one can park next to me).



Oh come on man. Occasionally parking in a child-parent spot for 10 mins isn't crime of the bleeding century; loads of people do this except that they wouldn't admit it. I don't do it in the Golf and I'm not doing it to be a twat, or because I am too lazy to walk a few extra yards. I'm doing it because other people have repeatedly fucked my car up and have been a bloody sight more inconsiderate that I'll ever be, by not having the decency to leave their details. In terms of "saving some cash", the last repair was £2,300 and had to be done through insurance - after I'd paid the £500 excess that is (and, no doubt, increased insurance premiums year on year from here on. So y'know, it's quite a lot of cash, which I'd much rather have in my back pocket, even if it does disgruntle a few people in Sainsbury's car park from time to time.

Listen bud, I know it's a bit shit but people could say the same about all manner of stuff like speeding or whatever, that people routinely do.

So why don't you park in the disabled spots then? They're not for you either?

I guess I draw the distinction between someone who is disabled and someone who just happens to have a kid in the car.

Well, I'm not going to get drawn into an argument but I would like to say that you shouldn't park in the parent bays just to save a few dents.

It's near impossible to get a car seat out in a normal space and it's easier to dent the car next to you if you haven't got the space so... you parking in the parent and child bay just means someone else is even more likely to get a dent in their car. Just think of how many cars have been dented, and in turn, how much our insurance premiums have gone up by people claiming who haven't got as high an excess as you.

You're not part of the solution Cavey... If I were you, I'd park at the back of the car park and walk the extra few yards.

Well that just shows the depth of your ignorance with regards to how hard it can be to perform an apparently simple task such as going shopping with a small child (or children).

Notwithstanding my personal situation (shopping with a disabled child and finding the parent and child spaces 'good enough' so that we don't need to take up a disabled space, although I'll gladly give it up so your Porsche can stay extra shiny ), it can be plenty hard enough for a parent with a perfectly 'normal' child or two, or three, in tow.

Parent and child spaces give parents a little bit of a helping hand with the task of going shopping, which if a child is tired, or cranky, or uncooperative, can be a nightmare. And that's before you deal with car seats, and the extra space at the side that requires.

And it's not just as easy as 'don't go shopping if your child is in a bad mood' either, because you might need nappies, or baby formula, or other essential items that won't wait until tomorrow.

When it's dark, and pissing down, and blowing a gale, and you've got a child screaming at you in frustration, but you have no damn choice but to get some shopping in, what might look like a 'nice convenience' for someone else in the form of a parent and child parking space, can be an absolute fucking life-saver for a tired, strung out parent who hasn't slept properly in a week.

Harsh!

I'm not saying it's right, I'm just admitting that I occasionally do it, if I'm bobbing in for 10 mins or whatever. Sheesh; I mean seriously, I'd suggest not hanging around in a supermarket car park too often then as you'll either have a heart attack or be crying buckets of tears - every other bugger does it.

It's a bit shit like I've said, but you yourself like speeding, don't you? No-one's ever died from not getting a parent-child parking space, but plenty of people have been splatted because of speeding motorists. (Note that I speed on occasion as well, as does just about everyone I know)

I think a sense of perspective is needed; people break little 'rules', for selfish reasons, all of the time.

it's a bloody parking space, not a life or death situation.
How did people cope without them I wonder, life must have been a distraught hell...

People coped by denting other peoples cars.

I've chased people across carparks before shouting "SIR! SIR! YOU'VE LEFT YOUR CHILD IN THE CAR SIR!"

Go to some new places (the big Tesco which recently opened in Caerphilly was very guilty of this) and the spaces are absolutely tiny. The Octavia was NOT a big car but if I got it perfect, it fit precisely within the confines of the typical UK parking space. Pity anyone with any vehicle larger than that.

With the Celica, then, with its large doors, narrow roof and sill-less windows. The number of times I caught my face or ear on the window trying to shimmy into it, because the spaces were so damned narrow.



So are the parents. You ever notice if someone's parked at the side of the road and they're leaning into the car to strap their vile little fucker (invariably with a stupid name, feel free to pick one that's suitably loathsome) into the back seat, they ALWAYS pick the ROAD side of the car to stand on? Why not go around to the other side where there isn't traffic, and do it from there? Even if the child seat is on the road side, you can just climb in there too, in a position of safety, to strap the thrashing thing in?

Or you could just buy a minivan with car-style rear doors and let them swing into the side of my car while I'm in the space next to you, and sitting in the car too.

I broke the rules once by nudging a trolley into someones posh car in a parent and child space. I know it was selfish, but it made me feel better.

Parking in a parent/child space in a "posh car" = you deserve to have criminal damage willfully committed against your property...

I'm surprised at you mate, you always come across as an entirely reasonable Mr Nice Guy type.

As someone who had to park on the road (no driveway) for eight years, you bastard, TheVision. The amount of deliberate scratches, chips and damage from complete cunts is bad and stressful enough without people 'making themselves feel better' doing it in the supermarket too.

Also, gentlemen: Your lady friends, do they carry enormous fashionable handbags with lots of metal zippers and chains and clasps? Do you SCREAM as they set said bag down heavily upon the paintwork of your car so they can fish around inside for lip balm or Olbas Oil or whathaveyou?

"Hmph, fine!," they respond, snatching the bag away SIDEWAYS so it slides along the flat surface and then scrapes down the side!

I am.. Honestly I am, it was admittedly a moment of madness. One which I perhaps shouldn't have admitted to. Also, when I say posh.. I meant a chavvy type posh, dark windows, big exhaust, silly stickers in the window. (Not that it makes it any better of course)

**Edit** @Metalangel but that's completely different. You're not breaking any rules by parking on the road. Clearly, I'm not a mindless vandal so I wouldn't damage a car like that.

As for the ladies handbag problem? I get around this by always holding the door open for any lady friends.

Really? Apart from that time when you did. You might have thought that car was 'chavvy' but the effort and expensive you describe as being lavished on it suggests it was someone else's pride and joy.

I cannot believe the behaviour of some of the people in here. I am shocked and appalled.

Maybe the trolley had a wobbly wheel and you did it by accident?

I guess two wrongs don't make a right after all? Driving cars really can bring out the worst in people.

Personally I like parking in parents-with-kids spaces whilst indulging in a spot of PC gaming at the same time. (Man, the DLC sure is slow to upload via a USB GSM modem)

I am thus, in fact, worse than Hitler. Sorry everyone.