Be Excellent To Each Other

Sounds like a great weekend Zaphod, happy birthday

Weddings are a trifle expensive, aren't they?

Jeez.

I don't know, mine cost about £150. You're doing it wrong

Oh no, we are planning to do it very right, hence the horrific cost of the party

I was responsible for one thing at our wedding - dinner.

As a result, the whole thing was ridiculously expensive.

Fucking Hell. You've got to imagine a fair number will be broken now, but even so.

That's ~ 80 apps per person, which I can fully believe. Cor.

I've got about 80 apps, and I only really use twitter, PvZ, Facebook and Dungeon Raid.

Interesting question actually. Without checking, what apps can I think of that I actually use on my phone? (other than the installed apps)

Tapatalk
Navfree
Lloyds banking app
Torch app

That's pretty much it I think, I have loads of games and play them for between 1 minute and a few hours total, so they don't count.

It was such a fine warm day out here in West Tennessee that I borrowed a friend's bike and went cycling around the Shiloh battlefield. I've been tramping it a lot on this trip and on my 2009 excursion, but I felt I really got a feel for it by riding around. I now feel a bit stiff - first proper cycling I've done in over two years. But it's only 30 minutes to the battlefield, so I'll be out on the bike again I think.

So. Just had my first ever 60 seconds look at pinterest.

I've concluded it's make up, cake, positive slogans and artistic soft porn. Let me know if I'm wrong.

There was some astonishing statistic I saw the other day that said I think 92% of Pinterest users have a wedding board.

Pinterest is where the mentals live.

Yeah, it pisses me off.

"We're having a party, and if you don't come we'll take it as a personal sleight." So you end up travelling half the length of the country, spending a hundred quid on a hotel room for the night at the venue, as it's the only place to stay, spend another fifty on a present from their wedding list, even though the couple have lived together for the past five years and own two properties between them so they clearly need new dinner fucking plates. After that, you see them for two minutes and spend the rest of the day making small talk with strangers, after having some teat make you hang about for photos, before spending another hundred quid at the bar with its own inflated prices before collapsing into bed at two in the morning so you really get to enjoy the opulence of your surroundings through a drunken haze then a stinking hangover. Then you get to go home again. And all this is after you spend the same amount going on a stag do, as not going would be a personal sleight, because you've really always wanted to go go-karting in Manchester before visiting shitty bars with your mate in a comedy outfit.

<amends invite list>

Yeah. You could probably bring the price down a little bit by - hmm, I dunno - maybe not giving away iPads?

Never heard of it before, it looks like tumblr to me

it's the feeding 60 people that costs the serious cash

Tell me about it. The food at my wedding was nice, not mind-bendingly good by any stretch, but it was still about £40 a head. I can't even remember what it was.

That's not the fault of stag dos, it's the fault of shit stag dos. What you should do is go to Belgium, 'meet'* your future next wife and then not see any muff.

*We were in the same bar. That's 'met', right?

Stag dos are great you fool! If you actually like your friends and don't see them much anymore...

Why would you not see them if you like them?

I live in a different city! I tend to see them once a month or so.

But a good stag do is a weekend somewhere of pure fun times with your chums.

Cor this needle stings today.

...and another pint out in near record time. Which considering the record sent me into shock, I'm not eager to beat.

There has been discussion about a "fake" stag do, where everyone has a turn at being the stag for an hour or so. And you get to go out/away.

That's brilliant.

There's a slightly confused piece in The Grauniad about aspects of a the snappily titled "Legal Aid, Sentencing and Punishment of Offenders Bill " in the Lords at the moment. It apepars to be written from the press release, as they've gotten the clause wrong (it's 136). And also contradicts itself between a the first and fifth paragraphs. That notwithstanding, I was quite surprised to learn that if you do return home and find your property occupied by undesirables, you can remove them under current laws (using reasonable force - which I'd define as popping down the closest pub and offering £30 to a couple of burly blokes to assist, and maybe a dog or two). The comments seem to cover the large number of unoccupied houses and how unfair this is to homeless people and stuff, so I suspect they are trying to stick one issue on to another more emotive one.

I sometimes wonder if these pieces are written just to get the comments section going. It, like many of the other comment is free things, is decidedly poor writing.

Ooh!

In other news, I just had a 3 and a half hour Civil Litigation exam. It was fucking horrible. I know my stuff, and everything I expected to come up came up, but the questions were absolute bastards. Hopefully I passed it. Fucking heck.

Love it.

The Grimlet spies some marks on Mrs Grim...'s stomach that her jeans have made, and asks what they were. I thought he was referring to her stretch marks, so I told him he had made those marks while he was in her tummy.

He looks at her and says "Mummy - did you eat me?"

So did she?

A present for Grim...

She looks like the Joker.

MOTHER OF GOD

What's wrong with her face?! She's got one eye going down to the shops and the other coming back with the change. /sexist

Mainly: The fact it's not buried in my crotch.

Because I listen to an Arsenal podcast, I know this is her husband:

I wish Rex Features was his name.

So I attended a historical meeting tonight. Being Americans, they opened with a prayer, then a pledge of allegiance to the US flag, to the flag of the state of Mississippi, and, er, to the Confederate flag. As a subject of Her Britannic Majesty, I just stood with my arms by my side feeling awkward. I was pleased that my yank friend refused to honour - sorry, 'honor' - the latter two flags too though (he doesn't live in Mississippi and hates the rebels, after all...).

2 games of innebandy in 3 days. Sore is not the word. At least we made it into the slutspelet however.

Well done. I think.

The top 6 teams have a sort of playoff tournament after the league has finished. We're definately in it

And you with a lovely girlfriend, too. Dirty boy.

I've just dicovered that the number that flickr randomly assigned to one of my steinway pictures is also the phone number of an escort service in The Czech Republic.

The number is 5841943932, in case you're interested.

Yundbingy.

How did you discover this?

He dials every number from his uploaded photos into his phone on the off chance

He has the phone number of every escort agency between here and the urals memorized, in case of escort emergencies!

Current target date to correct the spelling of my name used for my company email account is 8th March.

I used to work with a guy called Adam Hawker. Unfortunately the IT guys misheard and had him down as a.porker.

An IT guy I worked with reported a woman who started called Amanda Rouse. They had a first-initial-second-name-no-delimiter email policy. She wasn't happy.