Be Excellent To Each Other

Hello. Put down your washing machines a second and let's go for a bus ride.

Welcome to Bus & Cable Car Simulator, where you get to drive buses and cable cars around San Francisco! You also get to drive trolley buses and streetcars too, but the title is already struggling to fit on the box.

This is the menu screen... I wasn't sure if the duplicators had put the right program on the disc or not!



The game itself loads and I appear to be in some sort of crack den. I continue to be unsure this is the correct game. Empty pizza boxes, bottles and trash are piled everywhere. I go outside.



Outside is a trash-filled pickup. There's a number of fast travel points on the map but I'm not allowed to fast travel to them unless I've drive there 'properly' once.



The game suggests you drive all the way to the convention centre to be tormented by all the vehicles you can't use yet (more on that in a moment) all in a row, but I've left that tedious drive out and instead gone straight to the tedious drive to the bus depot. So, off we go.



Once at the depot, I go into the most badly decorated room in existence and speak to its sole occupant, the supervisor, to pick which route I want.



As I only have standard diesel bus, I can only do diesel bus routes for now. These all seem authentic. This bus depot is real, and is very near the hotel I stayed in in real life. We used route 30 to get back from Ghirardelli Square to the hotel. However, I fancy something a bit longer, and pick route 47.



The bus magically appears outside in the otherwise empty lot, and I go through the lengthy startup sequence.



You have to pump the door open (no air pressure), switch on the battery, start the engine, and while waiting for air pressure to build you can program the route indicator signs. The game encourages you to even put 'not in service' on your signs to avoid disappointing waiting passengers as you make your way to the start of your chosen route. My route starts just outside so I immediately program it to route 47.





The first stop, the passengers are already waiting for me. On the left is the F streetcar line, which loops around a few blocks here at the end of the Embarcadero. It uses vintage streetcars, mostly PCC and Peter Whitt cars that were built for Italy. They're from an age before noise pollution laws, as I found to my cost as they rumbled past the hotel window first thing in the morning. Anyway, let's stop and pick the passengers up!



You even need to dispense tickets! Luckily, it tells you the type, and there's only three fares, so you will remember them all by the end of your first route. A lot of passengers have passes and just get on without needing to be sold a ticket. And yes, a large number of very hot women (many of them redheads!) live in SF.



You get penalized for leaving early, so I have time to look around. Not being an owl, the game lets you see the whole interior of your vehicle, so you can ensure everyone who's getting off via the rear doors has done so.



You can also zoom out for an external view, fun for judging tight corners. Though I don't remember it, it would seem from observing the AI buses that you're meant to turn your 4-ways on when stopped, not just signal towards the curb while stopped and then away when pulling off, European-style.



For some reason, all the buses and trucks in the city are plastered with badly translated ads with pictures of yet more hot women.



I haven't gotten far before I encounter an intersection absolutely jammed with cars. The traffic AI is a bit wonky, and in this case it remained stuck. Luckily, there's a 'reset' button that will delete traffic cars and then move your vehicle if it's become physically jammed. Alas, my little jaunt down Lombard street yesterday was lost when FRAPS decided to change its capture key and didn't grab any of the hilarious pictures I took.



The city is alive, and you'll pass other transit vehicles going about their business too. The cable cars stop correctly in intersections to take on passengers. Incorrectly, the other traffic doesn't seem to wait.



This bus decided to pull across my path to get to a bus stop first.





And then, a moment latter, it vanished into thin air of its own accord. This happens rather more often than it should.



Get this flashy jerk in his expensive Nova bus. Can I fit through that gap?



Yes, yes I can.



I think my first purchase using the credits I'm earning will be the ability to drive one of these trolley buses.



The traffic AI sometimes gets it wrong and crashes. The physics engine itself is supremely wonky, with even gentle taps sometimes sending vehicles bouncing 50 feet into the air.



At the edges of the city the designers have tried to conceal the map boundaries with construction zones. This just means a huge traffic jam which makes you late.



Keep your ears open for the 'bong' of the stop request button, as unlike some city buses, these don't have automatically opening rear doors.



BANG! Even after a crash like this, both vehicles are unscathed and drive off as if nothing happened.



Having successfully finished my route (despite the huge smash) I declined to do the return run, and instead went into the nearby depot. There's mini-jobs to be had too, so I decided to try being the repair man.



You're given the service truck and have to go find the stricken bus.



Upon arrival at the scene, I open the engine cover and have a look inside.



I think I have bigger problems than that right now, game.



The service truck didn't have any belts in its various compartments, so I had to find one. I drove off to look for a fan belt store. I came across this gas station, I wonder if they sell them?



Yes, yes they do. Cakes, fresh fruit, fuses and fan belts. Which I have to pay for out of my own pocket, it seems! Considering I have to buy my own transit vehicles too, I shouldn't be surprised, I suppose.



Fan belt in hand and lighter of pocket, I returned to the bus at a high rate of speed. Get out of the way, I've got my orange lights flashing for a reason!



Yes, this is really what you have to do to install the new fan belt.



Task completed, I returned to the depot to get paid, almost half my earnings lost to the fan belt.



So there we have it.

Some thoughts:
-in spite of the plain looks and sparse traffic, the game engine runs really slowly as you can see from my FRAPS counter in the corner.
-everything feels like it's runnning in slow motion, with the buses and civilian cars all slowly pootling around at the most leisurely of paces.
-having to buy/unlock the majority of the vehicles is rather annoying.
-I had more CTDs than I could count.
-the installer didn't work properly, possibly because setup.exe is over a gig in size. I had to copy the DVD onto my hard drive and then install it from there.
-I'm going to try to set my joypad to work with it, as it's very hard on the fingers playing on the keys.

And now, a wee rant:
The whole 'live a bus driver's life' thing is misguided. Back when I was a kid, I thought the idea of an all-inclusive flight simulator was a great idea, where you had to walk out of your house, get in your car and drive to the airfield first. However, now with less free time, having to drive to the bus depot, talk to the supervisor, walk to the bus, drive to the start of the route etc etc etc wastes hours when I should be able to just pick a route and vehicle from a menu like every other simulator out there, and get on with it. I'd hate to think of someone who only wanted the streetcars or cablecars being forced to mess around driving the crappy starter bus for hours before they're allowed to use what they bought the game for (or indeed, just giving up in disgust). It's not helped that the city, while more authentic looking than the Crazy Taxi-esque SF seen in Drivel: San Francisco, is completely lifeless and boring. I don't really care about buying my avatar sunglasses or new clothes or a better apartment, because there's no point. It doesn't even add 'colour' to the game world.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed our little trip around the City By The Bay. I'll post some more once I've unlocked a new vehicle or two.

I love you.

I love you perkies.

Where do you find these nonsenses?

I think there must a a PC game section in his local Poundland.

I admire your dedication Perkies, reading about your adventures in these games is probably a lot more fun than actually playing them.

You never cease to amaze me, Perkies!

This is exactly what I was going to post.

Almost all these sims are German, nickachu. They love this sort of thing. Astragon makes them, Excalibur Publishing sells them in English.

Oh my, there is quite a selection there.

And surprisingly expensive! Street cleaner sim looks interesting!

Great stuff.

Apparently it (Street Cleaner) is not very good, though.

http://www.rockpapershotgun.com/2011/07 ... simulator/

You can see it's in the same game engine and everything.

Awesome

Me too. And I genuinely mean it.

I also want to play this game, which means I'm almost as broken as he is.

I always look forward when I see something like this appear.

I, sadly, look backwards, and thus the huge enjoyment I might otherwise gain from the magnificence of these run-throughs is ruined by the fact that I'm staring at the wall.

You see, people? This is what exercise does to you!

Oh, brilliant. I love these. I love Perkies

Gaze.

Metallophone.

This is amazing

I can barely see what's going on in here through the haze of Perkies Love, though!

The rain effects are amazing, they even refract the lights on the traffic.

The buying a fan belt bit is brilliant. I want to be the bus repairman!

Me too, I particularly like the parts where the game engines flip out and odd things happen.

Awesome!
Also: you never did drive that truck back to Thunder Bay, did you?

Excellent. MOAR, I insist!

Yay! Very good. Write more. Please.

Is there a bomb on the bus that's wired to the velocitator at any point?

That is fantastic..


What is next?

What is the "Obeying the law in GTA4" thing?

How did you miss that!?!
Another Metalangel Masterwork:
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=5604&st=0&sk=t&sd=a

Ak - I meant "where", not "what".

But ta!

Now tell me where that comic of the dogs lives before Rorschach turned up is.

Ooh, that was me. God knows.

Here you go

viewtopic.php?p=540063#p540063

Edit: Except the imgur link appears to have reversed the order of the pictures, completely ruining the surprise and the point.

That was an excellent read. I've always been tempted by games like this, but reading about you playing them is far more entertaining then actually doing it myself.

Still fucking brilliant.

Hello! I'm back. Before I start, I'm going to be clear and say I had to download someone else's savegame, one in which he'd unlocked all the vehicles. I actually DREAMT about this game last night (specifically the horrific route to the mountainous Treasure Island) and decided this morning to resume my quest to earn more damn money to get the trolleybus and streetcar. Well, that didn't work out. I reached the first stop on Treasure Island and after the first passenger got on, the second just stood there. I tried pulling forward in case her pathfinding wasn't working, and the game popped me the negative achievement for leaving passengers behind. Enraged, I took off at speed, and decided to take a shortcut down a switchback by just driving off the cliff. My bus got wedged, and I turned the game off. I tried again to peek at my save file with a hex editor, and seeing one entry for 'CrashCount=8' I decided to change the 8 to a 0. The game refused to load the save now (and continued to after I changed the 0 to and 1 and back to an so I had no choice but to download a save or start over again.

So, in the hopes that other frustrated players might see this on Google, a save game of Bus And Cable Car Simulator with all vehicles unlocked and lots of money is here:

http://www.2shared.com/file/E3nKo2uJ/Bu ... ave_g.html

It's password protected, but after a bit of searching I found that the password is:

http://www.ortakpaylas.com

(so thank you, mysterious Eastern European guy who suffered this game's slings and arrows, and put your save up for us to enjoy)

Here's a short look at things I've seen during my games up until now...

The windows fog up in the rain unless you turn the vents on!


The bus washer!


The beautiful rain effects (note the light being refracted by the individual raindrops)


Now, ON WITH THE SHOW!

Thanks to ortakpaylas (who I imagine as having a bad fringe and an absolutely astonishingly beautiful if skinny girlfriend), I now have access to the trolley bus! There's only one route in the game, with day and night express variants.


And here it is. What I didn't realize is that apparently trolley buses in San Francisco have a battery, which allows them to run without the wires for short distances. In the game, this is to get them out of the depot and into position.


Once out on the street, I have to attach the trolley poles (incorrectly called 'pantographs' by the German developers) to the wires.


This is far harder than it looks, as what looks like it's attached...


...actually isn't.


There! That's got it.


And away we go! Where I grew up, there was a trolley bus line at the end of the street. These lasted until 1993, and were eerily quiet. They also weren't really suited to the routes they were given, apart from the fact both ran through fairly residential areas. The real advantage of the trolley bus (apart from the quietness and lack of emissions) is the sheer power. They climb hills swiftly and accelerate on flat ground even faster. The buses in the game reflect this, a gentle hum the only sound as the reach high speeds very quickly.


Unfortunately, I've got another bus in front of me. He's doing the same route so he's taking all my passengers!


Remember, I didn't take a bendy bus. Another bus has just rearended me.


When we encounter an intersection clogged with traffic, I take the opportunity. It's time to find out what happens if I try and overtake another trolley bus! Will our poles interlock and cause a big sparky explosion?


Here we go...


Nothing happens, and I reach Market Street safely. For some reason, the trolley bus route is set so I collect my passengers from the streetcar platforms in the middle of the street.


I hear another loud bang, and look over to see one of the streetcars has just smashed into the back of a truck.


Notice that the poles on this oncoming bus are attached to the wires on the wrong side of the street! Well done, programmers.


Arriving at the big SF Terminal. Notice the green light on the dashboard has gone red. I've dewired coming around the corner to enter.


As you can see by the clock, I fought with the fucking poles for over ten minutes. This was the best I could do with them. You click and drag to position them, but they fight you and I simply could not get them to come down low enough to affix to the wire. Having done this in real life, I can attest to the amount of force needed (they are heavily sprung to keep them in contact with the wire) but this was ridiculous. I abandoned my run at this point and went to read the manual.


Well, turns out the engine needed to be off in order for them to attach. I don't recall don't that the first time I affixed them back at the depot, but never mind. Streetcar time!


So I step outside and... Dude, where's my streetcar?


Turns out it's up by Fisherman's Wharf, at the end of the loop. Luckily, I can fast travel there in my personal vehicle.


There she is! The passengers are already waiting.


This is a PCC car. Thousands of these were built, first for service in North America and then in European variants, with many still running today. I remember these running too, they lasted in revenue service until 1995.


The interior is spot on.


The driver's seat. Note that it's controlled with pedals, not a throttle lever.


Off we go. Note the small white two-aspect signal next to the traffic lights. That's the transit signal, and the one that I obey. White is proceed, red is stop.


A close up of the controls. Unfortunately, the streetcars are something of an afterthought and very few of these controls are operable, including the speedometer! A sad oversight is that the bell (or gong) plays a canned three-ring sample. In reality, the number of taps indicates what the vehicle is about to do. If I recall correctly, two was a warning the streetcar was about to start moving, for example. In real San Francisco, the drivers rang the thing wildly, especially when passing through busy areas, to announce their presence.


Once on the Embarcadero, the F Line runs in a grade separated right of way, and you can make up some serious time here if you're running late.


Indeed, I got to the Ferry Building so early I had time to run over to take a picture of the famous Embarcadero Fountain.


The Ferry Building, which hosts a fruit and vegetable market as well as ferries around the Bay Area.


Grinding around a bend towards the downtown area. Notice how the body of the car is hanging over, in Toronto they paint lines around corners in the track to mark where the streetcar's body will pass as it goes around the corner, so pedestrians and cars don't get clipped.


Hey hotness. You can ride for free... ON MY FACE! Om nom nom carrot patch etc.


The car is so long zooming out won't let you see whether people are still disembarking like on the diesel bus, so you can use your owl-like neck to turn your head 180 degrees and make sure everyone has disembarked from the centre and rear doors before you proceed.


Alas, the traffic AI hasn't been discouraged from driving along the tracks, and my progress along Market Street is slowed behind civilian cars who aren't turning left (which, IRL, is the only reason you should really be there). This blue X5 held me up for several blocks, before stopping short as his light changed, and I banged into the back of him.


Infuriated, when I saw him continue along the tracks, and preventing me from pulling up behind this trolley bus to pick passengers up from the next platform, I went full throttle into the back of him. I somehow managed to push him UNDER the bus, which was in turn lifted atop my streetcar in an almighty crash.


Seemingly out of sympathy, the game itself crashed at this point too.

There you go. I'll be back at some point with a conclusion, with bendy buses, double deck tour buses, the school bus and... yes... the cable cars!

You spoil us, sir.

If you want to see the game in motion, here's someone playing the trolleybus route with the bendy version!

Excellent stuff. I was most surprised when I went to San Francisco that all the streetcars appear to be old stock from all over the world, complete with totally incomprehensible signage in random languages.

Only the F Line has the historical streetcars, the other lines use modern Italian-built Breda cars. It's a nice tourist attraction, except the F Line ran right past our hotel window. As it's in operation 20 hours a day, and the Peter Whitt cars from Italy are 90 years old, they make a hell of a racket which isn't what you want after a night on the Anchor Steam.

Brilliant, but makes me want to go back to SF.

Just brilliant, all of it. Though I like the moments of - as it appears when looking at snapshots in pictures - sudden furious rage, obviously.

Wait, what? I took this pic in 2010...

If you turn 90 degrees to your left, I'm pretty sure you're staring at the hotel we stayed in.

It was taken at Geary & Market, if that helps.

Cars changing lanes into the side of you (sometimes while you're already stopped) happens so often now I've all but stopped bothering noticing.



Sorry if that was confusing. I was talking in a nostalgic tone about my own childhood in Toronto, as I was about the trolleybuses. This picture, for all its graininess, is actually extremely awesome to me, as it shows both the trolley buses and streetcars as I remember them. The picture itself is before my time, but the streetcar is emerging from a loop (later converted to a trolley bus loop) with my high school in the background!

Did everyone go to San Francisco last year?! Everything on the route looks eerily familiar, pleasantly nostalgic. 9/10

Richard Kunz. Heh.

You stayed in our canteen?

Brilliant! I want to drive a trollybus now, although still completely un-tempted to buy the simulator

I do like this idea though: http://www.jaylenosgarage.com/at-the-ga ... ctric-bus/

Wish they'd done trolley busses or battery busses in Edinburgh, instead of the utter shambles and waste of space that the trams have turned out to be.
This is a true fact: "I told them so".

Trolley buses, contrary to the thinking in the 1950s, aren't a replacement for streetcars so much as a replacement for diesel buses. They can't compete for sheer capacity with a streetcar in a downtown area, but a lot of cities started replacing their streetcars with trolley buses (some cities in the UK even called them 'trackless trams') only to then replace the trolley buses with diesel buses not long afterwards.

Now that the battery has solved the issue of the buses not being able to overtake, they're a very viable option again. Unfortunately, they require a big investment in infrastructure and environmentalists always complain about the 'unsightly' wires. You also have a problem if you have streetcars already in your city that use pantographs rather than trolley poles as collection types don't like each other.

Indeed, and replacement of the diesel busses was what edinburgh sorely needed (3 competing companies - the length of Princes Street continuously clogged with the noisy, smoke belching knackered things).

I do appreciate the higher capacity of trams and they might have the edge in terms of journey times and passenger convenience.
But I still feel that trolleys with batteries, some route prioritisation and traffic management would have got 90% of the way to the goal on about 10% of the time and money.

Instead we've spent 200% of the money to get 50% of the original promised service, with another half-billion yet to spend. They should seriously just cut their losses.

That said, it's at least vaguely pleasant to walk around the city centre now, as the 3-year ongoing disaster has meant that a lot of it is still dug up, so there are no busses at all - amazing to experience the peace and quiet!