They must be getting on a bit now. Won't it be a bit like a future-marine Dad's Army...?
Hmm. Dad's Army. Aliens. Crossover. Hmmm.....
Wilson: "I say, would you awfully mind nuking the site from orbit?"
Mainwaring: "Quiet, Wilson. Our orders say we hold Nova Walmington and hold it we do."
Godfrey: "I'd rather there not be any bombs going off anyway, I rather have a headache."
Mainwaring: "Oh sit down."
Godfrey: "I think I'll lie down. Here."
Frazer: "Stop him sir! The daft fool's laying yon-self on't table. He'll spill the porridge!"
Godfrey: "Something of a headache as well... feel all peculiar..."
Godfrey lays down on the table. He grimaces and begins to writhe uncontrolably.
Pike: "He's thrashing around!"
Mainwaring: "Stop him, Pike!"
Pike: (Shaking Godfrey feebly by the shoulder.) "Stop thrashing around Mr Godfrey!"
Mainwaring: "Oh you stupid boy, let me do it..."
Mainwaring pulls out a tazer, but before he can incapacitate the old medic, a baby alien bursts out his stomach, splattering everybody with blood.
Jones: "DON'T PANIC! DON'T PANIC!"
Walker: "Put away that guide Jonesy, it ain't helped us yet. Ere! That's some horrible beast. Look at it... poor Godfrey. To go like that. What a way to die. A moments silence for our dear departed chum... Right. How much do you think the Corporation will pay for this alive?"
Mainwaring: "You despicable man. We must avenge our fallen comrade."
Walker: "Probably be a promotion in it too."
Mainwaring: "Break out the butterfly nets, make sure you don't hurt it."
The alien leaps off the table and scuttles into a ventilation duct.
A pasty faced Hodges strides into the room. His eyes are glowing red.
Hodges: "Ere! I just got a call from Mother. She says I'm to take charge here, and I'll start by putting your lights out!"
He staggers over to Mainwaring and presses his thumbs into his eyes.
Hodges: "PUTYOURLIGHTSOUT! PUTYOURLIGHTSOUT!"
Wilson: (Mildly irritated.) "Oh now really Hodges."
Hodges rolls up a sheaf of orders and shoves it into Mainwaring's mouth.
Jones: "Never fear sir! Here's a trick I picked up when I was fighting with old Lord Adama against the chromey-womies on Nova Sudan!" (He picks up a screwdriver and shoves it up Hodge's arse. He jiggles it about.) "They don't like it up 'em!"
Hodges eyes, once glowing red, now dim.
Jones: "There, disconnected the old servo, sir."
Mainwaring pulls the paper from his mouth.
Mainwaring: (Gruffly.) "Very good Jones."
A facehugger leaps onto Pike.
Pike: "Don't worry, my scarf will protect my neck. Ooh - mum!"
Jones: "DON'T PANIC!"
Frazer: "We're doomed! Doomed! Game over mon! Game over!"
Etc.