Be Excellent To Each Other

Hale And Pace And The Stonkers - The Stonk


Mr Blobby - The Blobby Song


Poison - Every Rose Has Its Thorn (Cunt - ed.)


The Shaggs - My Pal Foot


Vanilla - No Way, No Way


NOTE - You are voting for the worst song in this group.

Fucking Hell. Tough choice.

It can't be Stonk, as it has pelvic thrusting Paul Daniels.

That "Foot" song is bad.

Hmm.

Good to see Poison here.

I had a feeling "Every Rose has it's thorn" would turn up...

Two people nominated it

They could have submitted that Miley Cirus cover version.

Aw, I was planning on doing a "pick the worst song" theme if/when I got to pick the Group D theme. Except, of course, my choices have been far too excellent for me to ever finish last.

I remember hearing a lot of rumours about that Vanilla song being part of a Chris Morris-devised hoax around the time of its original release. All untrue, it was just a tremendously awful song that sneaked into the charts when no-one was looking, though I wouldn't be surprised to find it was some kind of music 1994-Fantastic-Four-movie-type ashcan copy.

So should I still vote for my fave.... or the worst track?

Because I bloody love the Stonk.

Vanilla is bloody great, you heathens!

If there's any justice in the world then Poison should run away with this... all the others are crap, but knowingly so. Poison is fucking terrible, and deadly serious.

I too love the Stonk but haven't heard it in ages. I'd feel bad giving it any points though, it is for charity after all.

Also My Pal Foot Foot is brilliant!

Poison it is then.

Including the pleb that came up with the theme then waited another five days to submit a song.

Was I that pleb?

If so, shut fuck up

No. APoD was.

I have a feeling it may turn up every week!

And I thought Meg White was a bad drummer! The Shaggs gets my vote.

The shaggs.

Horrible cheap sounding instruments. Check.
No understanding of musical time. Check.
No understanding of pitch. Check.
No ability to play with each other. Check.

It's really, really bad.

And now it's stuck in my head. ThanThanks

The Shaggs are diabolical.

Well done.

Okay, before I open up my customary can of whoop-ass, I'd just like to ask the inhabitants of Group B how, blessed with such an awesome topic as "Crimes Against Music" NONE OF YOU could manage to pick cunting Lady in fucking Red by bastard Chris de shitting Burgh? EPIC FUCKING FAIL.
*cough*
Anyway, on with the show...

Hale & Pace - I can only think that the person who picked this was the second person to nominate Poison, and so therefore had to scart around at the very last minute looking for a replacement track. Either that or they really hate Hale & Pace. The truth is, of course, that there's really very little wrong with this track, and it features lots of celebrities looking like berks, which is pretty much what they're supposed to be there for in the first place.

Mr Blobby - Better. It's irritating and it has a thunderously annoying main character, but... it's just not bad enough. Seriously - Clive Dunn, the St Winifred's School Choir, "It's 'orrible being in love when you're eight an an 'alf" - all much, much worse than this.

Poison - No. It's a dreadful song, but it could be replaced by any number of others; Celine Dion, Michael Bolton, Achy Breaky fucking Heart. Bad, yes, but not really a crime against music.

The Shaggs - Christ on a motherfucking, jam covered submarine! What the hell is this? I don't mean to be politically incorrect here, but were they in any way "special"? No, according to Wikipedia. Hmm, apparently the big W mentions that they're actually hailed as geniuses by various people in the music industry. Which just goes to show what a shower of cunts the music industry is. Seriously, I could whack my todger against a biscuit tin lid and strategically moo for two and a half minutes and it would sound better than this. Undoubtedly the winner.

Vanilla - Good Lord. I'd like to thank the submitter of this "gem" for reminding me of its existence. Yes, this is definitely a crime against music, no matter how cute the auburn-haired one is. Two points.

So, The Shaggs win it by a mile, Vanilla take the silver medal and... ooh, I'll give the single point to blobbity blobbity blob I think.

Seriously though - no monobrowed, bowl-cutted tosser? For shame...

I thought Throughsilver would be taking part too.

Pretty much my thougts. Although I cackhandedly voted in the wrong order an put blood by above the shaggs.

In fairness though, the shaggs thought they were absolutely awful.

I'm starting to really like the Shaggs the more I listen to it.

This one especially, probably because there's no drums.

The Shaggs' song made me laugh, so I cannot vote for it.

I voted for Poison, Vanilla (that is terrible) and Mr Blobby.

Because of this, I rewatched the video. She is indeed cute... but GOOD GOD TEAR OFF MY EARS AND BURN THEM IN THE CLEANSING FIRE OF HADES

I set 'em up, you knock 'em down.

Thanks for this mental image. I keep thinking about it and bursting out laughing. My colleagues now think I'm wrong in the head, and that's without them knowing I'm thinking on biscuit tin beating.

That other Shaggs song is quite good

That's the week 7 theme then.

I actually laughed so much that I started to choke.

Dammit, why didn't someone nominate that, it would've won Err, I expect.

As bad as 'Every Rose' is, I can't give it points.

The Shaggs for 3... bloody hell. This is clearly who The Fiery Furnaces were listening to.

Vanilla for 2. Godawful.

Blobby for... ah screw it, Poison for one. At least that's not intentionally bad.

Also, The Stonk is awesome.

I've been listening to The Shaggs a lot since they were posted here. I love it!

I must admit, they have grown on me too. Not the music, but the innocence of the songs I guess.