Be Excellent To Each Other

I'm thinking that the next time I get a shitty email from some arsewipe who whinges that I haven't done something yet, I'm going to reply with nothing but a screenshot of my inbox reading "1,065 messages", and a scan of my last pay slip.

That's genius

The ladies like them. I say like, more like stare quizzically.

My next video is sure to entertain, and it looks like I'm being sexually assaulted by a middle-aged woman in slow motion. Really. It's going up tonight.

EDIT: MR KERN!

No probs. Good luck with it!

Pro tip: Asking me to scan a report and email it rather than posting it to you will not mean you get it faster. What it means is I have to take it out of the pile that I send to post every day and mark it to be scanned when I have time to find a computer with a scanner and faff about with that all afternoon. It will remain there until it decomposes in the harsh atmosphere of post-apocalyptic London.

You could have done it in the time it's taken you to post that.

Not with our scanners we couldn't. I'd still be logging into the PC.

Have we lost Kissyfur for good?

Nah. I think he's being good at work and busy at home. Hasn't been on the 360 for a month, either.

WOO! Shitty emails copied to my boss's's boss for not giving a reason for wanting time off in 12 days instead of the PROTOCOL GUIDELINE 14 even though it makes no difference to anything ever. Apparently in future I have to be sure to reply to emails that are "time driven as this clearly is". So the things I've been doing instead, like making sure we reported the right students to the UKBA before yesterday's deadline, therefore removing the risk that we'll lose millions in funding every year, making sure that the wrong students are not booted out for not paying their fees before the deadline this thursday, and making sure that PhD students get the information they need to complete their PhD theses before their deadlines, are presumably not as important as informing my lord and master why I want the time off that I'm entitled to slightly before the arbitrary notice period, regardless of whether this matters in the slightest or is anyone's fucking business.

I am this close to JC-ing this whole office.

Get on with it or fuck off!




_{edit: drat, pagebreak.}

Reply to the Boss's Boss email chain saying this, but in a bit more wordy fashion.
You want to leave anyway, what harm can it do

I think it's time to leave, buddy.

Poor SA. I wouldn't be able to put up with that at all.

I've lost count of the number of times I've checked my jobhunting email today. At this rate I'm liable to take the first half-decent offer that arrives or just throw a chair at someone. Woeee.

Fucking bureaucratic, jobsworth wankers. In the real world/private sector, no-one would give a rat's arse about some arbitrary holiday notice SA, most especially if you'd saved the company millions of pounds in the process. Shit the bed, you might even get a rise and/or recognition.

That whole attitude, philosophy and ethos is, in a nutshell, what's wrong with this country and the public sector in general.

Sorry to hear of your troubles SA mate; if it were me, someone would be wearing a photocopier right about now.

In the view of ACAS, Cavey's redundancy selection procedure left a lot to be desired ...

Metal Mickey's let himself go.

An excuse for this!

You get crap managers in the private sector too...

Malc

SA can't quit, he makes me feel better about my job!

Course he can. We have Misery Bear now.

Ooh, congratumaltions MaliA, a job! Yay!

Advise SA on how he can tell his dick employer to cock off

Happy birthday kern!

What it means this word 'recognition'? Is real?


also thanks

Happy birthday to MaliA, congrats to Kern on his new job (sub: please check).

My 25 month old daughter (well in 3 days) is sitting on my lap, and everytime I read one of Joans posts, she says: "Pepper Pig! Pepper Pig! Want Kipper, Daddy get Kipper on there".

Then she saw Grim...'s avatar and said :"What's this one called daddy? Peoples on here?"

Malc

MHRK!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34LtrnnXQTc

That's both amazing and yet somehow creepy.

To be strictly accurate, I have retired early from Her Majesty's Civil Service and am very nearly 57 years of age. But we can still be friends.

Out of interest, I looked up the muster roll of the 29th Pennsylvania (the regiment linked to above) on the ever helpful Soldiers and Sailors System. One name on the roll stuck out:

BTW - for the next two weeks they are monitoring my internet usage at work (well, the usage of everyone), so I won't be on during work times at all.

After that (as soon as I get the nod from my tame mole in HR), I'll be back.

Apologies to those who thought I might be gone for good...

I was wondering where you'd gone, Misery Bear.

interesting arrival of boxer

http://www.sporza.be/cm/sporza/videozon ... d/1.963426

Absolutely. I'm consider you a very close friend now you're loaded.

I really hope this is a spam account.

Trooper thoughts for the morning.

I'm presenting at the London Tester Gathering tonight. I should really write a presentation at some point...

I always feel sadness with a tang of amusement when walking through London and I see a single forlorn bicycle wheel chained to a railing.

Something crazy is happening, which i'm hoping is due to the antibiotics i'm on at the moment.
Everything tastes and smells much more intense than usual, the steak I had last night was amazing, even the crappy curry pack we bought from Tesco the other night tasted awesome. However everything stinks, the guy sitting next to me on the train home smelled of cheesy feet and BO, the guy opposite me this mornign stunk of coffee, the walk to town positively reeks.
Either the medication is having some weird effects, or I have been bitten by a radioactive bloodhound and have the shittest superpower ever

Have you considered that you sense of smell is becoming normal? Some people have a greatly diminished sense of smell and taste. Oddly enough, these are the people that are more likely to be food connoisseurs. Those that taste and smell with greater clarity (supertasters, the term is ) often stick to bland foods to avoid the extremes of flavour.

OMG you're pregnant!

Whoooooo, congratulations!

It could well be, i've always had sinus problems in the past.

I'm betting on now being a superhero though.

I'll call it Mimi if the pee stick has two lines tonight!

You're in London, of course everything stinks.

I'm in London most days, it's never as smelly as this.

Is it possible you've somehow fallen through a temporal rift or some kind, and ended up in London in 1858, at the height of the Great Stink? It's happened to me before, and it honked to high heaven.

You did say there's a Tester convention meeting up today though.

You should be thankful you weren't with us at the beer festival. It smelt like someone had shat their pants near us. Must have been a punter who'd been there since lunchtime. Took the enamel off my teeth.

Taking blood from an actual, real person later. Only ever done it before on a plastic arm.

It could all go horribly wrong. Fingers crossed it doesn't.

Needlephobia really does make learning how to be a doctor harder.

It will. Men always return a positive result on pregnancy tests.