Be Excellent To Each Other

And, you know, party on. Dude.

All times are UTC [ DST ]




Reply to topic  [ 35 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 12:44 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 5318
Follow these on Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/gmp24_1

Every call Greater Manchester police get is being tweeted, just to show people. Interesting reading. One day only.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 12:45 
SupaMod
User avatar
Commander-in-Cheese

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 49244
Aw. I was hoping this was going to be a twitter stream of "Mud. Mud. Mud. Mud. Turnip! SQUEEEEE! Mud. Mud. Mud."

_________________
GoddessJasmine wrote:
Drunk, pulled Craster's pork, waiting for brdyime story,reading nuts. Xz


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 12:46 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
Craster wrote:
Aw. I was hoping this was going to be a twitter stream of "Mud. Mud. Mud. Mud. Turnip! SQUEEEEE! Mud. Mud. Mud."

There's a squirrel: http://twitter.com/common_squirrel

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 12:47 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
Quote:
Call 926 report from Kearsley of threatening messages on Facebook

WTF?

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 12:49 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
There's http://twitter.com/#!/gmp24_2 and http://twitter.com/#!/gmp24_3 as well.

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 12:49 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
Quote:
Call 795 - Report of man not walking a dog in popular dog walking spot

:facepalm:

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 12:54 
User avatar

Joined: 12th Apr, 2008
Posts: 17970
Location: Oxfordshire
Grim... wrote:
Quote:
Call 795 - Report of man not walking a dog in popular dog walking spot

:facepalm:


Quote:
Call 384 - report of man holding baby over bridge - police immediately attended and it was man carrying dog that doesn't like bridges


[enter joke about comparative cuteness between northern and southern babies here]


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 13:01 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 5318
This is fascinating


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 13:38 
User avatar
ugvm'er at heart...

Joined: 4th Mar, 2010
Posts: 22393
Quote:
Call 686 man shouts 'you're gorgeous' to woman


:D


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 14:08 
User avatar
Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6612
There's a lot of cars driving off without paying for petrol.

Also

Quote:
Call 543 suspicious smell at address in Bolton


which might be a legitimate gas leak worry, but in my head is just someone breaking wind and then denying it was them.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 14:17 
User avatar
baron of techno

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 24136
Location: fife
The police clearly need to go ex-directory to avoid getting all these nuisance calls.

Seriously though the amount of silent 999 calls that have to be followed up is a bit perturbing.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 14:19 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
Dialing 999, hitting the phone against the wall and then hanging up is one of the fastest ways to get the police to your door, apparently.

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 14:22 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 5318
Quote:
call 1180 dispute over dog in Trafford


It's a Labrador!

No, it's a golden retriever!

I'm telling!

Quote:
call 1169 report of someone putting rubbish in caller's bin in Rochdale


Jesus, you'd prefer them to litter? It's a bin, that's what it's for.

Quote:
call 1079 Woman reports her horse refuses to come back over bridge


Quote:
Call 814 Call from a man who hadn't recieved his benefits


Quote:
Call 664 - Man calls to say locked out of house. Wants police to break in for him, Bolton


Quote:
Call 567 woman reporting somebody putting a video on her youtube site


Quote:
Call 466 complaint from member of the public that builders have turned up to complete work two months late in Bolton


:belm:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 14:47 
User avatar
Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 6612
Quote:
report of woman ringing police asking for help to sue benefits agency as she has no money


Quote:
member of the public in Salford complains about being woken up


God, the police have to deal with some crap.

Quote:
report of loose cows in Atherton


Quote:
a loose horse in Atherton


Quote:
further call about the loose horse in Atherton


and it's all go in Atherton!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 15:01 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 5318
Quote:
report of woman ringing police asking for help to sue benefits agency as she has no money


Been there, done that. Client/resident comes into office "I need to use the phone to call about my benefits, I've not been paid again"

Me - "fine, off you go then, 9 for an outside line"

<client dials>

"Yeah, what it is, right.... I've not had me benefits and I've got no money and I need them and I've called and been in but they're just fucking me about"

<...silence....client is listening.....and then.....>

"WELL THIS IS A FUCKIN EMERGENCY. I'VE GOT NO FUCKING FOOD. I'M SUPPOSED TO BE GOING TO VISIT ME SON TODAY AND I'VE GOT NO FUCKIN MONEY. WHY WON'T YOU FUCKIN HELP ME, IT IIIIIIIS AN EMEEEEEERGENCY"

<slam>

What usually happens then is you spend the next three hours arranging an emergency crisis loan of £20 for the client, who immediately goes round the corner spends it on two bags of smack.

I can't wait until I get another support work job :)

/edit although not now living in Wales, I pray the people I'll be working with up here don't begin every conversation, telephone or in person regarding anything official with "yeah, what it is, right...".


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 15:06 
User avatar
Excellent Painter

Joined: 30th Apr, 2008
Posts: 7325
Location: Behind you
Grim... wrote:
Dialing 999, hitting the phone against the wall and then hanging up is one of the fastest ways to get the police to your door, apparently.

When Carys was a baby, she used to regularly play with the phone. She was never unsupervised for more than a moment at a time so we usually just took the phone off her as soon as she picked it up. Early one morning I put the handset back in the cradle after she'd picked it up, pressed some random buttons and dropped the handset and started squawking for her breakfast. Within 5 minutes we had two PCs at the door asking to come in.

_________________
twitter || website
Malibu Stacy. Everybody's favourite back seat driver


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 15:16 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 5318
Quote:
update re call 1165 human excrement smeared over police car handles


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 15:20 
User avatar
INFINITE POWAH

Joined: 1st Apr, 2008
Posts: 30498
Does the (completely fucking stupid) "emergency call" thing on the locked menu of my Blackberry actually go to a proper 999 call centre? I've accidentally called it at least once a month and keep hanging up as soon as I notice. Should I hang on and apologise next time?

_________________
http://www.thehomeofawesome.com/
Eagles soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 15:35 
SupaMod
User avatar
Commander-in-Cheese

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 49244
Mr Kissyfur wrote:
Does the (completely fucking stupid) "emergency call" thing on the locked menu of my Blackberry actually go to a proper 999 call centre? I've accidentally called it at least once a month and keep hanging up as soon as I notice. Should I hang on and apologise next time?


Yes, it does. It's also an OFCOM requirement that the device be able to make an emergency call while locked, though I agree that it's stupidly easy to do.

_________________
GoddessJasmine wrote:
Drunk, pulled Craster's pork, waiting for brdyime story,reading nuts. Xz


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 15:37 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
I think phones call 112, or something odd. Same end result, though.

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 15:38 
User avatar
INFINITE POWAH

Joined: 1st Apr, 2008
Posts: 30498
Fuck, whoops. I assumed it was an Orange call centre.

Stupid, stupid bloody requirement.

_________________
http://www.thehomeofawesome.com/
Eagles soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:15 
User avatar

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 6183
Grim... wrote:
I think phones call 112, or something odd. Same end result, though.
Both end up in the same place. 112 is standard across Europe, which makes sense :)

_________________
"Wullie's [accent] is so thick he sounds like he's chewing on haggis stuffed with shortbread and heroin" - Dimrill
"TOO MANY FUCKING SWEARS!" - Mary Shitehouse


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:26 
SupaMod
User avatar
"Praisebot"

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 17094
Location: Parts unknown
Not that I want to, but how do you make an emergency call with the Desire when the screen is locked?


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:31 
User avatar
Chinny chin chin

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 15695
Squirt wrote:
There's a lot of cars driving off without paying for petrol.

Also

Quote:
Call 543 suspicious smell at address in Bolton



Bad smell man is on the scene.

Attachment:
bad smell.jpg


You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:31 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
Hit the "emergency call" button on the pattern screen.

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:34 
User avatar

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 32624
Mr Kissyfur wrote:
Does the (completely fucking stupid) "emergency call" thing on the locked menu of my Blackberry actually go to a proper 999 call centre? I've accidentally called it at least once a month and keep hanging up as soon as I notice. Should I hang on and apologise next time?
Yes and yes.

Craster wrote:
It's also an OFCOM requirement that the device be able to make an emergency call while locked
It's not OFCOM, it's part of the GSM spec.

Mr Kissyfur wrote:
Stupid, stupid bloody requirement.
Not really, not in the context of the time it was written (the early 90s). The spec writers were dealing with the very real scenario where someone who has a phone collapses and someone with no phone of their own and no other means of contacting emergency services comes to their aid. Hence, they made it a requirement that all phones must be able to dial the emergency services without the user knowing the phone's unlock procedure or being able to read whatever language the phone's menu was in. Hence, they almost all let you dial 911/999/112 interchangeably, and none of them require you to unlock the phone in order to do so.

You're not even supposed to need a SIM card, every operator is supposed to allow emergency calls from a SIMless phone. That doesn't work though. I tried it once.

To my knowledge, only the iPhone doesn't comply with this (now rather outdated) requirement -- maybe Android also.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:52 
SupaMod
User avatar
Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 69720
Location: Your Mum
The Desire and the G1 do.

_________________
Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:54 
SupaMod
User avatar
Commander-in-Cheese

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 49244
Doctor Glyndwr wrote:
Craster wrote:
It's also an OFCOM requirement that the device be able to make an emergency call while locked
It's not OFCOM, it's part of the GSM spec.


Yeah, but if you break the spec by not including the ability, who's going to tell you off?

_________________
GoddessJasmine wrote:
Drunk, pulled Craster's pork, waiting for brdyime story,reading nuts. Xz


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:55 
User avatar
Part physicist, part WARLORD

Joined: 2nd Apr, 2008
Posts: 13421
Location: Chester, UK
Craster wrote:
Yeah, but if you break the spec by not including the ability, who's going to tell you off?


Your mum.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 16:56 
User avatar
Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 49362
Location: Standing on your mother's Porsche
Your face is breaking the spec.

_________________
SD&DG Illustrated! Behance Bleep Bloop

'Not without talent but dragged down by bass turgidity'


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 17:13 
SupaMod
User avatar
"Praisebot"

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 17094
Location: Parts unknown
Grim... wrote:
Hit the "emergency call" button on the pattern screen.


I don't use the pattern screen, I use the swipe down method and there's no emergency call button on there.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 17:14 
User avatar
Noob as of 6/8/10

Joined: 6th Aug, 2010
Posts: 5587
Location: , Location, Location.
GovernmentYard wrote:

Been there, done that. Client/resident comes into office "I need to use the phone to call about my benefits, I've not been paid again"


Oh Dog, I remember when we had to stop calling them 'claimants' and had to refer to them as 'clients' instead. What we called them in the back office was often not repeatable.

Quote:
/edit although not now living in Wales, I pray the people I'll be working with up here don't begin every conversation, telephone or in person regarding anything official with "yeah, what it is, right...".


Or worse, 'What it is, is .....' Mind you, half the staff in Openshaw UBO used to start their sentences like that in 1972 as well.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 17:15 
User avatar

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 8655
TheVision wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Hit the "emergency call" button on the pattern screen.


I don't use the pattern screen, I use the swipe down method and there's no emergency call button on there.


Then your phone isn't "locked" in this sense of the word.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 17:16 
User avatar
Part physicist, part WARLORD

Joined: 2nd Apr, 2008
Posts: 13421
Location: Chester, UK
Joans wrote:
Then your phone isn't "locked" in this sense of the word.


I thought Android was open? :smug:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Pigs go tweet
PostPosted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 17:20 
User avatar
Noob as of 6/8/10

Joined: 6th Aug, 2010
Posts: 5587
Location: , Location, Location.
Squirt wrote:
Quote:
report of loose cows in Atherton


Caller subsequently prosecuted for bestiality in a public place.


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Reply to topic  [ 35 posts ] 

All times are UTC [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Malc and 0 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search within this thread:
You are using the 'Ted' forum. Bill doesn't really exist any more. Bogus!
Want to help out with the hosting / advertising costs? That's very nice of you.
Are you on a mobile phone? Try http://beex.co.uk/m/
RIP, Owen. RIP, MrC. RIP, Dimmers.

Powered by a very Grim... version of phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group.