Be Excellent To Each Other

I never formally introduced myself and just started flinging opinions around instead. I think I'm kind of familiar to most people already. Anyway.

I came here by way of Doctor Glyndwr on the recommendation of the lovely Fanny Stupid. My name is Annie. I attempted to be cool and say I don't really care what people call me, but then I was threatened with the nickname "gropecunt." So I really prefer that you refer to me as Annie, shoesonwrong, or shoes, I guess. I lurked around here for several months before I decided to jump in. I'm sarcastic, opinionated, and not easily offended unless you are asshole who doesn't agree with my opinion.

I'm from the United States -- Detroit, Michigan, to be precise -- so you guys start posting around here hideously early in the morning from my point of view.

Um, hi, I guess. As you were.

Hello

Well hello! Again! You're settled in nicely now anyway, aren't you? Seems that way to me.

Who came up with gropecunt? That's fantastic.

What happened to that other lass who takes photos of her feet in pubs? Am I getting confused, that wasn't you was it, Annie?

'gropecunt'

That was going to be my first child's name.

Welcome outsider. We have other odd timers here too. A few yanks and a some ex-pats positioned in key strategic points provide around the clock fun

The other girl was a redhead from new York. Kim I think

A belated hello.

Well, it's not taken - so if you want it, gropecunt....

Malabar Front is the brains behind of "gropecunt," as I recall: viewtopic.php?p=439277#p439277

You're thinking of someone else, I guess. I don't take photos of anything in pubs. It would require that I let go of at least one of my drinks.

And I believe it was our very own emo cyborg, Mallowbar that came up with that particular nickname

You can blame this for the Gropecunt name. I'd stumbled upon that page, and bringing up Fanny Stupid reminded me of awful nicknames one could earn around here.

Anyway. Welcome, Annie

FTFY.

Hello and welcome! Have you bought Minecraft yet...? Maybe you shoud have a wee read at that thread...? JOIN US!

Hello Annie

And welcome, of course! I was understandably distracted by the whole "gropecunt" thing. To look at innocent young Malabar you wouldn't think he was such a filth monger.

Talking of which, I have to say, I clicked through to your website (I is well nosey), and on being confronted with what appeared to be a little logo picture of an evil geisha and a large photo of a woman recently exited from a shower, worried I'd accidentally landed on something a bit ... specialist, and panicked. I clicked through a bit more and found pictures of cats, and all was well. It's a legal requirement for women to have pictures of cats on their blogs, isn't it?

Look, can we just pretend the Alan Wake thread never happened, ok?


Is there a right and a wrong way to wear tissue boxes as shoes? Because I think you may just have solved your shoes on wrong problem.

And yeah, hi

Evil geisha? Goddammit you're right and now I will never unsee it. *sighs*

I think Mr Chris has just fainted with shock at having someone agree with him...

Hello Shoes. It strikes me that for someone who would presumably class themselves as adult, having your shoes on wrong would be something you might look to address for the betterment of your education. Have you considered evening classes?

Welcome.

Hello! You'll probably bump into me late at night, as the two of us wander aimlessly round the forums while everyone else is asleep. Don't worry, I'm a perfect gentleman.

S'up Shoes.

Hello Shoes When did you last put your shoes on wrong? i was about 10 years old and sitting staring at my feet, crossed-legged in a school assembly when I realised that I had two different shoes on - one was brown and one was grey.

I'm not telling you this so you can laugh at my stupidity, no, I'm trying to explain the reasons behind my long list of problems having stemmed from the abuse of being bought brown and grey shoes when all my friends had normal footwear.

Also, I read your thread and tried to reply and wasn't logged in. I then spent five frustrating minutes trying to work out why it wouldn't let me log in here before I realised that i was typing 'Shoes' into the name field

PS - the shoes were identical apart from their colour. Oh, look at these ugly shoes - let's get Mimi those in brown and grey.

Don't be so ungrateful, there's poor people in Africa wot would love to have your shoes.*


*to gnaw on for nourishment, obviously... their feet are plenty warm enough to go barefoot

Who scared off the boozy floozy from NYC then?

Wasn't me!

Welcome, again, boobsonwrong.


_{Oh damn.}

It's nothing new. Americans always seem to barge their way in and then introduce themselves

Nice to have you here.

JC has been to America, you know.

I'm an intelligent and capable adult, but shoes have long befuddled me. I used to put my galoshes on wrong then cry because they wouldn't come off. I once managed to tie my own shoelaces together on accident and gave myself a shiner when I fell over as a result. My shoe-related idiocy was frequent enough that my mother used to ask me before I left for school, "Shoes on wrong?"

It hasn't gotten better with age. I've painfully jammed flip flops onto the wrong feet, worn mismatched shoes without realizing it, and my ski boot once got stuck on a chairlift as I was getting off and I was dragged about ten feet until the operator stopped the lift.

First laugh of my day, that.

Welcome Annie.

In the grand scheme things putting your shoes on wrong is not exactly life threatening, but just enough of a flaw to not make you stand out amidst this feckless clumsy bunch. Consider yourself successfully integrated.

My four year old daughter is worthy of your name. She insists on wearing different coloured crocs as she is currently (well the last 6 months) obsessed with "things that don't match".

Welcome.

Hi shoesonwrong.

No idea who I am but glad to know a little about you.

Hello there.

I am Malicious Afterthought. Mighty Space Pirate (retired) and King of Awesome. I'm also an excellent cook and gardener.

Hello again. You know me. I have a lake in me, a stair and an entrance to Moria.

Lo, Shoes. I can't think of anything witty or clever to say, but Craster's thing about evening classes made me laugh, so just pretend I said that.

Surely

shoesthenwrong? You are a silly man.

Hello shoes. I like your style.

Apart from wearing shoes wrongly.

But other than that, your style = good.

Right.

Ah, school assemblies.

I sat down for assembly in junior school once, and noticed a weird bulge in my lower right trouser leg. I managed to fish the thing out, covertly, and realised it was my underwear from the previous day. Hmm.

And then there was the time I split the side of my trousers and spent the whole day with my arm conspicuously by my side, covering the enormous hole. I didn't think to seek help, through fear of embarrassment.

And then there was the time everybody had the foresight to bring wellies to school to play in the snow. Not me. The teachers gave me some carrier bags to wrap around my shoes.

Father in law delights (where delights = tells everyone at the first opportunity)in the story of my arriving in Buxton with only my pair of plimsoles on my feet and four inches of snow on the ground. He stood in the doorway and said "You won't get far in them, lad," shook his head sadly, and walked away.

I bought a pair of boots the next day.

I can't remember if I said hello before or not, so I'll say a belated hello just in case

I bet you read for fun.

She's American so she'll have a pet Mexican for those things.

Hello. I had no idea we had to do introduction threads. I think I've left it a bit late, to be honest.

Welcome, Nik!

Hello! I once put a t-shirt on backwards...

Still here?

Tripped over her own feet trying to get to the keyboard.

She's been at the big Chicago Twitter meet all weekend, with many other people including Danielle.