Be Excellent To Each Other

Intelligence from a far off place suggests there is something we need to investigate.

Rules:

Anything over 250cc is cheating, larger capacities allowed with a sidecar.
Anyone breaking down will be left with food, water and a service revolver to do the decent thing.
The BeExpeditionary force will infiltrate the country 2 days prior to the festivities and exfiltrate when necessary.
Self sufficiency is a must.
Bring firewood.
And beer, lots of beer.


Gentlemen, that is all.

Bikes?

First Hurdle fail.

I'll amend the rules to make it bikes with a sidecar.

Not sure I understand what's going on. Is it just a bunch of bikers going camping in the snow?

I saw motorbikes, beer steins, snow, Spaniards and tents. I'm thinking I like what I see, but I'm also kind of worried by it.

You all remember what happens when you go biking in the snow.

With beer. And stuff. We need to do this on unsuitable IntracontinentalAttacBikes. Bring beer and firewood.

What's wrong with just going for a normal rideout on our existing bikes and then retiring to the pub afterwards?

(sighs) this is why the empire fell, you know

You going to buy me a 250 so I can comply with your silly rules?

How about This for a mission instead?

Land's End to Dover via Manchester is a rubbish idea compared to the proposed BeExpeditionary force to Southern Germany in the snow to drink beer and show the Bosch what we've got, old boy.

At least my idea is something I'm actually willing to do. Go and spend time sitting with the bally Hun! Pah!

Also, there's considerably more chance of being shot up in Manchester, and I don't speak northern.

That does concern me. Getting to Leeds by 9am would mean leaving here at 4am, and that's 300 miles under my belt before the thing even starts. And then another 300 afterwards when you're done. Two nights in a hotel in Leeds, looking out the window at your bike hoping nobody nicks it.

Also being smeared with semen.

I saw that story on there yesterday, alongside the headline for another story - 'Sick Cowell pulls out of Talent'. I think they were unrelated. Maybe.