Be Excellent To Each Other

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/7429638.stm


Mudkips my arse, yer name's Smith, Dave. Smith.

Actually his name is Gaywood but the BBC changed it to avoid offending the daily mail.

MOHH OMLO

Whee!

I cannot think of many places I'd rather not be than on the underground. Around a load of drunk people, with tube trains around you? I don't think I'd feel safe at all.

London: Still full of tossers.

Still, I'd have been there, if it wasn't for the baby. Looks like a right laugh.

I don't think I would have enjoyed it. Especially after last time I was drunk on the tube. That, and I don't really do crowds anymore. And it seems like the kind of thing that wacky students would do.

I never got to be a wacky student

This womans expession made me laugh;

No idea what this means. Is it welsh for "titty fuck wank!"?

Everybody there looked thoroughly odious. "Oh look Mummy, something is about to become illegal so lets prove why it should be." Deeerrr.

WPC on BBC news 24 was pretty.

Hehe, quite.

Oh, that was @ Craig. I didn't see the pretty police lady.

I think shooting yourself in the face should be publicised as being illegal, because then hopefully these twats would all get together and solve the ongoing problem of their existance.

Alternatively give me the gun, I'll shoot you.

Do you do private work Comical?

As long as you provide the gun

I don't think a BB gun would work too well.

What about a Nerf gun?

Do you remember the Kangaroo Court bit of Amiga Power? One of the punishments was instant Nerf gun execution. Having no idea what a Nerf gun was I seemingly misread it as Smurf gun and have been repeating that phrase to much silent laughter. It was only recently I realised my mistake.

Tsk.

If only those bombers had waited a few years, eh?

*picture of cleaning contractor, with a feathered head-dress, crying*

Whyfor? I've seen worse on the Circle line.

I was going to say - surely there's more mess than that?
If mess was something they were worried about they'd have banned newspapers long ago.

Nah, I've seen more mess than that too (although the bits of the tube I use regularly are pretty decent). It just seemed like a funny image in my mind.

I'll not point out that on the MTR in Hong Kong, they ban drinking and eating of anything. And it is the most spotlessly pristine public transport system that I have ever had the pleasure to ride. 24 hour ticket, all zones, all lines for less than £3.50.

And what do we have - a bunch of people going out to get pissed and ride the trains. FFS.

Pah! To you boring so and so's.

If I would have remembered about it I totally would have gone, but I was down the pub. Gah silly me.

Marking the end of an era is always good. And besides in this day an age of THE TUBE MAY EXPLODE AT ANY MOMENT OMG PANIC worry I like the idea of people getting pissed on the circle line.

When the smoking ban kicked in I was very very happy. Didn't stop me taking up smoking cigars for an evening. It was an awesome and memorable night because of it.

Minus the actually smoking.

They can't stop me.

I'll just have to go for vodka in a mineral water bottle.


Heh, reminds me of the time I snuck alcohol into the O2 wireless festival, I had got free tickets to go to two of the 3 days, first day with a couple of mates, 2nd day just me. It's not an alcohol free festival, but they want to force you into paying their ridiculous prices, for a limited selection. I decided I was going to break the rules.

First day, I got a bottle of vodka, got a loaf of sliced bread, took off the end slice, and hollowed out the middle, inserted the bottle, and put the end slice back on. When I was being searched, they asked "why have you got a loaf of bread" I simply replied "I am meeting my mate inside, he has some peanut butter". I held onto it, so they didn't notice the weight. This technique is called the "lucky loaf"

Anyway, whilst there we bumped into the event coordinator, a very friendly woman, around 40. Me and my mates flirted with her for a bit, and got into the VIP area instantly (it was free, but you were supposed to queue up for a wristband), in there, we got chatting to a bunch of the O2 staff, and they agreed to pick us 'randomly' to go up on the O2 bus (and get free drinks and a good position to see the bands).

The next day, I turned up a bit early, since I had nothing else to do, I had a load of alcohol in bags, but was planning to befriend some randoms, and just get wasted before I went in. However, I saw a bunch of guys with big cameras walking in early, they had black wristbands on (I still had my navy blue VIP wristband on) so I followed them, assuming I would be asked for my ticket. No one asked me anything, I just walked straight in the press entrance, and hadn't even used up my ticket! I phoned another friend (who loved massive attack but had never had the chance to see them) and she met me at the gate. I gave her my ticket, she got in for free too!

I then went to the VIP area, with my big bags full of alcohol, and the event coordinater saw me, so came over to say hi, and offered to keep my booze in their fridge, and let me come and get it as I pleased.

I love festivals so hard.

Have they subversively melted that particular quote?

They should ban the Metro newspaper. Do you lot have that in non-Leeds?

Yup.

The best underground train thing is in St Petersburg. The trains arrive every 4 minutes IIRC. There's a giant clock at the end of the platform, I think it's calibrated in "time until the next train". Generally looks like the original film version of Metropolis.

They have sliding doors on the platform which open at the same time as the train doors (this seems remarkably sensible, especially in St Petersburg where everyone seems drunk and suicidal a lot of the time).
Also, at the bottom of one of the escalators, a bronze statue of Lenin offers his hand.
It is ace.

Some stations in London have those doors.

That bread trick is frickin' GENIUS. You truly are king of all bargains.

I get the idea of having a one-off party before the drinking ban, even though it ended up being the perfect advertisement for why they wnated it instigated in the first place.

However, the wacky crazies apparently now want to do it regularly.

[deadpan]Oh, they're fighting for my freedom. Hurrah[/deadpan]

London Police FTFY

Yeah, we got so many laughs of people we showed it to once inside.