Be Excellent To Each Other

I'm officially sick to the gills of her, her face, and the way everybody humps her dry and calls her amazing and beautiful and brilliant and Teh B3st Thing Evar1111oneoneeleveneleven. I've had enough.

She was previously just "one of the girls (aloud)" before, yet since becoming (ugh) a Cole, she's been whoring herself on every stretch of the country and gleefully having the media follow her every lark and whim just because "she's Cheryl! Off the telly, innit?". Nadine and co. might as well rename themselves "Cheryl's Band", serious to lordy. I still recall the Coldplay Wembley reports from a while ago - the day after their first night there - and guess who got top prominence in the photos all round? No, go on, guess. I'll give you a clue - it certainly wasn't Mr Martin.

It's not like I can just avoid all press about her during the autumn/winter period either - she's mentioned literally every month of the year, if not every week. Everywhere I go I see at least one magazine with her smug, twatty face on it, or one newspaper discussing the latest "exciting" piece of (ugh) "gossip" about her. To top off the start of a depressing week for me, I read today that her godawful single has already sold over 130k on her first day and is likely to end up selling a gajillion, bagillion, multimegawillion more by the end of the week. And all because of yet another overhyped OTT performance on That "Entertainment" Show From Hell, which also seemed to work wonders for Alex Burke, but which only goes to prove that A Good Portion Of The United Kingdom are hopelessly WEAK and are incapable of making their own minds up without a TV show dictating what they should high-five and buy accordingly. The thing is, it's working even stronger for Cheryl, which just goes to prove how depressingly mired and drowned in "Cherylmania" this dog of a country has become.

So here's to Cheryl Tweedycole - an unbearably smug, odious, greedy human being who deserves to be first up against the wall alongside Cowell in my idea of A Better Britain.

Although I expect tons of people to slam me down with claims of "epic wrongness" or some other such gubbins. Sigh.

Come back Sharon, all is forgiven!

Massive LOL at LaceSensor's report of the opening post.

You really can, you know. I'm genuinely not even sure that picture Grim... just posted is the lady in question.

Share!

Which seems invisible to me?


To be honest, I thought it was Kimberley Walsh at first. It's almost as if Cheryl is trying to steal her identity or summink.

You can't get away from stuff about her, so you've written about her on a forum that you visit regularly

It's a report. Only moderators get to see reports.
Well, them and the SEKRIT FOROM POLIZE!

I could've perhaps used codenames so as not to promote her on here, but then frankly no-one here would know what the fuck I was ranting on about.

She is hot, though. But out of them all Kimberly is the one I'd most like to bang.

I don't much care for her, the only place I see her is on Xfactor (which I only watch cos the kids and misses like it). I don't really see a problem with her.

I think the problem you have Marzykins, is that you seem to spend too much time around other "pop" stuff which is naturally going to include a popular (DYSWID?) "pop" personality.

Malc

Well, I think Grim...s last picture wraps them it up perfectly.

Cheryl Tweedy/Cole would first up against my wall too, but for very different reasons I'd imagine. Yum.

Oops sorry. Saw the first post, expected the report to be something along the lines of "Goes too far, how mean, etc etc"

I don't find her that attractive, tbh.
Obviously, she's not bad, but you can take pretty much any "okay"-looking girl, cover them with expensive makeup and give them a good bra and a good haircut and ta-daa - fox!

Well in the absence of some sort of charity going round doing exactly that, she'll do for now.

I'm enjoying this thread. I don't mind how many of you slag her off as long as I keep getting pictures of her. I have a bit of a crush on Danni Minogue as well, that's terrible isn't it?

All this because she hasn't replied to the letters you sent her, even after you proved your love by signing them in blood and sealing the envelopes with your fluids.

She looks like Ed Byrne.

one thing I'll say about her though...

she's proved that a racist white woman and a gay black man can overcome the odds and stay married.

She is kinda cute...

We can let Mali have teh undead/ginger one.

He can fuck right off.

[edit]Bollocks, forgot a picture.

Grim..., you do realise I can just block all pictures from my side, right?


Also, I'm going to predict that Sunday's show will feature a smug, back-slapping, tooth-shining moment when Cowell announces to The Nation that Cheryl is #1 in every single chart in the world, ever. Upon which the woman's head will explode out of sheer squeeness.

You wish.

I'm pretty sure they're for the rest of us right-thinking people.

Will you read your PMs please?

Exactly.

My only interaction with Tweedy is this thread and if she pops up on Harry Hill's TV burp.

Start reading better newspapers/magazines and start watching better tele.

Maybe you should write some torture fanfic Marzy.

Her single has sold over 120,000 units in a day which means she is heading for number one.

Looks like she smashed it!

I already mentioned this in my initial post. And highlighted the ridiculousness of it all.

Clearly the single is not selling on its own merits, but on the old-fashioned "It's 'Er Off The Telly Innit" gimmick.

Seeing as the group and her were discovered on TV... well yes..

I think we should stand by Cheryl and help Marzy see the error of his ways. We got to fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love.

I think we should stand by Cheryl and try and cop a bum feel.

Actually it seems that a lot of people on Digital Spy really like it.

Not my cup of tea but I had a listen to her album earlier and it was better than I expected. Unlike Alexandra's which bored me to tears.

Yes I have too much time on my hands.

So you guys have never been bored to tears by the media shoving certain people down your throat every waking week?

MarzSyndrome, you are my new hero!

I don't watch primetime TV or read shite newspapers, so no.

What about The Internets?

This is the first time in a long time that the internet has mentioned Cheryl TweedyCole to me.

Doesn't get boring if they're tottylicious.

Also:

Stephen Gately?

"Hello Cheryl."

"Hello Marz."

"Say hello also to my big - I mean little - hammerfriend."

*pulverizes her with giant comedy hammer handled with ease like Cloud Strife And His Motherfucking Sword*

The End

His media star will only shine for a couple of weeks or so in light of certain circumstances. Cheryl's manic followers will insist on fanning her whoring flames for as long as possible, even if to report on pithy non-news.

Aye, you might be right on that. I hunted it down on YaTube & it's a bit shit by any standards. Also, where's the hook? It's meant to be a fucking pop song.Nah, I don't bother with the papers anymore. They make me worry too much about the state of the world & that's kinda bad for your head. RSS Readers are the way forward, that way you can pick & choose your news.
Mines is made up of; The Torygraph's weird section, Odd Science sites, the local astronomy club's news, Celtic news, Ayr Utd news, Tech Blogs, Music Sites/Blogs that talk about stuff I like/might like, Attenborough's life podcast, some webcomics & a couple of photoblogs.

& on the rare days where I'm too hungover to play games & end up watching telly (rather than specific programs) I just change the channel to something I'm interested in or watch a DVD.

Mrs Tweedy yesterday :

Watched a bit of the old Xfactor, so can;t complain really, and just seen her in a shampoo advert.. thats about it..

I don't see her all over the media Marzsydrome. I suppose it depends on what media you take note of. If it hadn't been for all of Grim...'s pictures I wouldn't have known which one of girls aloud she was. I only know of one of G.A. and that's the ginger one, and I know of her only as 'The Ginger One'.

There's probably an easy way to avoid seeing her. Avoid tabloid newspapers, look towards the counter and away from the side aisle at Boots (which is the worst place for being bombarded with pictures of Fern Britton, etc on the front of rubbish magazines). This way you can stay as blissfully ignorant as me. All I know of Cheryl Cole is that she is married t Ashley Cole, and someone said she was racist. I didn't realise that Tweedy and Cole were the same person until this thread.

All over the radio. And all over popbitch.

She's even more annoying when you can't see her.

See /\1ßî/\0, proper Northern she is, an nor mishtake.