Be Excellent To Each Other

The Sun has discovered that Poundland is selling porn films and children could see them.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/2584392/Poundland-porn-films-slammed.html

However later on in the article you find that the DVD's are housed on shelves 1.5 metres high and are rated 18, not the higher R18.

So basically Poundland are doing what every VHS hire shop did in the 80's. 18 movies on a high up shelf.

Meanwhile The Sun continues to put badly airbrushed bimbos with their tits out on page 3 every day. Busty Dawn (19) says "This quote was invented by some sub as I'm paid to show my tits and think what Rebecca Wade tells me".

I saw these in a pound shop once, I intentionaly moved some to a lower shelf.

Also bought a copy of Junebug on DVD, lovely film (music by Yo La Tengo <3)

Edit: for a pound.

[LOVEFiLM'd]

That's Rebekah Wade to you.

Or, "Rebekah Weirdy Wade" as she's more properly known.

So is this Poundland porn any good then?

From the stuff I've seen in my local Poundland, it appears to be 'Electric Blue' type stuff. I'll stick to buying my jiffy bags from there I think.

Penthouse mostly, so plackky wimmin rubbing their bellies for 55 minutes.

My childhood local video store 'Mr Video' did proper porn, but up on the very top shelf. I used to stand pretending to choose Nintendo games but in fact squinting desperately at the covers trying to spot some minge or it going in. Then the stench of stale popcorn (which hung over the place like death) would overcome me and I'd just rent Rad Racer or Mighty Bomb Jack again.

I went to school with a lad whos parents owned a paper shop. He would rob loads of (mostly hirsute) late 80's porn and "rent" it out to us. The amount of times i would pay a pound for a mag for a week to find the pages with the least troglodite, hairy bushed, big haired totty pre-adhered together was vast. I had to do my dirty solo business over the picture of them in the contents page most of the time.

God bless the Internet.

Who allegedly threw her "hard man" husband out after catching him in bed with another bloke. Didn't read that in the Sun did we...

Oh ho! Really? I bet he's a popular bit of light relief out in Afghanistan then.

Do people still actually *buy* porn then? Or is there something more satisfying about having a physcial object to wipe yourself off on? I suppose the curtains get a little stiff after a while.

I think it was Lady Droman who brought this to my attention, but apparently the workers in Poundland pronounce it to rhyme with England. Like it's a country.

That's not cool.


Yeah - it's your mum.

To be fair, the porn in question was just a plain pink cover, with a fairly innocuous title.

That makes it more likely that some small kid would accidentally read it.

Not cool.

Do you put the first porn mag back on the shelf, try looking at another, find you can't reach it, and then go back to the first one, only to find you can't remember where you put it?

Back when the Spice Girls were in their heyday - 1996 or so - I was in my local Post Office, just checking out all the mags there. They didn't do porn there, it was a Post Office, not a seedy newsagent after all.

I would only have been 12 or 13, so I was primarily interested in the computer games mags of the day, I probably picked up Gamesmaster or something to have a leaf through.

While scanning the racks, a mag on the bottom shelf caught my eye. It was a Spice Girls mag, clearly aimed at young kids as it had a free Spice Girls pen on the cover and big garish colours and graphics. It also had "GINGER SPICE'S NUDE PHOTOSHOOT" or something like that on the front cover.

Intrigued, I picked it up and had a leaf through. True to it's word, on the centrefold pages was a big feature about a nude photoshoot that Geri Halliwell had done prior to joining the Spice Girls. To say that everything was on display would be an understatement.

I distinctly remember being shocked that such a magazine feature would have been allowed in a mag aimed at kids. Didn't stop me buying it though

Blimey!

True, though.

I am aware of those pictures. She was sat on a tree for a few of them, wasn't she?
She looked rather good, IIRC.

I love Ginger Spice. She made the 90s all yummy.

Yeah, them's the ones.


Yes, she did. Especially to my 12/13 year old self

How does the song go? "It's just porn, mum, it won't go away, you wouldn't believe what the kids see today".

#Grab your dick and double click for porn, porn, porn# (SFW, involves muppets).

LNK PLZ KTHNX

I refuse to believe there's anyone who hasn't seen those pics.

Me.

Or that spectacularly bad at working a search engine.

FTFM

I saw some of the topless ones from Turkish telly or whatever it was she did before.

Link - NSFW

The little blowout circle is hilarious. It needs an exclamation mark next to it.

Stupid forum. Where's my post?

edit: this one's fine. Here you go, anyway:

Link no workie.

Aw. I can't find another source, either, and I can't be arsed uploading it somewhere myself.

It's Geri Halliwell, topless, soaking herself with a hosepipe. In the bottom corner is a badly blown-up closeup of a single boob.

Why would she be doing that? Is it hot outside? Has her shower broken?

I assume she is washing off all the men.

No, the rain was later. After she left the "band".

Not quite what I meant. Gentlemen's leavings rather than gentlemen themselves.

That is two most excellent puns I've made that you lot didn't appreciate.

Stony ground around here, I can tell you.

Casting mock pearls to real swine?

Nah, more like telling great jokes to people who aren't clever enough to appreciate them.

I can't believe that has happened in this place even once.

I saw a Yugioh! version of this ages back and wondered where that came from.

You know I'm far more concerned about kids getting hold of all the horror vids' they stick up around Halloween, than any of this Sat1 style filth. I'll have to look out for this the next time I'm buying crisps in there.

If you haven't seen Avenue Q (and this goes for all of you) get yourself to the theatre and see it. It's buries everything else I've seen on stage - it's superb.

I brought the mag Gerri was in. I think it was Playboy? or was that for Cindy Crawford? Might have been Penthouse then.

Yes, she did look pretty good in the nod. I was dissapointed however that she didn't have a ginger minge and was actually dark haired.

It was the ginger that I found attractive, so that kinda ruined it.

IMO her finest hour was in the video for "Say you'll be there". Also their best song IMO. God she looked so incredibly minxy and sexy in that video though.

EDIT : Just sat and watched the video for the above on Youtube and cripes, that's virtual porn. She just looked utterly yummy in that video.

And crivens, who can forget this little number?

I try to, but there's moments when I wake up screaming.

ITT: board reaches new lows.

Time to shut the board down folks. We're officially now gayer than Popbitch.

As the saying goes "If you can't beat em, join em". There was absolutely no way we were getting rid of the Spice Girls so hey, may aswell cop a free nonse out of it.

They looked like dirty, slutty slappers. Poific.