Be Excellent To Each Other

So. The new Alli Diet Pill (Daily Mail, sorry) is causing a stir at the moment.

They work (basically) by making it hard for the body to absorb fat, causing it to simply be crapped out. The idea is nothing new, and pills of this type have been around for ages (as have their opposites, such as Creon). This one is less 'powerful', though, and so it can be bought at Boots.

I'm not against it, though. If someone wants to take the side effects to lose weight, let them. It doesn't bother me none (unless I'm sat next to them on the train, or something).

I had a colleague who took this stuff. I have no idea why.

Anyway basically you shit all the fat out and it's not very nice.

I've linked to this a couple of times, interesting to see it actually on sale though.

What fun - lets all start CRAPPING OIL.

A colleague of my mum was on a sort of these pills. She used it as an excuse to eat as much crap as she liked.

They ended up having to call out the plumber to her place of work, as there was a load of congealed fat stuck in the drains.

4 Realz?

I know someone who's on them (the stronger presciption type)

Yeah, even though it doesn't really work if you do that. If you eat low-fat stuff you get no side-effects at all.

What's interesting is that they almost use the unpleasantness of the side-effects as a way to train the patient into eating less healthy foods. As a medication it tries to force you to change your diet rather than actually just 'making you thinner'. Of course, blocking the fat absorption helps, but it's almost an afterthought.

Quite. It's meant to be a deterrent to eating fatty foods. I've heard shitting out pure fat is quite unpleasant.

Does it block all fat?

As I am sure your body needs some to operate.

Either you've got that wrong or my brain is broken

Fatist.

Nope. Not even the hardcore ones do.

They're what the docs got me on, the high strength type. After a couple of weeks to sort yourself out, you don't crap bright orange oil any more - unless you eat the wrong stuff, but then that's your fault. Don't often have a very solid poo, though. Normally on the runny side.

It must be hellish to wipe. Mr Muscle could make a bog roll to help with the degreasing.

Could the fat be used as an alternative car fuel, Kalmar?

This is already a fantastic thread.

@Zardoz: it would almost certainly run in a diesel engine, yes. The exhaust aroma might be offputting though.

eek, is that healthy?

As in, no - it doesn't block all the fat. I wasn't talking about hardcore bodies


Are they working, weight-wise?

My wife has to take the anti-version of these pills, because she can't absorb fat very well.

this thread is making me sick. Thanks myp for the nice story

No need to thank me; I like to share. Ask Zardoz about colostomy scars and old ladies with spoons.

It's giving me the boke, but I keep coming back.
The smell wouldn't be too bad provided you had a clear run so you could fire it oot behind, be rank rotten if you got stuck on the motorway in the height of summer though

I can picture people refueling on the hard shoulder now.

See if you tried to top yourself using the car exhaust, would you be more likely to die from asphyxiation or choking on your own vomit? (Bugger off pedants )

I've lost about 20 kilos since September, so they don't magically transform you into a thin person overnight, but it's a nice steady weight drop.

Wow. 20 kilos is, pardon the expression, a crapload.

That's about three stone in old money, right? That's quite good going.

That is very good.

You've crapped out a 4 year old since september

Can I ask if you think you'd be able to manage without the pills now, now you've got used to a different diet?

Glad to hear its working Rev Owen, and delighted to hear it's a gradual process. Heaven forbid it instantly made you shit out all the fat in a short time.

In a 30 second explosion like a deflating balloon, for example.

Thankfully without the teeth and bones.

How I read it.

God. What an image. Leaving a Rev Owen shaped pile of lard in the bowl.

A shit husk

I honestly don't know. Sometimes I do cheat a bit, but the orange poo punishment stops me from cheating again for a good while.

Why is this not used instead of ASBOs?

Glad to hear it's working, chap!

I've had alot of experience with this shit (note the word shit) in the USA. Having sold many of these through the company I used to work for.

Firstly, the fat blockers are nothing new. The yanks have been trying to use them for years.

Yes, they do allow your body to pass some of the fat from the food. The problem is however that fat people have stored fat and it does nothing for that. They may regulate your fat intake but at the cost of your metabolism saying "right cunt, the next time you eat fat without one of those pills I am having it all"

It's very similar to diet drinks. Your body will eventually take the sweeteners and store them as sugars. So they really aren't all they're cracked up to be.

Other forms of so called wonder diet pills include.

Houdia. It's some sort of cactus extract that apparently makes you feel full and thus lessens the ammount you eat.

Green tea fat burning formula ! Apparently give you loads of energy and suppress your appetite. All they really are is lots of caffiene and B vitamins that give you an energy rush. Which is good, because then you're prone to want to do more and excercise. Sadly your body works that out too and will 'crash' and then your metabolism will yoyo and you'll just been tired and put on more weight.

So called miracle cleanses that contain no laxatives . However, when you research what's in them you find that cascara sagrada and slippery elm bark are nothing but natural laxatives.

IIRC the pills being sold here now are called "beta blockers" in the USA. They're just as shit there too.

I'm crying Snake Oil.

Quite!

Beta blockers are used to stop the production of adrenaline, I thought, although I wouldn't be surprised if they had some horrible side-effect that helped with slimming.

http://www.dualactioncleanse.com/default.aspx

One prime example. Meet Klee Irwin

The man who makes a pill that apparently cleans your skin and makes you lose weight.

So, why does he look like a crater faced cunt with jaundice?

I've met him, and yes he really is a complete sleaze.

We were asked to be 'his audience' over a new miracle herbal drug for diabetics. All it was was a capsule with liquid cinnamon in it.

When I asked him what it actually did to lower and regulate BSL's (blood sugar levels) he said.


"That's a good question XXXX !!.. Does my hair look good? did you get that shot O.K? can we roll back a minute?"

Totally and utterly avoiding the question I had asked of him. Because he couldn't answer it.

He sold another product too that supposedly boosted your immune system. The 20 min radio ad was nothing but scare mongery over BN51 bird flu (that the country was in a panic in at that time) and how this pill may possibly supposedly stop you getting it.

Libido Max ! is the funniest one ever. It makes your cock bigger and turns you into casanova

Total twat tbh.

Might be a product of the same name.. These things were supposed carb blockers that did exactly what the ones here are supposed to do.

They didn't work either.

Didn't amphetamines work quite well as diet pills (with some minor side effects obviously)?

Yes they work very well until you get bone marrow cancer

Again, those were being sold over the counter in the USA. California banned them first then the other 47 lower followed suit.

http://www.banital.com/Default.asp?bhcp=1

There you go, another one I used to sell.

And yes, the double your money back is a complete fucking scam that involves you having to go to the doc and getting yourself weighed about ten times. Thus, the copays to see the doc is more than the product so noone bothers.

The rows I used to have to have with disgruntled customers

I know that there's an urban myth that ecstasy (a form of amphetamine) was created as a diet pill, but that's not actually true.

Are you sure on this, as diabetics can drink as much diet drinks as we want..

IIRC it was developed as a marriage councelling pill to keep people together. It worked too

Until you get cancer.

I thought the *real* urban myth was that ecstasy was created by the CIA as a truth drug.

Or was that LSD?

Yes, it was LSD.

Shush, me.

isn't that warm diet coke... I don't drink a lot of pop.. not a big fan of anything fizzy other than water.