Be Excellent To Each Other

Turns out that other people in the company don't work in IT, and as such aren't interviewed by me.

Oh. I thought she was a nerd and therefore I could relate to her on some level and therefore be in with a chance. I was going to fly to London in my Space Shuttle for the date and everything.

A number of IT men I work with would have a cracking cleavage with a decent bra on.

Hairy though

In all honesty, I have never met a female with any level of programming skill, which is odd.

Heh.

On my graduate application to a large multinational insurance firm (several thousand people applying for about 2 jobs) I answered almost all my questions irreverently, for a laugh.

My 'taking charge' example was about getting my lazy friends to go to the pub quiz via an ingenious use of flipcharts, with the reward being that we won the quiz through teamwork.

My 'innovative solution' example was based around playing hockey for a team with only a couple of good players, and using the tactics of having one in defence and one up front, with the hard workers in the middle. When attacking, we bypassed the midfield by thwacking it to the good person, and when defending the midfield just ran around a lot, leading us ultimately to a creditable second place in the tournament.

Both are wild exaggerations, but I did get the job.



Alternatively, ask Bobby, as he has a degree in the same kinda thing.

Haha! fair enough, I spose out of thousands of apps sticking out like that would show you are a bit of a character and different and shit.
But there are probably a lot less people going for the jobs im going for (around a hundred or so maybe...?), Ive tended to use academic examples like blah blah blah group work blah, and heavily exaggerated my position on the chemical engineering society in my 2nd year and what I did there... but still, bullshit is bullshit

I was at a barbecue with a female computer programmer on Easter Monday. I have no idea if she's any good though, as it was the first time I'd met her - it would've been rude to ask.

MaliA FTFY.

I went to uni with a few, they were Chinese people who had come over to learn English while getting a qualification in something they already knew about.

I once replied to the question: Name three things which have developed you most:
1) Being born
2) Puberty
3) While wandering around the amazon basin, I happened across a tribe wandering Gypsies, I was captured by them and they force fed me heroin. I managed to learn the language of the beasts and used a monkey to open the cage and escape on the back of a panther. I have since escaped the clutches of my heroin addiction, but am still scared of gypsies.

I didn't get the job.

Eurgh.

I'm interviewing someone in an hour and I'm going to have to sit through HR asking numerous questions like this for half an hour before I get a look in. And if past form is any guide, the answers from previous questions will have no effect on what subsequent questions are raised.

Indeed. Almost all law firm training contract applications have questions like that, and they are stupid and hateful and require you to tread a fine line between taking poetic licence with something you did to make it fit and lying.

I got the application forms for MI5 a long while ago, and they have questions like that too. Worse, however, they ask for two references who can verify each answer.

I fucked *that* right off, I can tell you.

I got the job in now because, after I listed all the websites I have made and all the things I did for my previous company on my CV, I made a one-sentence comment about doing some DJing in my spare time.

/shrugs

Employers do seem to really love it if you have a decent hobby. I mention my guitar-playing and gigging (even though I don't do the latter anymore), and they seem to lap it up.

I suppose it shows that you're a well-rounded person and not just some computer nerd.

Interesting hobby we got from one of the potential trainees we were interviewing a while back: "shopping".

Riiiiight.

I work with a woman who is a project manager, she has to take a second job because she can't manage her personal finances properly. Would you employ this person as a project manager?

Nik, make sure you mention the frisbee on your CV. It is great in an interview as no one knows the rules so you can spend a few minutes explaining it and interacting with the interviewer as a human rather than a candidate.

Indeed, the three most regular questions I get in interviews tend to be:

1 - UK National Junior Frisbee Champions? What the hell is that?

2 - You say you do writing? What kind?

3 - Could you please put your cock away?





Okay,

3 - You took a degree in Physics, was it hard?

Terrible, terrible interviewing technique. Nothing says "I don't know what I'm doing" than reading out pre-planned questions and never deviating from them or asking followup questions.

Best interview advice I've ever heard: every answer tells a story. It's not "I am good at X". It's "this time, something went wrong, and because I was good at X I fixed it really quickly". It puts a human face on what you are saying, prompts questions, and puts some flow into the interview. People like stories, it's a basic human fact. Often the interviewer is no keener on the process than you are, and making it easy for them by being personable and funny wins points, no question. I've made my interviewer laugh in every job interview I've ever had. In total, in twelve years, I've had 11 interviews and scored six job offers. Not a bad batting average, I reckon.

Taking this to extreme: decide in advance your best stories, and simply contort your answer to fit them in. Works more often than you'd think. Politicians do this all the time.

Second best interview advice (for technical roles): demonstrate commercial sensibility. "this time, something went wrong, and because I was good at X I fixed it really quickly and that saved Y amount of money because Z customers weren't annoyed". So many technical types are head-down focussed on technical issues, they forget the firm is there to make money. Demonstrating you are not that is invaluable.

I would say what Doc G has just said is particularly true if you are going for a grad role, as they are generally recruiting for future multi-skilled roles, team-leader, PM, etc, as opposed to a straight technical role. I would personally look more to personal skills more than technical skills for that sort of role, as I can train someone in the technique I want, but if they are a cunt, there is little I can do about it.

Ive got im a drummer and skier on the CV. Im not gonna put pro CoD player tho.

I got an email today saying I've got to do an online assessment for Atkins. I spose that's a start if I got that.

No, because that would be lying.



Furthermore, when asked for examples of you working in a team, do not include the time you killed Bobby for a laugh, to stop him calling in a helicopter!

That never happened! He had the chopper, he just didnt realise!

Did online assessment for Atkins,

I presume that means I did well enough on the initial app.

But the assessment was pretty horrible, why were they asking me finance and economics questions on the numerical assessment

Look out for questions relating to Achievement Orientation, I'm trying to answer one now for a post and it's driving me insane.

Serves me right I suppose, I haven't had to touch an application form for the best part of ten years.

Achievement Orientation... that sounds horrible!

Dimrill is an expert at it.

arf!

Woo! Got a rejection email from P&G today

I just got asked this
WTF? Have I missed something, because I don't have a clue!

By seeing who baulks at splitting the cheque equally and doubling their salary.

EDIT - also, er, fuck knows.

the only thing I can think of at the moment, is by asking who has more than X, less than Y type questions.

Malc

If this is maths, so far I'm stumped. If it's a stupid interview type "think outside the box" question where you have to rely on them, say, counting up through possible averages and using a blackball-type approach to anonymously declare themselves higher or lower then I'm not interested in solving it.

I have the damndest impression I've seen this before somewhere.

Everyone sticks as many pennies or matches or something as thousands of pounds they earned into a bag unseen. The bag is then emptied out and counted up.

Average away.

Mr Russell's thinking>>>>>>>>>>>>>
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<Box

I suspect this is right, but that's much less fun for a huge nerd than a mathematics question.

Well, that was the first thing that came to mind.

And yet I work in a shop. One day I'll apply for a decent job.

Heres a solution although who knows if its acceptable or not - i really get annoyed at some of these 'think outside the box ones' when you do and they say "nah - thats not the answer on the paper so your wrong"

You need a calculator

Banker 1 puts a fictional number into the calculator , then adds his own bonus and passes it to number 2 , who just adds his bonus and passes it to number 3 , etc etc
When it gets back to number 1 he takes off the fictional number he first entered and whats left is the total of everyones bonus.

Another good, and possibly more accurate, answer.

Well done chaps.

If you don't want to assume they'd have a calculator in the restaurant, a pen and seven pieces of paper would do just fine.

Long division... by SEVEN of all numbers?!

I love your high opinion of their basic arithmetic skills. I've known investment bankers who had to use calculators to do three digit additions.

sweet!
Phone interview with RB!

Bobby can you give me any tips?

Don't call them "donkey fucking shit eaters"

Unless RB actually stands for Rampant Burros.

I'm afraid it doesn't




But that's what it says

Nice one. Do you know anything about the role? Is it the Grad Recruitment role? Is there a specific field, I am guessing pharma-goods?
Do you know who will be interviewing you, and from which site?
Do you know where the role is based, even?
General Tips:
Find out as much as you can about the role in advance.
Ask questions in the interview which clarify what you have found out. Respond to the answers they give and ask further questions.
Don't be afraid to be silent - this can be very difficult in a phone interview!
Don't be afraid to ask for clarification on anything, plus this can give you thinking time.
Don't insult anyone/play anyone down, in your answers - normally the ones which go give an example of when you have had to overcome adversity..., big yourself up, but try not to say things like, "I managed to work with X, even though they are useless git."
Try and think up answers to a load of stock questions in advance.
Sound interested!

RB Tips:
[caveat]It has been 5/6 years since I worked for them, in ther Hull R&D site[/caveat]
Used to be Reckitt and Colman (as in Mustard) but they split and Benckiser merged/bought Reckitt. They are a huge company and you can see an entire ad break with just their products in at times. Check out their product range on their website.

They sell products to the states, therefore they have to be compliant with the Food and Drugs Administration (FDA). The legislation which applies is called CFR 21-11, this is about data auditing/tracking and is vitally important. Without this compliance they can be stopped from making sales to the States, and the FDA can pull the plug instantly if they want. Not sure if things have changed, but I had never heard of any of this when until I left uni, and it is pretty damn important. Obviously there is a whole load of British legislation which applies as well, but everyone uses CFR21-11 as a benchmark now. Might be worth finding out a little about it.

They like innovation, sounds obvious, but still, they sent everyone in the company on innovation training to aid in product development.
They like to be able to apply technologies from other product lines to each other. Eg, the piezoelectric spray things in those Glade plug-in things, were developed for drug administration, or something like that.
I would say that that is possibly the main aspect for a GR role, as you will be passed through various departments and they expect you to learn from them!

When is the interview?

Edit: shit, that is easily the longest post I have ever made!

I applied for "sales, marketing and R&D grads" so probably hull I'd presume. Dont know when it is yet, they said they'd call me in a couple of days to arrange one. And I dont know, the email was just from "emma@something" and the one saying they recieved my app was from "alison@something" so probably just some HR girls at the moment.

I had to learn about the FDA for my design project last year, but we didnt go into any details on any of the actual legislations and stuff, so I'll peek into that, and bone up on things they sell and stuff.

Innovation will probably be a tough one if they ask for a time when Ive done anything innovative...as I don't think I can remember any in my formulation experience anyway... but I'll try and blag something.


Ta

I wouldn't necessarily expect you to be able to give examples of innovation, but it is something to be aware of, and maybe comment on, difficult to say really, but forewarned is forearmed. It may be something you could ask about even, eg, "Oh, do you use this technology anywhere else in your product range/any plans to do so?" something like that, maybe. Also, innovation isn't always an exceptional thing, for example, if your reaction vessel broke and you used chewing gum to fix it, that's innovating, not necessarily correct, mind. Which is something else to bear in mind, don't get carried away with talk of innovation, they will want to see a well rounded person, not someone who flies by the seat of their pants, day in day out.
One of the main FDA audit targets in the lab I worked in was a methadone substitute, Buprenorphine (Subutex), as an opiate, it has to be controlled pretty stringently. Might be worth looking into.

If I think of anything else I will let you know.

Thanks again

And also thanks for pointing me in their direction, if it all works out a beer will be coming your way somehow

Now your talking!
Hope it all goes well, unless they have changed drastically, they should be a great company to get a GR role with.

After forgetting to get back to them Ive got a chat with the reckitt recruitment people tomorrow, and a phone interview with atkins next week.

2/3 phone interviews isnt bad