Be Excellent To Each Other

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/7909561.stm

There's a feedback form at the bottom, top marks to anyone who can get one published. My actual name is a contender for long-windedness if nothing else, but I've regaled them with "Warren Peace"'s tale of woe instead, let's see if they bite.

I've seldom actually encountered any genuinely lolsome names, although an intercom summons for "Adam Hussein" at my local supermarket turned a few heads.

"Dr Doctor? Can't you see I'm burning, burning?"

"I can, but you'll be wanting Mr Fire Fighter, next door"

Hmm. So it's a blatant advert for "thebabywebsite.com" on the BBC.


Still, perhaps Dr G could mention his Xbox banning

Heh, well, I submitted myself.

Dick.

"Dr Doctor, give me the news... I've got a bad case of lovin' you!"

Joking aside, I once knew a girl called Carrie Vanner.

At my work, there is a Tossaporn Legpetch and a Ping Pong.

I often spend entire days just typing names into the directory.

We've kinda had this before on Live chat...

My Wife dealt with a Mia Fanny Foulds and my Father in Law had an Orson Cart on his records

Over to you MarkG...

We have an installer who calls us regularly named Kamal Banger.

He goes by "Kam" as much as he can. As you would.

At work we have a Milan Hilton - presumably we couldn't afford Paris.

There was a girl at uni called Jennifer Cundick.

Great if you have a juvenile sense of humour (like me).

He must really get the hump.

I have to meet these people. Do you need any emergency Graphic Design work?

This is where I mention the kid at my school called Drew Peacock.

That's actually a worse name than Kamel Mustafa Kamel, and that guy turned out to be a terrorist or something.

Our email system decided to quarantine emails from a Miss Fullalove last week.

When working at a bank, I served a Mrs Mycock. Whilst her first name wasn't 'Ophelia', I do recall it being somethign else amusing. Sadly, I cannot recall what exactly.

There was also (allegedly) someone who ran for office in Staffordshire called "Ramon Mycock", though I suspect he was a joke entrant.

His name and demand.

"And what's your name, sir?"
"Kamel Mustafa Kamel"
"Steady on, sir. I will check the availability for you in a moment, but I must have your name first."

Three brothers/sisters at my School were called Sky, Blue* (both girls) and Day (a boy)

Malc

*Blue was once used by Paul Daniels in a trick on the TV

I had a Primary School assistant called Mrs Fullalove.

School teacher called Mrs Manhood, and our form tutor was Phil Mike Hunt.
Ramon Mycock is a real person, I have seen his Life Assurance Policy.
I work with a Dick Payne.

I had a maths teacher called Michael Jordan. Which isn't funny until you learn he was a short fat, balding, white dude. And he loved to play basketball.

I went to junior school with a Elvis Ardon.

However, this reminds me of English Lit classes in high school. The head of English in our school was called Mrs Matthews but her nickname was Old Ma Beetle as she drove a clapped out sky blue VW - she wasn't that old, allegedly, but had aged dramatically when she lost her husband and son in a car crash. Anyway, she was a bit fausty and strict and she made us have a reading list, which was a notebook we had to list the books we'd read and their authors - this used to get collected every couple of weeks and we were expected to have read at least a book a week. It became a running gag about silly book titles and authors though I don't think anybody put books like Gunfire by R Tillery in theirs. My friend and classmate decided he would add one such book to my list, unbeknownst to me. Imagine my surprise when I got called to the front of the class to describe the plot of The Tiger's Revenge by Claude Balls.

I know a guy called Albert Square. Someone who works in a hospital has told me they have colleagues named Dr. Funk and Sister Fista.

No one ever believes me (and quite frankly, I wouldn't either), but when I worked for a pensions provider I once found a policy for an ex-services gentleman with the name of Major Richard Head.

There's an Anil Chung here..

Used to have a client called Eric Hunt at the accountants where I worked.
Used to work with a bloke called A. Ness.
Also B. Oddie rang me at a Travel Tavern once.

That must have been me, it was Sister Pfister though.

My favourite has to be one that someone else came across at work, Judith Priest.

Hah, because of that I've just "got" a joke that's in a book I read about 10 years ago (The Broom of the System by David Foster Wallace). One of the characters is called Judith Preitht.

Not funny for the same reason as you guys' suggestions, but there's a guy who used to attend Bisley every year for the shooting called Major H. J. Orpen-Smellie.

One of our maths teachers was called John Thomas.

I imagine they'd believe you if you could back it up.

Noone mentioned Air Chief Marshal Sir Jock Stirrup yet? For shame.

YEAH!

How about Irma Peedo?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7909407.stm

Shit, that reminds me - in a news article recently they had someone called Peter Fyles. Can't remember where though, but I thought it was either made up or very very unfortunate.

Oh, my brother knows a Summer Salt, too.

Man, Rock Salt would be an awesome name.

Are you sure it wasn't the IT Crowd episode?

Ooh - mustn't forget Olivia Bumgardner.

No no, it was this week and I was on the bus so it was quite probably Metro. I do remember that IT Crowd episode, and had heard/seen that joke before then anyway.

The IT crowd is good though.

It was certainly in Brass Eye.

At work we have drivers called Ronald McDonald and Tom Bone. Last one's a bit tenuous but it amuses me.

Oh, and I once had to call someone called Dustie Binns, and I've known 2 girls called Jenny Taylor.

One of the best things about being a teaching is the names you get in the class. you have to be careful when you get students to write their names in the first lesson (because there isn't a register), becaue you get the usual Ben Dovers etc. as a joke. But Wayne King and Umar Butt are genunine names I've come across.

Don't get that one...

Genetalia.

Ahh.

Genitalia even

better than odd genitalia

Meat x 1 + Veg x 2 = 3

I'd rather have odd thanks.