Be Excellent To Each Other

Still looks as incredible as ever, even with one Jubbly.

Thankfully the world's most beautiful bottom is still present and correct.

The three of them made a rubbish job of presenting, don't you think?

It felt rather scripted. And Joey C is still making his "first time in a while I've been in front of a crowd without some guy trying to kick my face in" joke.

I didn't think she's had a mastectomy?

No, there definitely were a couple of tits on stage with her.

Don't let facts spoil JCs opinions

I can never understand why they always have one or two professional presenters back stage (Fearne Cotton, this time around) and some people who have never learned to read before running the actual on-stage presenting. Those two guys off of Gavin and Stacy are comedians, right? or comedy actors? Gosh, they were awful. So... laboured...

She's got the arse of a small boy. You like looking at that arse, you like looking at small boys.

At least she didn't sing "I Should Be So Lumpy".

That's better

They are just actors. Actors who think that because they have been in a successful comedy, they have suddenly become comedians. This is akin to Jonathan Ross convincing himself he can hold a candle to a professional standup because he was on "They Think It's All Over".

The skinny one is a DJ now, too. I fucking hate the idea of getting a fashionable face off the TV to play some records (badly) and calling them a "DJ".

Isn't Kate Lawler a superstar DJ now though? Apparently she's quite the talent.

'Fran Cosgrave' however?

She was a radio DJ first, and she's (apparently) quite good. I've not got a problem with it if they've got some skill.

Half the people in the appers that are either ex reality tv stars or knobbing them are "DJs" or "Producers" nowadays.

That fat guy writes the show, though - you'd think he at least had a sense of what was funny. I think you do have to be funny to be a comedy actor - you have to know when to give weight to a particular statement, understand timing very well, understand why something is funny, but they looked like two blokes off of the street. I wondered if they were drunk. The Brits is ALWAYS embarrassing.

I've met James Corden and the other bloke who looks like Charles Gray's son and to say that success has gone to their heads is an understatement.

Charles Gray yesterday

And god you're all right, it was a clunky humourless affair wasn't it.

I didn't see the Brits, but, Gavin and Stacey?
Well.. it's *not* funny, at all, is it?

I'm sure I remember seeing one episode of it once a long time ago, where it was just Rob whatsisname driving around in a taxi, moping about his failed marriage. That was quite good, if not exactly laugh-out-loud funny.
But apparently it's still running (even though one season of 6 of that original concept would have been quite enough) and it's mutated into some horrible sitcom with catchphrases and dreadful characters. Horrific. Glad I don't have a TV etc.

Aha, aha, aha ha.

No.

Did I tell you lot the story about Kate Lawler trying her hand at standup and asking for a gig at XS Malarkey?

G&S is incredibly funny.



And that's Marion and Geoff



G&S is filming season 3 IIRC.

I don't really like Kylie all that much really. Plus she's got really creepy bony veiny old lady hands.

So, to summarise: if you like Kylie, you like creepy old women and small boys.

I've not actually seen it, but many people seem to think it's fantastic and they commissioned a second series.

Oh, hold on a minute, they said the same about Little Britain and Catherine Tate, didn't they?

To be fair... she is in her 40s. I think she's holding up quite well.

It's very, very good. The first and second series. The Xmastide special was a bit crappy though.

I watched the first Episode of G&S under protest. It was meh. It's all a bit grimy and uncomfortable.

In one of the dresses she wore there was definitely a boob missing.Looked like the left one.

But tbh it didn't hinder things any, her face is still cute as a button..

And that bum. Oh that bum... In Streetfighter it was the only thing to rescue the worst film ever. That bum in those tight leggings she had on as Cammy.

It's odd really. In Neighbours I thought she looked scraggy and I hated that perm. It was all about Beth and Jane then. But now? Fucking hell.

Me & Mum are big fans of Gavin and Stacey. And I find 'that fat bloke' hysterical. Esp when he gets all posessive on Gavin.

One of the funniest scenes ever for me was the one where him and that enormous ex of his (who hate each other) are @ Gavin's parent's house and they go outside to argue and come back in with dirty knees. I was pissing. Good show.. Not as good as Benidorm but good none the less

I've never liked Catherine Tate, but I thought series 1 of Little Britain was quite edgy and subversive. They got rid of all the best sketches for series 2, though.

I saw a bit of a random episode, and you've summed it up perfectly there.

If we're going for ex-Aus soap star Top Trumps,

Naalie Imbrugliugliugliuglia>>>>>>>>>>>Isla Fisher>>>>>>>>>>>Kylie,

And Isla can't even sing.

Oh god, the very thought of that program makes me retch. And want to firebomb ITV.

Aye. Nat was on there last night. For the first time since I can remember she actually had a feminine hairstyle too which was awesome. She looked alot more like Beth than the boyish shit popstar she made with the baggy cammo trousers etc.

But Kylie just shone. As the years have caught up with all the others they seem to have passed by her. Even with a boobie gone she was just glowing from head to foot. In the same way that Amanda Holden does. Drool.

Johnny Vegas for prime minister.

Oh do fuck off you tiresome child.

Easy, Dav.

Apologies Cras.

Pardon?

Amanda Holden is a harriden. She was mean to our Les.


Also - I've got some pots and kettles lying around if [anyone - ed] wants to roleplay with them rather than post it on here.

Kylie had a lumpectomy/partial mastectomy where they removed the lump from her breast - she did not have a whole boob lopped off.

I went to a fancy dress party once with a pot on my head as I wanted to be a knight, but couldn't find a hat in time.

I thought you looked 'pail'. No, that doesn't work

I like mean birds. The really spiteful ones. They're great in the sack.. Useless for anything else tho.

Let's face it. Wor les is a ginge and she's hot fanny. At least he got a few good pokes in, and, might have even done her up the bum. So he gets the last laugh eh?

/WACADAY.

She's got one boob boober than the other. That's for sure.

Good for a jolly good fight if you're mean to them. And for complaining in restaurants.

I think that is really rather disrespectful towards women.

I don't believe you are a real person John Coffey. You sometimes come across as a shallow parody of a 'type', but not a character. I never know when to take you seriously or not, and it usually ends up with me taking nothing you say seriously because of it.

And taking your clothes back that you're too scared to 'cos they don't fit.

Yeah, you know what man you're totally right. I kinda missed being chastised. And I never saw myself as one of those blokes who would do anything for a quiet life.. But then you don't know what they're getting in the bedroom, it's probably worth it.

Which is a nicer way of saying what I did, further up the page.

edit: that was @ mimi

That's fine Mimi, honestly.. /really crushingly normal mode on...

Over the years I've been seriously burned by the internet and being too honest and 'me'. So I don't take it very seriously now at all..

I have a really stupid, silly and childish side to me. I don't know whether it comes from the Autism or what, but it's there.

I just like to have a laugh is all. Even if it means being a complete wally and never being taken seriously. I think many make the mistake of taking life way too seriously, so I can see why I would annoy people.

I started dealing with death at a very very young age. Not the "ooo love your granny died today" and that's it, but real deaths that were close to me and really affected me. In the end I just chose to shut it out and go hell for leather to be stupid and have fun. I faced my own mortality at a very young age and was ran over by a car. It almost (close but no cigar LOL) killed me, and I suppose since then I just don't take anything seriously and act stupid.

I do have a good heart (honestly). People who really know me know that. But I'm so paranoid about 'letting go' on the net and really being myself that I tend to totally unknowingly act very confusing and throw out really odd signals.

For someone who repeatedly says you don't take the internet seriously, you seem to get easily riled/upset by some people on here.

Do I?

And how do you know that? This is exactly the reason why I have been evasive and stupid. Because the internet is something where people just can't help building mental images of people. Maybe that's why I act stupid somedays and 'pretend' to be all serious the next.

Without watching me go about my day to day life the fact is you have no clue about me other than what I choose to tell you, or let you know.

Trying to gauge someone's temper levels through text is pretty much impossible.. I'm a pretty complex person yes, that's for sure. But I certainly don't get riled or upset. If it ever came to that there's a power button, or the X on the top corner of IE.

I do say stupid things that come out as rude/sexist/arrogant and whatever. I know this. That's why I went to the psychs and started having sessions to find out why. See, for years as a child they 'thought' it was all down to the shock I had dealt with as a kid. And that it was perfectly normal for me to do those things because of the mental trauma I had suffered. But then with the years came the reality that things had not improved or gotten better. Thus, there was something wrong. And it turns out that by me being in a state of admital (if thats even a word) and wanting to get help and actively seeking it I found answers to the questions I had been looking for.

Why do certain things make no sense to me? why do I prioritise certain (stupid and pointless) things over the real pressing issues? Why do I laugh at funerals?

As I say. Humans are very complex. Some are more simple than others but still very complex none the less.

What it all boils down to at the end though is I am me. This I know now. I talk too much, I bunny on and I say stupid things. I'm childish. So shoot me I suppose.

It's not something I have control over. Hence being diagnosed mentally ill. Maybe you have never met any one that is mentally ill but at the same time 'mostly' 'normal' (if normal even exists). Usally when someone says "I have a mental illness" people say "aww, there there, wipe the drool from his chin". But as time goes on as a human race we are beginning to realise that there are other mental illnesses that people can have without running around going "boolalalalalala" and having multiple personalities etc.

I have met other people with mild autism. They weren't as honest as me, maybe because the world is very judgemental. Me? I don't give a fuck. The first thing out of my mouth is "Look, I have Autism and bipolar. I can and will make no sense sometimes. I can drift off into a trance and be thinking about cows in fields, etc, but that's who I am"

At least I tell people. Can you imagine the complete cunt I would look if I went about a day to day life pretending everything was ok and that I was completely normal?

Most with mental illnesses do. Too stubborn to accept, too stupid to look for help. The latest pills I am on (Risperidone) are pretty fantastic. They make me chilled (well, alot more chilled than normal) and I get more done (I can concentrate more).

They don't perform a lobotomy and change who I am and how my brain works. Not that I really want them to. I'm happy with myself, something that's very important. I have visual defects (one of my front teeth has been broken in half since I was 18 from a fight with my brother) and I have left it. I'm not vain, I'm not good looking. But I'm happy and I don't want to change that.