Be Excellent To Each Other

I have no idea what to do this Valentines day. Lucky for me to some degree is that my lady is off on Work/Holiday this Saturday for a week, so I should be avoiding expensive meals/drinks and the likes. But I will have to do it earlier and she does like the idea of everything being expensive as it seems to add to the romance (for some reason). So assuming you're not a loner:

What is everyone doing?
What is guaranteed to make your special one happy?
What in the past has been the best thing you've done for Valentines?
Is there anyway of doing it cheaply?
Is this a specifically a male providing the gifts thing? If not, what do the ladies do for their men?

My default has always been Card, Flowers, Meal and Wine.

Gooo on share the love!!!

I'm going to send Kovacs flowers. And presents.

I'll get her a card and I'll cook dinner. The fact that I always cook dinner is neither here nor there.

I would also welcome ideas.

You must buy a card at least, don't not buy a card!

Go out for a meal, or make something nice at home.

We don't bother with gifts for each other these days.

Not doing anything special, and I've told her well in advance. She shares my feelings of it being a pile of shit.

Not sure why I need a day to be told "Spend money on someone else." I already do that on Christmas and Birthdays; I'm not whoring myself out to another meaningless date. And I already do that whenever I feel like it, anyway. I don't need telling.

Thank you...


We have booked a meal, at the local Thai Resturant.

The subtitle should be "What are you doing for it, GovernmentYard?"

I've usually cooked and bought flowers/wine etc, but last year we had a role-reversal. She'd been off sick for seven weeks with a poorly knee and I'd been looking after her, so I got wined and dined instead.

itsallwater, you could spend a million quid on your missus and she'd still find something to pick fault with. Do it on the cheap.

I will be cooking my wife a simple, but delicious meal in our brand new kitchen. I may even buy her a card and a bottle of wine. Check me out.

Heh, losers. I'm single and will die miserable and alone, I beat you all.

The last time I shared VD with someone, so to speak, was about four years ago. I set up a treasure trail of Valentine's cards throughout the house, each containing a clue leading to the next, and ultimately a hidden gift (some stupid tiny pink MP3 player she was mad keen on.) Was well received.

What do the ladies do for the (*fingers crossed* fe-)male in their life? So far it all seems a little way.

They cook and clean and wash for the other 364 days a year. Or, at least they should... if they don't, you can write VD off.

Mine bought me Dexter S1 last year. She's such a romantic.

Wishful thinking... for me anyway! I am always thee bastard for the other 364 days

When we were both working I did half the cleaning and most of the cooking.

Obviously now we've got kids she does almost everything and I do nothing much except earn money. Which isn't as important, clearly.

The wife is not a fan of VD, but she wanted to go out for a meal, so we are.

Don't do any of the other shite, she thinks it is a waste of money

Oh hey, maybe mine will buy me Supernatural S1.

Soppy Alert: I'd do anything for the missus. I'm a pretty bad cook but I make the effort a few times a year. I know valentines is a crappy commericial entity and abhor the whole Hallmark nonsense, but it's nice to make an effort. Besides, it's a saturday this year, so full day 'at it' is on the cards. Woo and indeed, Hoo!

off topic.... isn't S4 great so far!!

It itches, for one thing

I was hoping for "Naked Ninjas 5".

Then it should be a day for her to lavish you with gifts and blowjobs.

1) Supernatural? Why does she hate you. That show is poooooooooor.
2) Going out for VD is madness. Do something on another day.

Also: Don't forget the male version of VD. Steak and a BJ day! (March 14th Date Fans).

wrong, wrong and more wrong. I think it is really funny..

It's highly entertaining. Also I think it was perhaps a subtle hint for me to return Grim...'s S1 DVD boxed set.

I went for the even less romantic approach of downloading it all.

I am not allowed to download any thin that can be slightly ilegal, as the wife is doing her police assesment..

I think I'm gonna get Mrs Squirt a screwdriver set for Valentines Day. We really need new screwdrivers - our old set were really cheap and I've trashed the heads on all the posidrive ones.

I've only just realised that that also stands for Valentine's Day.

That was for Xmas, you bought me CSI for the xbox for VD.

Anyway, this year I have been given a 13 month subscription to L!ve(thank you Joansy! ). That might sound strange to some, but anyone who knows me knows I think that's acebest(I know devilman will be chuckling at his screen when he reads this).

As for ideas... I would normally point you in the direction of my website, I'm doing gift boxed stuff, but it's down at the moment *scowls at devilman* I have PDF copies of stuff, but I don't know if I can can upload them on here, I can email them out if anyone is interested, just drop me a PM.

I shall be in Bulgaria getting drunk with friends and ogling lovely Bulgarian ladies. Luckily they don't have any truck with this Valentines nonsense over there.

I'm assuming that they *do* have truck with ogling Britishers?

Depends if you get caught mid-ogle.

...before a price has been agreed.

Sweet.

Do I need to wear a shirt?

No, a skirt.

I'm considering ramming my point home in both senses this year by having us both cuckold the other simultaneously in the same room. Bloody fuck valetine's day, it's a load of old fucking shit. I know loads of ugly single people and it makes them feel like right cunts and they don't deserve that, they're already ugly, ffs.

I hope whoever invented it gets a prolapsed knob.

POTW there, chaps.

We should all print it out and show it to the other half, too.

See? I'm fucking right. Anyone who has ever had a boring night too many at home with the missus has no business making a fuss on v-day. The very notion that being especially romantic or giving or pathetic as a special annual occasion is ghastly. Do those all the time, it makes for a much nicer relationship.

I'll buy my missus a curry, download her some shitty film or give her a back rub when she's had a shit day, not when it's February 14th and the card sellers need a new porsche. Sainsbury's had these wicked cute valentine's hedgehogs a couple of weeks ago, so I got her one and gave her it immediately so as not to taint the badass hedgehog with v-day skank.

Wait. What? Valentines hedgehogs? Seriously?

Don't even start.

Shall I post a pic?

That sounds fucking awesome.

Please do!

Hint: if you find it squashed in the road, the relationship is over

Yep. Vagehogs.

Best valentine-related thing I saw was a card with fake blood spattered all over it - something about picking roses and the thorns involved. I can't remember buying any since then though.

I feel roughly the same about New Years Eve. Celebrate because an arbitrary point in a counting system has just passed! And it's the same with NYE TV - if I'm sat at home by myself on NYE, I don't want to watch other people have loads of fun. I want to watch Das Boot and get drunk on cheap scotch.

Go out and buy an AR-15.

Be a hero.