Be Excellent To Each Other

Mate, I hope that all of this went okay for you and you had a "things are tight but we're hanging in there" type consultation rather than the "thanks for all of your hard work, much appreciated and all that but here's a box for your things. Oh and would you mind bringing it back as someone else might need it soon"

Fingers crossed for you and all other folks here

Yolks?

Also, what he said, Bluecup. Best of luck with it tomorrow. How have they split you into groups? Is it like, your entire part of the firm is going in the last session, or has it been assigned across groups?

I know someone who worked for Gamma Technologies in Newport who had a company briefing like that. The email that went around split the firm into two groups for meetings, at the same time, in different rooms; one upstairs, one downstairs. The downstairs people were made redundant

I wonder if they knew which group it was before the meeting or if they just tossed a coin outside.

Thanks guys.

I think I'm just getting worried over nothing. Hopefully it will be a "we did bad this year, must do better next" type thing. And/Or that they had to cancel the Christmas bowling and lunch day. Or they are having cash flow problems and we aren't getting paid this month....

Looking at the groupings, there isn't much to worry there after looking at it closely. It's just roughly divided up into departments (So Sales and marketing, Customer Care and warehouse staff, along those line). So that's better I guess. Also no one else seems worried (unless they know something I don't of course )

However my manager won't say anything about the meeting, the company has got a history of laying people off in the past and the email didn't have an agenda. So I'm going to say I'm paranoid but with good reason. The place is too damn secretive for it's own good.

It could be bad news then, but I think that makes it less likely to be outright redundancies. If that was the case you would more than likely be grouped by staying/going, which would cross business lines.

Sounds like the whole dotcom thing all over again. How many of us went through all that mess.

Companies living the dream one minute, and folding the next. There was a story on Popbitch about how one dot com purchased a load of inflaitable furniture (desks included). The problem came when their flashy new Macs arrived (top of the range G3's or whatever it was then). The desks collapsed under the weight of the monitors. They were returned in favour of laptops.

But it's a wierd old week out there. No sales enquries again this week and everyone seems abit gloomy. No doubt the media are stirring this up and making it worse than it is.

Had the meeting and it turns out I was being paranoid. It was mostly "lets go into defence mode but don't panic" talk. I am feeling a bit silly now but why they couldn't announce the meeting last week with an agenda I don't know.

Although the annual pay reviews in January have been cancelled until July depending on conditions then. To grumble or not to grumble?

Also they didn't cancel the Christmas party. In fact it might even go on for a hour longer

I missed that one, and I hadn't exactly noticed much in the way of champagne and bonuses before this crash.

Mmmm. . . .well here goes. Myself and the PA have just been asked to stay on a bit to have a meeting with the two directors because "there are some business things that we need to talk about."

Director No. 2 is on his way back so I'm sat here like a limpet wondering what's going on.

FTFY. Or "defined benefit", if you prefer - they've probably realised that when the stockmarket was doing well and they relied on its growth rather than feeding money in themselves they weren't really doing a very good job, and now they might have to pump in oodles of cash (though really they ought to just ride it - long term it won't cost as much as any current trend might indicate cos, y'know, it's cyclical) to compensate for the fund's investments doing badly. Really, though, it's generally just a lazy-arse firm using a downturn as an excuse to cut a very good but hugely underappreciated perk off, and also preventing becoming Ford or BA, which are really pension funds that happen to make a few cars or fly a few planes, because the value of the former is so large.

Personally, I'd be using the word "cunts", followed by "resignation" (and then perhaps "regret", but never mind).

So, what happened? You've left us hanging on a cliff hanger like at the end of Crossroads where your director has said "there are some business things we need to talk about" and then you hear the final theme tune sting followed by the ATV/Central logo.

I'm now imagining your boss to be David Hunter, the West Midlands most charismatic motel owner.

But anyway, what happened?

Come on The Egg, don't leave us hanging!

Like all good heroes, I went to the pub and I got mortally drunk and couldn't see to type when I got home. So apologies for leaving you hanging.

Well, it was exactly as I imagined I'm afraid; Our 12 month fee forecast was presented and discussed and we basically drew a line across December. If we don't get any more commissions before the end of November there will be redundancies.

I am of of the two members of staff and I am the most expensive!

If one or two of the projects that we have in the pipeline that are tagged as 'highly probable' (to turn into fee earning work) come in then the business can delay the redundancy decision until March. If more of them (or all of them) come in then we will be able to ride out the next 12 months.

Most of this is reliant upon the bank providing the business with a borrowing facility, the decision is due next week. If they decline the application then it's pretty much game over for both members of staff and the directors will probably go back to working out of their dining rooms. As a relatively new business our access to borrowing is somewhat limited so it's not a sustainable plan.

In the short term to there will be cost cutting - we're serving notice on the first floor of our office so we'll all be in one smaller office downstairs; the directors are foregoing their dividend for the next 2 years and other smaller stuff to reduce costs.

I'm not sure how I feel. I am bitterly disappointed that this has happened as I was previously with a large company who offered slightly more security; but my old office have just laid off three people (admittedly they were the poorest performing members of staff that I had already ear marked for binning off before the Troubles (tm)). However, I always suspected that this might happen and it was a likely outcome. When I made my mind up to move (6 months ago) who really would have thought that the Government would be bailing out Lloyds or HBoS? Besides on a different day the opportunities here far outweighed the risks. And it's quite fun.

So, my options are;
1. Sit tight and ride it out hope for the best and give the guys my support
2. Start my calls now and see if some of the last remaining QS/PM jobs in Wales/South West are still available
3. As per 2 but dust off my Pith helmet and head to the Far East - Where all of the MONIES! are.

I need to make sure that I can maintain a similar income - I'm getting married next December and The Current Future Mrs The Egg has very expensive tastes.

Fixed That For Me! (although I think this counts as frivolity in an otherwise serious thread so Mod set you phasers to kill)

Our phazers only have 'fix fucked up formatting' and 'lock thread in a manly fashion then unlock it again'.

You called? PEW PEW!

Really sorry to hear that EW. Got my fingers crossed for you.

That really sucks Mr The Egg. I would hate to be in your situation. Hope everything works out.

That's a bugger. Might be best to sit it out as long as possible while looking for other work I guess.

Well there's plenty of work about for a chap like me . . . . . it's just unfortunate that it's all on the other side of the world

I will start looking today though, I need to be employed and as much as I want to stay and give these guys everything to make it a success there is a massive chance that we just wont make it.

I've just seen a job advertised for Abu Dhabi that pays 25% more than I am currently earning ; I think that it might be a given that I am out of the UK before Christmas.

Just don't go doing any shagging on the beach. Also, bear in mind there may be some tax advantages to that as well - I don't know for certain what the tax issues with the gulf is, you may well not get taxed at source on that salary and if that is the case, I'd look into only bringing into the country what you need to live on.

What's your field, Eggy?

From page 1 of this very thread:

Page 1 can fuck off.

Yeah, fuck them Page 1 bastards!

Client side construction Project Manager and Chartered Quantity Surveyor and I dabble part time as a Sex God but that doesn't pay as well as it used to.

I imagine there are all kinds of quantities to be surveyed in the Gulf at the moment - they seem to be going building stuff mental for the last few years. What about China and India? Aren't they knocking up factories and power stations all over?

I think the quantities over there are so vast they don't even bother surveying them, they just do it!

They sure are but for some reason they haven't ever appealed to me.

I am lucky in that I did a 2 month secondment in Dubai the Christmas before last so that should bolster my CV.

Also, all of their lager is export strength.

I'm not sure I'd want to live there, my brother spent 6 months in Bahrain and that was enough for him.

My cousin is a QS and recently moved to Dubai (a year or so ago) and loves it there.

Oh shit.

I do feel some guilt having said approximately "Ahhh, what could honestly go wrong?" when we spoke about this move when the opportunity came up.

Also, I, working for a firm selling almost exclusively into the NHS am insulated to a fair degree (although no-one is safe and we do have sizeable gearing as I understand things). Smear tests will still have to take place and people with stomas will still need pouches.

I really hope you don't have to go and work abroad Egg. However consider this: My grandfather (the legend who is Grandbill for those on here who know him) had to work all over the world in the 80s when he was at Cable & Wireless. Macau, Bahrain, Hong Kong and loads of places you wouldn't want to have gone in the 80s. He did alright from it and looks back on it as a part of his life that was worthwhile and enriching and in the grand scheme of things only a few years out of his many being away for weeks and home for a few days.

And of course his family felt the benefit of all that offshore pay. Which Mrs Alexandra Egg will appreciate I'm sure, even if she has to suffer peaceful nights of deep undisturbed sleep and a tidy house with no-one changing her Sky channel to get it. Hang on, I mean she'll have to put up with... er... stuff not getting fixed? Heavy things having to be moved by teams of queers and stuff on high shelves being abandoned (that's better).

Anyway. What was my point....? Oh yes. From my position of not having to face this. Working abroad ain't so bad. It's temporary and usually worth 1.5 years pay for each year you do (approximately). As long as you can both see it as that and get through it you will both be better of for it in my second hand experience.

I hope you survive this period of fallout following the worldwide, governmental financial services mismanagement and get out the other side largely unscathed.

Quick update for you (in self obsessed, centre of everything stylee)

Despite a team effort to turn things around and create opportunities, yesterday I got a letter from the directors advising me that they were commencing the consultation period of redundancies.

On Friday at 3pm the PA is meeting with the directors to discuss redundancy and I have the same meeting at 4pm. Because of the size of the company, retraining or redeployment isn't an option.

I am expecting the following to happen;

1. PA made redundant there and then and therefore commence her 30 days notice
2. The Egg to be told that unless more work comes in within a fortnight, I will be having the same discussion. And have my 30 days notice over Christmas.*
3. There is a slim chance that I will be retained until early next year given the high probability of some of the jobs coming into the fee forecast

Whilst every bit of me wants to stay and ride it out and hope for the best, the reality is that I have a mortgage and bills to pay so the security of a job is becoming a high priority. Whilst it's all very commendable to stick by the guys I think it's about time I started to look out for me.

So plan of attack; wait to hear what's said on Friday.

Spend the weekend writing CV and spend next week tapping up contacts - I think it's pretty safe to say there's bugger all chance of a job in South Wales.

Concentrate on getting to Dubai/Abu Dhabi before they go into melt down too.

Arse.

So if anybody wants a fantastically good looking, experienced QS/PM/Part time sex god please do let me know!

* If they were to make me redundant on Friday and as my probation period doesn't end until December I could only get two weeks notice. That would suck donkey sack.

Sorry to hear that EW

Sorry to hear about your troubles Egg. I was staring down the barrel about 6 months ago, so I jumped before the push. Worked out well for me.

Can you pole dance?

A sensible plan.

Thanks chaps,

It's a good job I have a stash of these 'ere Monster Munch to keep my morale up.

I wonder which vocations/professions aren't being hit by all of this financial strife? Is there a career that is recession proof?

I just found big monster munch for the first time today in Boots.

Flaming hot rather than Pickled Onion but still excellent.

I dunno about proof. Certainly the public sector is more resistent, as Mrs The Egg can attest.

Bailiff.

Aye. The bubble may have burst for estate agents, but it's a golden era for repo men. A time that will never end.

Simpsons quote! "We can't pay you, but please, take more stock!"

Toilet paper manufacturers.

I'm half and half about how good my job chances are due to being told that the country my channel broadcasts to (not the UK) wants only half the amount of time booked for commercials than what is usually put in a day by the very strict Ofcom rules... Ad spending has just vanished. Luckily though this company is tighter than tight at the best of times so the worst times are offset by the rocking 9 months we had until now. For a bit.

Insolvency practitioner. Of course when it's boom then you're fucked.

How about Joke Repeater?

Myp would be the richest man alive.

Oi! Serious thread, get out!

Indeed. People should be warned that I might be forced to invoke Norman.



There is serious shit going down. Orders are down for me but I've got a decent level of enquires and I do have shit months from time to time. But although enquiry levels are fine, it's questionable if conversion rates are dropping. I'll need another month to work that one out due to long lead times.

What are the hours?

I'm guessing my job's pretty safe.

I ('m in training to) process Job Seeker's Allowance claims.

As you can imagine, its a little crazy at the moment.

Well, another quick update after this afternoon's meeting;

As expected the PA was unfortunately let go today, not sure how she took it as I haven't spoken to her yet.

The situation with my role is that unless anything changes (fee income wise) then I will be having the same conversation at the end of January.

Ah well, chin up, it really isn't the end of the world.