Be Excellent To Each Other

1. Uncharted (Remastered)(PS4)

Working though my back log.
Quite a fun game but the camera is terrible, keeps moving as I jump and plummet to my doom.

Let's goooooo!

1. Resident Evil: VIIIage (PS5)
I preferred 7, but after a shaky start 8 quickly got its claws in (literally ho ho ho) and turned into the resi that you know and love. The giant lady and her daughters are too campy to be scary (and God knows why her voice actor was winning awards for the voice acting - it's fine and all but compared to the glory of writing and acting that was DeathLoop she shouldn't have got a sniff at it), but the dollhouse level is legit scary, and one of the scariest bits in a RE game since the part in the first one where you're running through the right-angle corridor that's been empty for most of the game but suddenly there are spiders there. Anyway, it's good, and it got stupid toward the end, like every single RE game ever. I'd have liked to have seen more "puzzle" stuff, like RE7 did with the video tapes. But never mind.

2. The Outer Wilds (XSX)
This has been re-added to GamePass, and oh my God it's superb. I love a time loop anyway, but this combines space exploration with physics with quantum physics with time travel and, look, I can't say much about it because it'll ruin it, but it's fantastic. The first 20 minutes or so feels like a bit of a slog and had me thinking it was a game for children, but I was very, very wrong. Play it, hurry up.

Food the outer wilds there also contain the dlc?
Mechanically a bit different, and smaller in scope, but still very outer wildsy. (Which to my mind is a good thing, as I can't think of a better game)

I don't believe so, but I suspect I'll buy it anyway.

3. Zombie Army Trilogy DLCs

The two youngest members of the Yes, Chef!s have kicked so much more zombie arse since completing the game originally that I feel it needs to revisited on this list.
The DLC is of varying quality, and they continue to have a plot that neither I or @cras pay any real attention to. If I had to be critical they could give you more opportunity for some real long-range sniping - often the action is up close or the sightlines are blocked (mostly by Craster walking his stupid ass in front of me). Obviously there's no real danger if the enemy is 500 meters away, but it would make a change, and give us a reason to have upgraded our guns to 8x zoom.
Also, some of the DLC levels are just one big level, rather than one level split into four bits like they normally are. This has the unfortunate side-effect of forcing you to complete it in one sitting, which kept us online until 1am last night.

But you still get to shoot nazi zombies in the balls, and it's still great.

A well written summary touching on so many of the salient points that make this such a fine game. I feel it's important to highlight possibly the most important point, just to reiterate it for heightened impact.

You still get to shoot nazi zombies in the balls

Isn't that all we really want?

(1) Xenoblade Chronicles: Remastered Edition (Switch)

Not only is this my first ever JRPG I ever played (back on the poor old Wii) but it’s my all time favourite. Not only is it easy to learn; accessible and just loads of fun but it has a great story (albeit told in your typical anime stylings).

Now I’m older and wiser I spent lots of time doing side missions and dicking about exploring for the level ups so I was never under levelled but also cause the world is so fucking nice to explore. I spent a reasonable amount of time just wandering the nooks and crannies and filling in the map looking for bits or quest givers, all set against some of the best music committed to a game.

I levelled up to level 96 (of 99) and literally the only missions I haven’t done were the super bosses. The first of which turned me right off doing any of them just because on this big spider boss a single hit dazes a party member until you monado their special shield off. Which lasts oooh 2 maybe 3 seconds? It can fuck right off.

10/10 literally my fave JRPG

Oh and there’s some DLC thing that I have tried yet! So that’ll be next.

1) Hitman 3 (PC)

Like Hitman 2, but threeier

Good game. Make careful plans to kill someone. Then find some goon you hadn't noticed appears and finds you stripping a dude.

4. Doom Eternal

I played this on the PC when it came out, got to the penultimate level, and stopped. Then I got it on the Xbox and spanked it on the Demon bum. I'm fairly sure I prefer Doom 2016 to this, as it became a bit to much of "I require (a) so I'll do (b)", but it's still great. I ripped, I tore, I was entertained.

And the music is still exceptional.

Fuck me, I'm on track for 52

2) Xenoblade Chronicles: Future Connected DLC (Switch)

It’s only the fucking left shoulder of the bionis! It’s also only (only!?) a 10 hour campaign about what happened (sort of) after the end of the game! Yay!

Frankly, while a JRPG is hard to knock your socks off thanks to the nature of grinding and combat, it’s still utterly stunning that there’s DLC to absolutely everyone’s favourite 10 year old Wii game ever.

The good: the left shoulder is a joy to traverse that looks amazing with lots of secrets and big old cunts to fight. The story is alright, but mainly I just wanted to know everyone was good (except Riki) … and they were.

The bad: it’s Nopon heavy. Sharla & Reyn are replaced by two identical nopon kids because no one thought they were tedious cunts, right? The story is just there and involves a rift that’s never explained and a footing shoulder that’s never explained either. Or I skipped the text. Maybe that actually. And some enemies are recycled from the main game.

10/10 an amazing DLC that I doubt anyone was ever expecting, let alone expecting it to be this good and fleshed out.

2) Xenoblade Chronicles: Future Connected DLC (Switch)

It’s only the fucking left shoulder of the bionis! It’s also only (only!?) a 10 hour campaign about what happened (sort of) after the end of the game! Yay!

Frankly, while a JRPG is hard to knock your socks off thanks to the nature of grinding and combat, it’s still utterly stunning that there’s DLC to absolutely everyone’s favourite 10 year old Wii game ever.

The good: the left shoulder is a joy to traverse that looks amazing with lots of secrets and big old cunts to fight. The story is alright, but mainly I just wanted to know everyone was good (except Riki) … and they were.

The bad: it’s Nopon heavy. Sharla & Reyn are replaced by two identical nopon kids because no one thought they were tedious cunts, right? The story is just there and involves a rift that’s never explained and a footing shoulder that’s never explained either. Or I skipped the text. Maybe that actually. And some enemies are recycled from the main game.

10/10 an amazing DLC that I doubt anyone was ever expecting, let alone expecting it to be this good and fleshed out.

1) Hitman 3 (PC)
2) Borderlands 3 (PC)

I don't think i was particularly in the mood for this.

3) Evil Genius 2 (PC)

Outstays its welcome _loooong_ before the end. Took around 40 hours, but just boring for about half of that.

2: Uncharted 2 (Remastered)(PS4)

I enjoyed this. I am loving the Indian Jones meets Assassins Creed vibe.

Very much like the first. I still dislike the camera angles, that keep making you fling yourself to your doom.

5. Mirror's Edge Catalyst

Like a lot of other people (I suspect) I really liked the first Mirror's Edge. And like a lot of other people (I suspect) I tried the demo of Mirror's Edge 2 and was strongly disappointed, and ignored the game when it came out six years ago to fairly mediocre reviews. Then a year and a bit ago Dimrill told me that it was really good, and that stuck with me. Then I saw it on Gamepass and played the shit out of it. It's great! Yes, the combat is shit and I personally didn't realise it was a prequel so I didn't understand why Faith was younger than I thought and why she couldn't initially do stuff that she could in the original. But the running about remains joyous, and considering it's a racing game at heart that's what really matters. Even though it's six years old there are still moments of utter beauty, and the final level in particular has moments that blew me away

So yeah, I really enjoyed this. It's ME1, but more.

I do wish they'd have played the song from the original at the end, though.

Once again I would strongly doubt I will complete 5.2, let alone 52. I can never sit still for long enough.

However, I did complete a game yesterday, and it's easily hands down the fucking worst game I have ever played. In all of my 48 years on this earth. So what was it? The Last Of Us 2. Now I had heard it wasn't a very happy game back at launch. I did not get myself caught in the shenanigans because I knew that would likely spoil the game. However, I didn't feel £50-£60 to be miserable was worth it so I waited for it to be cheaper. I did, however, want to know the story having loved the first one so much.

What can I say? it's a shitty, miserable, nihilistic waltz through the shittiest story I have ever seen. There will be spoilers. I would hope that this long after launch any one would have played it already, but if you haven't and fancy a 25 hour torture session then stop reading now.

This game is the miserable kid who doesn't respond to humour, or happiness, or anything else other than sitting in the corner in a pile of its own fucking shit. Every single chance it had (and there were fucking LOADS) to grant some long overdue happiness it tears up, throws on the floor and pisses on. Why? shock value? I wasn't shocked at all. I had seen 8 seasons of The Walking Dead before it got a bit too nasty for me and so I stopped watching it. IE, the flips of happiness and misery were all misery so I decided I had seen enough. And that is exactly what this game does for 99% of the time. Makes you fucking miserable. Forces you to do things you don't want to do (and make you put down the controller and walk away) yet for some reason as a human you still have that hope in the back of your mind that makes you want to do it, even though it forces you against what you feel. It does this so many times. Like making you play as a character you are supposed to hate for over 12 hours. By the time it was done? I liked her more than Ellie. By the time it was done I fucking hated every one in the game.

This includes ole "Bipolar Tommy". You see when Joel dies Tommy doesn't want any of it. The man clearly had a modicum of sense. Yet Ellie talks him into dragging himself, alone (not sure why) half way across the USA to kill these people. And then when they get down to all but one? Bipolar Tommy decides he has had enough and yup, walks away. So you end up in a lovely farm house with Ellie's female partner and her baby. You think that maybe, just maybe, the game will end peacefully and happily. But nope ! ole Bipolar Tommy rocks up, has just split up with his wife and now wants to convince Ellie to ditch her life and go off on another revenge mission. Which, will come as no surprise to you at all, she does. Off she goes again. Only when you finally get to this girl who they left alive she doesn't kill her. Instead she gets her fingers bitten off, stopping her from playing the guitar, and going back to a deserted farm house TO BE MISERABLE. Which is how the game ends.

As for sickening nasty shit? oh, it has it all. You kill someone's pet dog and then a couple of hours later you play a flashback where you are forced, as the owner, to play with the dog. Pet it and throw a toy for it to retrieve. HAVE SOME GUILT YOU MOTHER FUCKERS !!!! You even kill a pregnant woman. Which for some fucking reason Ellie doesn't see until she's stabbed her in the throat.

The last 5 hours of the game were a real slog. But it's that human hope that keeps you in the game. "Maybe Abby will find the Fireflies and Ellie will meet Abby and they will go off for Ellie to provide the cure?" NOPE ! even Ellie dying would be far to happy for you cunts SO HERE HAVE ANOTHER HEAP OF MISERY.

By the time it is over? you are actually fucking relieved. Which left me feeling one way. I really hope this is the last of them. IE, they tore down the first game, burnt it into ash, pissed on it to make concrete and then chucked it into the sea. A self destruct mission from the very start. By the time it's over? you just hate every one. Maybe, in fact, I felt more empathy for Abby. But basically you are just left feeling that you wish they would all just fuck off and never come back. Ever.

Two stupid love triangles simultaneously, both of which are just fucking dumb. I liked the fact that Ellie was into girls, and I liked how Abby was buff and had no tits. Those parts of it I did like. That was about it for me. Every other moment of the game was pure misery, apart from about two times it flashes back to the first game and gives you some of the old magic. Then it's back to shitting on you from a great height, forcing you to watch a bunch of vacuous cunts and even play as them.

Ugh.

6. Dreamscaper (XSX)

It's like Hades, but different enough to make it worth a go. Being a fucking Hades expert I kicked the shit out of it, obviously. Free on GamePass at the moment, and well worth a try.

3) Returnal (PS)

Rogue-like bullet hell third person shooter with some psychological horror thrown in? Yes fucking please.

Cracked the main story in 13 hours, which I think was pretty swift given all the reviews about how hard it is, and just the secret ending to do. Well, if and when I can be bothered. I’ve looked it up cause the actual end was very “WTF” and I thought I’d missed something and it turns out I had. I’ve got to find another thingy in each of the 6 worlds and I’m not entirely convinced I can be bothered, but I was having such a good time that I reckon I won’t spoil anything and just go looking for these thingys.

Gotta say, I really enjoyed blasting away in this alien world and it was absolutely ace. But some of the regular enemies can just go fuck off in the later worlds. Man alive, If you haven’t got the best weapons or have purchased all the healing items you can muster then you’re pretty fucked. Thankfully I’m a hoarder but a couple of times I got spanked just walking into a room and having a shit ton of lasers and red circles homing in on my position before I had chance to get my bearings.

3: Uncharted 3 (Remastered)(PS4)

More of the same. Might try something different before I buy 4.

Tomorrow might bring joy.

. Yippee

Although I found I have uncharted 4 anyway

1) Hitman 3 (PC)
2) Borderlands 3 (PC)
3) Evil Genius 2 (PC)
4) Divinity Original Sin 2 (PC)
Like Divinity original sin. But twoier.

4) Metroid Dredd (Switch)

Did you know I’ve never played a 2D Metroid game? This was my first and I must say, it was pretty darn enjoyable. You get ferried around the map pretty swiftly as your movement systems increase with one of the, I don’t know, like, 20 sodding pickups? You don’t really need all the different bits and bobs you collect unless you go item hunting but as so many are hidden in hidden bits of random walls and shit it’s not really a lot of fun to go seek out 100% of the items so I didn’t bother and got by with what I’d come across on my travels. The best bit of the game by far were the boss fights of which there are 30 and they can be extremely challenging (especially the back end dudes). The final boss was such a dick but ultimately a lot of fun to beat once I had all his patterns down so much so that I was untouchable for his first two phases are multiple deaths. Less fun was this game’s “gimmick” which are robots that chase you about. They’re unkillable and lead to very few moments where the chase is fun. But the chases broke up the rest of the game intermittently so it’s hard to moan much about them as it probably needed a bit of variety.

So my first Metroid experience was … yeah, it’s pretty good. I could play another of these.

4. Uncharted 4 The Thieves' End

The last but one, of the Uncharted Series, just the lost legacy to go (need to buy it).

Now to start Far Cry 4

7. Infernax (XSX)

I thought this was going to be like Salt and Sanctuary, which I loved. But it wasn't. It's not very good. It is pretty short, though.

8. Gran Turismo 7 (PS5)

A superb racing game wrapped in a shitstorm of bad decisions. Once you're racing, everything is fine. Before you're racing (even right before, with the bullshit rolling starts that you're always at the back of) it's terrible - crappy UI, people you don't care about talking to you ALL THE FUCKING TIME, too many of the same kind of car (honestly, how many BMW M3s does one person need), bullshit microtransactions making earning money an irritating grind, utterly crap multiplayer lobby. Off the track it's more like an RPG than a racing game (hence I've completed it, because there's a "menu book" and if you fill it in you get the end credits).

Like I said, it's a great racing game, but it's no better than Forza Motorsport 7 (slightly prettier, I guess), and the latter does literally everything else better.

I've completed a game! Super Star Wars on the SNES... It was alright I guess?

1) Hitman 3 (PC)
2) Borderlands 3 (PC)
3) Evil Genius 2 (PC)
4) Divinity Original Sin 2 (PC)

I forgot to add

5) First Class Escape 2 (PC)

An escape room game.

1) Secret of Monkey Island (ScummVM/Switch - I think it was the PC version)
Still lovely, and I still remember how to complete it. The music didn't sound as good as I remember (this might be a PC/Amiga thing, or maybe it just wasn't setup right, but the Switch kept crashing when I went into the settings).
Already started Monkey Island 2 and I don't have a clue what I'm doing, but I'm blundering through ok at the moment.

Ooh, I guess I can post in this thread too, lol.

1) Secret of Monkey Island (Special Edition, PS Now)

Largely the same as Joans, still as fantastic as it ever was, although I definitely prefer the "classic" look to the Special Edition look, and the user interface and controls on the SE is shit by comparison - which makes some of the puzzles a little more challenging.

Also, the same as Joans, I'm now blundering my way through MI2 Special Edition on PS Now. It never did hold my attention as well as the first game.

1) Secret of Monkey Island (Special Edition, PS Now)
2) Monkey Island 2: LeChuck’s Revenge (Special Edition, PS Now)

Got there in the end. So much backtracking and going to and from the various islands, which I think is why I didn’t like it compared to the original.

Still very entertaining though.

9. Limbo (XSX)

Yeah, I'm down with the kids, so I completed Limbo. It's good, innit? You don't need me to tell you, you all played it eleven years ago when it came out.

I haven’t played the it…

5. Far Cry 4 - PS4 Thanks @maliA for lending me your copy.

This games has everything, from drug induced wanderings, killing elephants with flame throwers, and fighting demons. I really enjoyed the campaign, I went with Aninta for the choices.

Sky Force Reloaded on the Switch. A proper grindy shoot em up where you have to do each level multiple times to slowly build up your ship.
Despite all the grinding, I really like it.

Oh yeah, three games completed last week!

10. State of Decay II (XSX)
I loved the original State of Decay so was asaddened when I read a review saying the sequel was full of bugs. I decided to leave it for a while to let them patch them out. Nine years turned out to be enough, as I didn't encounter any bugs at all. What I did encounter was State of Decay, but more. Which was very pleasing.

11. Resident Evil 3 Remake (PS5)
Currently on sale for only £20, this is a short game (6 hours or so) starring (of course) your boy Nemesis. It's very different from the original RE3, but they've done a great job updating the story and the cinematic scenes are largely excellent. Jill is perhaps a bit too sexy (and there's an eyebrow-raising moment where a tentacle forces its way into her mouth and pumps a load of goo into her), and they've removed a lot of the puzzle bits so this one is far more shooty-shooty. It's not as good as the RE2 remake but then RE3 wasn't as good as RE2 so I guess they're just staying true to the source material.

12. Bayonetta 2 (Switch)
Bayonetta continues to be absolutely absurd and wonderful. They got rid of the quick time events in the sequel, which is A Good Thing. It looks great on the Switch too.

5) Elden Ring (PS5)

MASTERPIECE!

I’ve been everywhere, killed everything at least once and, as far as I’m aware, I’ve missed very little. Well, I fucked up a few quests and only saw one ending but I had all the bits to choose, like, all the endings. Yes, I used the wiki to clean up areas, dungeons and gaols I’d missed (and I’d missed plenty on a first run through of each area) but I’m satisfied that the 130-odd hours it took to complete the game was comprehensive.

Whether it’s the best Dark Souls game ever made, I don’t know, but it’s an astonishing game. Just an absolute joy to play from start to finish.

Crucible Knights can fuck off though.

11/10 - game of the year

2) Monkey Island 2
Got there in the end. The first version I played kept crashing on Phatt Island, so I had to start again. It didn't seem as difficult as I remember it, but I guess that just meant most of the solutions were still in my head somewhere. The few times I did get stuck, I knew what I was meant to do, just couldn't remember how to do it.
All ready for the proper sequel now...

6. Horizon - Zero Dawn (PS5)

I absolutely loved this game, the landscape, the quests the killing machines. I liked the story as it is a little different form other games I have played.

1) Hitman 3 (PC)
2) Borderlands 3 (PC)
3) Evil Genius 2 (PC)
4) Divinity Original Sin 2 (PC)
5) First Class Escape 2 (PC)
6) Zelda: Link to the past (SNES)

Never completed it before. I got very close on the gba version, but the worm near the end kept knocking me off. This time, not so much. (I think I found a better sword this time, which meant I only had to hit wormy bastard twice)

7. Horizon - Zero Dawn - Frozen Wilds (DLC) (PS5)

Horizon Zero Dawn in the snow. New Machines to fight, adn a lot tougher. Fecking bears!!

13. Nobody Saves the World (XSX)

An action RPG from the same folks that made Guacamelee!, NStW is funny and cute but deceptively clever. You can transform into different forms (mermaid, robot, horse, slug, etc) and each form you unlock comes with a special power, which you can then apply to the other forms. You need to mix and match these things because baddies sometimes have shields that only a certain type of attack (sharp, dark, holy and blunt) can break. It's about 20 hours long, it's grindy but the grind is the fun bit. Even the sidequests are fun. Well worth your time for sure.

3) Yakuza Kiwami PS4/5
After many aborted attempts to get through this since it first came out on the PS2, I finally made it all the way through. Unfortunately, I was playing it over such a long period of time, I usually had absolutely no idea who anybody was or what was going on. Fortunately, Yakuza 2 features a nice recap at the start of the game, which I probably would have rewatched before finishing this one if I'd known about it (although I guess it would have spoiled the ending, so maybe not). Anyway, it's still the spiritual successor to Shenmue, and I felt compelled to do far too many side stories for very little gain, but I'll try to finish the second (and subsequent) ones in a bit of a shorter time frame

Let's do this properly and see if I can remember....

1. Super Star Wars - SNES
2. Sky Force Reloaded - Switch

I've also completed Shinobi - Arcade. I couldn't have done this without the rewind feature on the Switch but I'm surprised I hadn't completed it sooner? It's one of my favourite arcade games.

Also, Moonstone - Amiga. Again, I couldn't have done this without save states as some of those monsters were proper hard to kill! I also managed to do it without figuring out that you could spend XP points to raise your health, strength and things like that. If I'd have figured that out sooner, it may have been easier. I enjoyed this one and I'm glad I've clocked it. It's only been about 30 years in the making.

5. Nessy the Robot - Evercade. The Evercade Vs offers a downloadable game of the month. It's an indie title and this month we have Nessy the Robot. It's a very basic, and very short platformer. Not exactly brilliant by any stretch of the imagination but very easy to complete. Pointless out of ten.

8 . Horizon - the forbidden west. (Ps5). More of Aloy trying to save the world and making friends along the way.

The game is visually stunning, I really enjoyed the main quest and did not want it to end. I hope the make a 3rd one soon.

6) Generation Zero (Xbox)

Day Z-ish survival/FPS against robots set in Sweden.

It’s janky, enemy AI is dreadful, the map is too big, the world is too quiet and empty and the environments are copy paste but damn is it pretty, the shooting is solid, sound design is fabulous and has a really nice atmosphere.

It also has 4-player coop which can be fun taking down giant spider robots. Obviously its got something about it otherwise I wouldn’t have stuck it out but it’s hard to recommend without friends. Mind you, it’s on Game Pass so it shouldn’t be too hard at the minute to get your friends to come and try it out for an evening.

9. Guardians of the Galaxy (PS5) - A bit of fun. Not based on the MCU version which was great. A good story, very linear, going form A to B to C. It is quite funny and held my interest, but The fights are a little annoying, and repetitive.

Over all a solid middle of the road game.

14. Unpacking (XSX)

It's a pixel art game where you take stuff from boxes and find places around the house to store it. It tells the story of a woman's life from getting her own bedroom to around early middle age.

It's very non-taxing, simple to play and tells a fairly nice story - all with barely any text at all, just by the way her possessions grow (and which ones stay the same).

It's free on Gamepass and only takes a couple of hours to play through, so it's worth a shot to see if it's your kind of thing. It's also an easy 1,000 gamerpoints, if anyone is still interested in such a thing. Protip - flush the toilets!

15. Unravelled 2 (XSX)

I forgot I'd finished this. The Grimlet and I played it and it's lots of fun. Basically it's a co-op platform puzzler. Some story shit is going on in the background but we didn't really follow that, we just raced to be the first one to get to checkpoints and let go of the rope holding the other up at opportune lul moments.

The turkey boss is fucking hilarious.