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 Post subject: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 16:16 
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Hello Hello Hello

Joined: 11th May, 2008
Posts: 13386
Hello everyone,

It's a great honour (it says here) to present BEEXWEEX, a venture that is largely rendered pointless from now until the end of time by TheVision's fantastic cinematic presentation of said weekly semi-erotic amuse-fest earlier in the year.

Either get* him to do it all the time or chuck the entire sorry venture into the great online dustbin of sadness and despair, where it can fester in eternity as a devastating monument to human failure and the inevitability of decline and death.

(*Payment, coercion, torture, etc.)

Anyhoo, listed below are the various nominations for POTW that I have received during the last seven days. I have helpfully listed them as A through O, please note that this is in no way intended to imply a grading or other 'categorisation of worthiness', but merely reflects the chronological order in which they were belched towards my inbox.

For the first day of the BLIZZARD OF PMs I dared to dream that someone at BEEX liked me and wanted to engage in a sexy personal conversation about PC upgrades, but that soon wore off and I realised instead it just meant that I had to tediously arrange a bunch of URLs into a meaningless list.

I have bookended this stellar presentation with pictures of me chugging a dildo and poorly faking a suicide attempt by means of slitting my wrists. It's a sort of 'telling stories with pictures' deal.

Please enjoy BEEXWEEX. Where YOUR happiness is OUR mission.

Attachment:
dildoavatar.jpg


A

B

C

D

E

F

G

H

I

J

K

L

M

N

O

Attachment:
slitwrist.JPG


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 16:19 
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Meh

Joined: 13th Apr, 2008
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I find the first picture disturbing on many levels. Also I think you are missing out on some witty comments beside each link to a recommended post.

Otherwise fantastic stuff.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 16:22 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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I'll never be able to not see you with a dildo in your mouth.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 16:23 
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Nemmie wrote:
Also I think you are missing out on some witty comments beside each link to a recommended post.

True, but I meant I had to read them all rather than just my own, which was a nice change.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 16:37 
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"Praisebot"

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It’s quite exciting! I haven’t clicked on any of the links yet so I don’t know if I’ve been nominated.

I can’t wait....


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 16:49 
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ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!
Yours are the last three.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 17:07 
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ugvm'er at heart...

Joined: 4th Mar, 2010
Posts: 22391
I clicked every link and not a single nomination? Fuck you Beex.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 17:16 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Try this one:

ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!
You suck.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2012 19:22 
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Bad Girl

Joined: 20th Apr, 2008
Posts: 14416
Three noms in three weeks. Yahtzee!

Edit: ...and well done AE!


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Sat Apr 14, 2012 12:13 
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Est. 1978

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Some of them were mine. I like the suspense of this one.

And I'm curiously aroused :)

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Sat Apr 14, 2012 19:50 
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Hibernating Druid

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Well, you've always said you like a cock in your porn.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Sun Apr 15, 2012 18:19 
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Worst

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 6197
I was away, so it was more of a Beex Weax. I'm sure there were some nice posts though...

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Mon Apr 16, 2012 18:13 
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Why the motherfucking hell am I BEEX Weeker again? Third time in less than 6 bastard months. Do you think I have unlimited time? I'm busy all day on Friday, so in advance, it's gonna be late.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Mon Apr 16, 2012 18:15 
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UltraMod

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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lolololol

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Mon Apr 16, 2012 18:21 
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Hello Hello Hello

Joined: 11th May, 2008
Posts: 13386
WTB wrote:
Why the motherfucking hell am I BEEX Weeker again? Third time in less than 6 bastard months. Do you think I have unlimited time? I'm busy all day on Friday, so in advance, it's gonna be late.


Sorry WTB, when I nominated you I did do so with the proviso 'Give it to WTB if he's never done it before or hasn't done it for ages'.

The honest truth is that like an awful of threads/posts at BEEX, I simply don't read the Beex Weex threads normally*, so off the top of my head I had no idea if you'd never done it before or indeed had done it fifty times in the last year.



* Not because I don't want to, but simply because I don't do internet forums at work and it's too much hassle to try and catch up at the end of every day, especially since everything is still lumped together in a single 'one size fits all' forum. You can tell when I'm on annual leave because I post all kinds of shit during the day :D


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Mon Apr 16, 2012 18:31 
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Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 14497
You BASTARD!


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Mon Apr 16, 2012 18:31 
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Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 14497
(Always nominate Zardoz.)


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 Post subject: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Mon Apr 16, 2012 18:32 
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baron of techno

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 24136
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Classic 'stinger' AE :)


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 9:57 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Location: Standing on your mother's Porsche
I've already done it twice now. There's loads of posters who have never done it yet.

If I do it again it'll be a Zardoz special.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:26 
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Sleepyhead

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
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When at home I shall make a list and ensure that the joy is shared round a bit more.

WTB still has to do it this week, though.

:D

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:34 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

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Curiosity wrote:
When at home I shall make a list and ensure that the joy is shared round a bit more.

WTB still has to do it this week, though.

:D

"HERE ARE THE RULES FOR 'HAVING FUN'. PAY ATTENTION."

Let people go onto a 'do not nom me' list if they want to, but otherwise people should be able to nom who they like.

Unless it's for guidance purposes only, of course.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:39 
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ugvm'er at heart...

Joined: 4th Mar, 2010
Posts: 22391
When I did it, I got a list of people who had already done it, which was nice info to have if I wanted to be nice, and guidance that I could choose any fucker I liked regardless.
Seems the best solution to me, why fix something that isn't broken?


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:45 
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Unpossible!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 38654
I dun a list but dunt keep it up. Too much like work.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:46 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

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Trooper wrote:
Seems the best solution to me, why fix something that isn't broken?

WTB is suggesting that it is.

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I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:48 
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Sleepyhead

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 27354
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Aye, there's no plan to mandate anyone doing it at any time, but people tend to ask, 'Who hasn't done it in a while', so a list would be useful. There was one, but it fell into disrepair.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:49 
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Unpossible!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 38654
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheet/lv? ... jd0eFBkbmc

As it was when once I tried


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:50 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

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search.php?keywords=weex&author=&sf=titleonly&sc=1&sd=d&sr=posts&st=0&ch=300&t=0&submit=Search

Here's one, in reverse date order. Anyone with silly spelling bought it on themselves.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:54 
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Paws for thought

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Grim... wrote:
Curiosity wrote:
When at home I shall make a list and ensure that the joy is shared round a bit more.

WTB still has to do it this week, though.

:D

"HERE ARE THE RULES FOR 'HAVING FUN'. PAY ATTENTION."

Let people go onto a 'do not nom me' list if they want to, but otherwise people should be able to nom who they like.

Unless it's for guidance purposes only, of course.

indeed. i cant do it generally as tryung to do it on a phone would be nigh impossible. youd end up with a load of linkless spludge.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:54 
SupaMod
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Mr Dave wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Curiosity wrote:
When at home I shall make a list and ensure that the joy is shared round a bit more.

WTB still has to do it this week, though.

:D

"HERE ARE THE RULES FOR 'HAVING FUN'. PAY ATTENTION."

Let people go onto a 'do not nom me' list if they want to, but otherwise people should be able to nom who they like.

Unless it's for guidance purposes only, of course.

indeed. i cant do it generally as tryung to do it on a phone would be nigh impossible. youd end up with a load of linkless spludge.

I am so nomming you next chance I get.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 10:56 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Location: Standing on your mother's Porsche
:this:

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 11:01 
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Paws for thought

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 17161
Location: Just Outside That London, England, Europe
linkless spludge.im warning you


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 11:09 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Location: Standing on your mother's Porsche
Really looking forward to your new weekly spot now, Dave.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Tue Apr 17, 2012 13:08 
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Grim... wrote:
Curiosity wrote:
When at home I shall make a list and ensure that the joy is shared round a bit more.

WTB still has to do it this week, though.

:D

"HERE ARE THE RULES FOR 'HAVING FUN'. PAY ATTENTION."

Let people go onto a 'do not nom me' list if they want to, but otherwise people should be able to nom who they like.

Unless it's for guidance purposes only, of course.


I was just joking, by the way! I don't really mind doing it. It'll still be late, though...


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 13:31 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Location: Standing on your mother's Porsche
Not long to go now.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 14:05 
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Ticket to Ride World Champion

Joined: 18th Apr, 2008
Posts: 11897
WTF, this is late?

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 16:22 
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It'll be here soon! (ish)


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 16:59 
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Hello Hello Hello

Joined: 11th May, 2008
Posts: 13386
Worst BEEX WEEX ever.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 17:00 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

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Nah, that'd be one of mine.

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I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 17:09 
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Hibernating Druid

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He'd better have at least two dildos in his mouth.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 17:16 
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I don't have any!


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 17:17 
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Hibernating Druid

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
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Location: Standing on your mother's Porsche
Should have tied string around them.

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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 17:19 
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Well she did warn me, but I assumed you'd be paying her a visit at the weekend any way. Oh, and she told me to let you know that Sunday dinner is cancelled this week.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 18:09 
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Hello Hello Hello

Joined: 11th May, 2008
Posts: 13386
How can anyone in a relationship not have a dildo or two and a Rampant Rabbit?

I like to think I know my way around a fanny, but some things technology can do that a human being can't.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 18:12 
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That's what she said.


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 Post subject: Re: BEEX WEEX
PostPosted: Fri Apr 20, 2012 18:17 
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Bad Girl

Joined: 20th Apr, 2008
Posts: 14416
AtrocityExhibition wrote:
How can anyone in a relationship not have a dildo or two and a Rampant Rabbit?

I like to think I know my way around a fanny, but some things technology can do that a human being can't.


Yeah, like virtual 3D worlds where you shoot man in face, but pleasure a fanny? That's where I'm king.


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