Be Excellent To Each Other

Would you eat a pigeon? I don't think I would. I don't think I could look past the filth infested pigeons I see in town.

I've eaten pigeon before. It's OK.

Meh. You buy cheap meat you makes your gamble. At least it's meat that someone somewhere eats. Imagine if it was roadkill or panda babies or homeless kiddies.

Horse? *gallic shrug*

They don't use feral pigeons mate! (Well, not sure about Tesco... )

Wood pigeons are a completely different type of bird (larger, much plumper, rural, far less tame and living off a natural, healthy diet instead of human garbage). They're actually pretty good to eat, much like many other game birds. Pheasant is really good too, I think, even though it's basically almost rotten by the time its edible. Best not to think of such things.

Eh? Fish are awesome for eating.
Clearly you are broken.

I am broken in that respect. I really like the taste of lots of fish but then my brain goes "It's fish! in your mouth!" and it gets spat out. If you tell me it is chicken I am fine with it. no, I don't know, either.

As I said originally, I really wouldn't mind so much if the packaging/listed ingredients were at least honest and accurate. Personally, I'd never knowingly eat horse, any more than I'd eat dog (unless starving of course). They're beautiful, noble creatures IMO.

I have the same problem with fish. Salmon makes me retch. I'm a cheap date

Country homeless kiddies, or urban homeless kiddies?

50% of each.

Unlikely, due to prions. prions are my biggest fear.

Rumour has it that Craster has eaten badger.

[gets coat]

What if I guaranteed no head meat?

Horse can still be roadkill.

By roadkill, I mean that greyish meat that's been there a while

He's only been in Malaysia for three days, dude.

When I left him with his hangover on Sunday he looked a fair bit like grayish meat that had been there for a while.

... This is all horses for courses, I guess.


[fetches coat]

Neigh, lad. Neigh

I don't see the problem with horse meet. Surely it's just part of a stable diet?

Nah. It's a bit of a 'mare, I'd say. Stuff like that gives me the galloping shits.

Bzzt. Repetition.

*Long face*

You're the mane man

"He's a dark horse eh?"
"Who's that?"
"THIS FUCKING TESCO BURGER"

**** Brrrrrrring!! ****

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!

Hopefully all these puns don't go on furlong.

If they do, we'll hoof them out.

I'll probably get saddled with deleting them all.

Nag, nag, nag.

Don't make me pommel you.

This should be in the neigh thread.

Bzzt. Repetition.

Tsk. I dunno why the scientists would want to dobbin the supermarkets anyway.

It won't be long the urge to make puns withers, there's no need to stifle them. If we had a poll, I'm sure it would be allowed - we're already scraping the bottom of the barrel.

*puts on horse's head*

If toffs rode cows there'd be an outcry over beef contaminating the horse burgers. And then everyone would feed their cats beef anyway.

Anyway, we've all had kebabs, so who's worrying about unexpected horsemeat?

Yeah, but there IS a dilemma here.

If I'd bought some of these burgers and subsequently found out they were horsemeat, I couldn't eat them. But that would mean I'd have to chuck them away.

So then, the question is, what bin would I need to use for this? How does this vary from one municipal authority to the next? What colour is it?

I think we should be told.

Wouldn't you just feed them to your servants?

Lulz, I think not mate.
If you ever see me IRL I seriously doubt you'll still think I am the kind of bloke to have servants.

Has Tesco trotted out an apology yet?

No, they're probably still chewing the cud on that score. That aside, an internal inquiry is going on - they're looking for the grass.

*bzzzzt* - Factual inaccuracy! Horses are not ruminants, and do not chew the cud! They do, however, use hindgut fermentation instead of a multi-chambered stomach, processing cellulose in an enlarged Cecum. I can't think of pun for that though.

Your mum processes cellulose in an enlarged cecum.

All night long.

I stand corrected! Nicely done sir.

Horse shit.

...I'm assuming the term "enlarged cecum" isn't just a euphemism for "spunk bowser" here.

Although, interestingly, if you put them in a field with cows for long enough they'll start to copy the action of doing so.