Bits and Bobs 34

Dimrill · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 16:50

metalangel wrote:

"(It was) the same density as icecream, like a squidgy runny form, a thick sauce kind of effect, think chocolate ice cream being mixed into a glop."

That's not runny. THIS is runny: my dog Biddy had the squits so bad that when she jumped off my bed once she shat backwards in a jet onto the wall. Completely ruined my Winona Ryder poster >:(

Zardoz · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 17:07

I bet I could do a hotter, runnier shit if I jumped off your bed.

Dimrill · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 17:13

That wouldn't be shit now would it?

TheVision · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 17:14

Isn't it time for Bits 'n Bobs 35 yet?

Zardoz · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 17:18

Dimrill wrote:

That wouldn't be shit now would it?

It'd be pretty shit for you if you were still in it.

TheVision · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 17:21

Most of the people at work are watching the "footy" leaving me to be a nerd. This involves wearing my glasses, avoiding the football and playing with my phone. Ace.

The nerdiest part is that it's a Windows phone.

Dimrill · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 17:25

Make sure you say "Glaven!" every now and then.

metalangel · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 17:27

Zardoz wrote:

I bet I could do a hotter, runnier shit if I jumped off your washing machine after eating a really hot curry that you'd heated inside your boiler.

Obvious Feex.

Mr Dave · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 18:17

Zardoz wrote:

Mr Dave wrote:

This thread is both making me feel ill and making me enormously glad I will never own a dog.

Here's an anectdote for you Dave.

Years ago we were offered the chance to look after a friend of Mrs Z's house (before we had our own home so we jumped at the chance). They had two dogs and due to the hours both of them worked the backroom was basically a furnished kennel so they had somewhere to come into if the weather was bad outside. It looked and smelled like a scene out of Hostle but with the blood replaced with piss and shit stains. The dogs themselves were very friendly but I refused to let the things near us after I went outside for a fag and witnessed one of them chomping down the others freshly laid shit like a snake swallowing eggs.

We never went there again.

And people think it's cute when dogs lick peoples faces.

Satsuma · **Joined:** 20th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 14419

My favourite scenes from Louis Theroux last night:

*woman getting shagged for an "up market" skin flick* Yes, Yes, YES, YES!

*director* Can you do it less, um, porno?

And also:

*porn actress trying to convince her stay at home boyfriend that she really MUST do the scene where 5 guys shoot a load each over her face* I COULD WIN AN AWARD!

metalangel · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 18:40

Mr Dave wrote:

And people think it's cute when dogs lick peoples faces.

They're trying to make you vomit so they can eat the vom.

Kern · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 18:53

Just been fiddling with my rarely-used Twitter account. Somewhat brilliantly, the Band of the Blues and Royals 'favourited' my 9 May tweet that said I'd just watched the State Opening of Parliament. Oddly, its immediate follow-up wasn't:

Attachment:

tweet1.JPG

And just to prove I'm not making this up:

Attachment:

tweet2.JPG

Dimrill · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 19:09

Ian Fairies wrote:

My favourite scenes from Louis Theroux last night:

*woman getting shagged for an "up market" skin flick* Yes, Yes, YES, YES!

*director* Can you do it less, um, porno?

And also:

*porn actress trying to convince her stay at home boyfriend that she really MUST do the scene where 5 guys shoot a load each over her face* I COULD WIN AN AWARD!

Grot thread's over there, man.

Satsuma · **Joined:** 20th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 14419

Is that the thread where we recommend stuff we've had alone time with? I don't dare look.

Grim... · **Posted:** Mon Jun 11, 2012 21:52

Dimrill wrote:

Completely ruined my Winona Ryder poster >:(

LLOL

YOG · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 1:13

http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2012- ... hinori-ono

Great interview with Yoshinori Ono (SFIV producer chap), here.

Quote:

"Capcom doesn't allow a trade union or any sort of worker movement you see," he says, giggling. "So if I complain I will probably get sacked. You have to say it for me, OK? I want you to write: 'Capcom overworks Ono'. That's your headline."

I'd be interested in finding out how many more game companies operate in this way. Preventing their workers from unionising, etc.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 8:11

I've got many insect bites on my calves from the ride on Sunday. They are exceedingly irritating.

nickachu · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 8:47

Dimrill wrote:

Ian Fairies wrote:

My favourite scenes from Louis Theroux last night:

*woman getting shagged for an "up market" skin flick* Yes, Yes, YES, YES!

*director* Can you do it less, um, porno?

And also:

*porn actress trying to convince her stay at home boyfriend that she really MUST do the scene where 5 guys shoot a load each over her face* I COULD WIN AN AWARD!

Grot thread's over there, man.

That was on TV last night here too. Was it a new louis theroux?

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 8:51

Yeah. I watched it last night. I thought it was really sad.

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

I saw a bit of it. Most of the people he talked to were seriously damaged. The older guy (Tommy) who seemed to be desperately trying to justify his life with quasi-philosophical rambling was particularly affecting. When he was giving life advice to an 18 year old girl who he was probably just about to fuck six ways from sunday, the bleakness of it was almost comical.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 9:08

DavPaz wrote:

I saw a bit of it. Most of the people he talked to were seriously damaged. The older guy (Tommy) who seemed to be desperately trying to justify his life with quasi-philosophical rambling was particularly affecting. When he was giving life advice to an 18 year old girl who he was probably just about to fuck six ways from sunday, the bleakness of it was almost comical.

There was an overwhelming sense of pathos there. Pretty much everyone was deluding themselves on way or another. However, everybody did seem to be friendly and approachable. The film director guy was perhaps the most normal, I did enjoy his attitude towards what he was doing, even if it seemed to be more resigned to it than anything else.

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

I think being open and friendly is a useful trait in a porn star, dude.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 9:11

DavPaz wrote:

I think being open and friendly is a useful trait in a porn star, dude.

I think it's a good quality in all people.

I'm all about people, today, and how great they are.

YAY! People!

Zardoz · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 10:06

Hurray!

Trooper · **Joined:** 4th Mar, 2010 **Posts:** 22397

Non crushed double deckers in the snack cupboard today!

Hurray!

KovacsC · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 12:26

Back on the diet this week

flis · **Joined:** 26th May, 2008 **Posts:** 3333

MaliA wrote:

DavPaz wrote:

I saw a bit of it. Most of the people he talked to were seriously damaged. The older guy (Tommy) who seemed to be desperately trying to justify his life with quasi-philosophical rambling was particularly affecting. When he was giving life advice to an 18 year old girl who he was probably just about to fuck six ways from sunday, the bleakness of it was almost comical.

There was an overwhelming sense of pathos there. Pretty much everyone was deluding themselves on way or another. However, everybody did seem to be friendly and approachable. The film director guy was perhaps the most normal, I did enjoy his attitude towards what he was doing, even if it seemed to be more resigned to it than anything else.

Hmm, I haven't seen it and as much as it sounds interesting, I think it'd be a bit like watching a programme on where sausages come from an how they're made.

Dimrill · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 12:57

"I've been playing the same game of Civilization II for ten years" brilliance.

Dimrill · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 13:16

Worst excuse for tax evasion I've ever heard.

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

Dimrill wrote:

"I've been playing the same game of Civilization II for ten years" brilliance.

Legendary. I've played some long games, but not that long. I always go for the quick kill through superior arms. Using Fundamentalism, natch.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 14:33

DavPaz wrote:

Dimrill wrote:

"I've been playing the same game of Civilization II for ten years" brilliance.

Legendary. I've played some long games, but not that long. I always go for the quick kill through superior arms. Using Fundamentalism, natch.

YOU SHOULD COLLABORATE WITH YOUR NEIGHBOURS AS WORKING TOGETHER HUMANKIND CAN GO TO SPACE AND BEYOND! GO GO GO TEAM MANKIND!

KovacsC · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 14:37

Dimrill wrote:

"I've been playing the same game of Civilization II for ten years" brilliance.

That is great...

Zardoz · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 15:08

Zardoz wrote:

markg wrote:

Sat in the office listening to the audiobook of I, Partridge and trying not to chuckle too loud. It's amazing :DD

I must get hold of that.

This is fucking brilliant. Just been sat in my car laughing like a lunatic.

Dimrill · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 15:19

With your potentially paedophilic mouth.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 15:32

See you around...

KovacsC · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 15:35

Time to revise for my ILIL v3 exam...... so excitied

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49244

You might want to start by learning the initials

KovacsC · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 15:38

lol......

I have my revision notes open as well....!!

KovacsC · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 15:41

I did this course in August when I visited Malia for a beer or 5!!

It was so fun!

Zardoz · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 15:44

KovacsC wrote:

Time to revise for my ILIL v3 exam...... so excitied

Cool, J.

TheVision · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 16:24

I've just appeared in my companies corporate video. I was supposed to do one piece to camera but ended up doing 3 because they thought I was so good. I even had props to deal with too.

It wasn't as exciting as my Beex Weex but still... Another string to my acting career.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 16:38

What 'props' did you have to 'deal with' in this 'corporate video'?

TheVision · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 16:51

Well, I had to chuck a hand grenade while shouting for vengence. Hang onto a moving taxi while it rolled through the streets of Dudley and operate a mini gun against a moving army of orcs.

Either that or open a photocopier, tap on a keyboard and shake some paper.

I forget now...

zaphod79 · **Joined:** 16th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 14518

TheVision wrote:

Well, I had to chuck a hand grenade while shouting for vengence. Hang onto a moving taxi while it rolled through the streets of Dudley and operate a mini gun against a moving army of orcs.

Either that or open a photocopier, tap on a keyboard and shake some paper.

I forget now...

You need to take the video when it actually comes out and replace the images of the actions you did from the list above with the actions you did *not* do from the list - and then post it on here :-)

TheVision · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 17:01

Pah.. I wish I'd gone for something a bit easier now, otherwise I would have done it.

Pundabaya · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 5016

I bet you were all 'I've worked with a star of TV programmes watched by millions, I know what to do! Oh, his name, uh *cough*Al Snow*cough*'

Hearthly · **Joined:** 11th May, 2008 **Posts:** 13386

KovacsC wrote:

Dimrill wrote:

"I've been playing the same game of Civilization II for ten years" brilliance.

That is great...

Heh, fab stuff.

I remember being completely fucking consumed by Civ2 back in the day.

Never got into any of the ones after that even half as much, not sure why.

ApplePieOfDestiny · **Joined:** 17th Dec, 2008 **Posts:** 8293

Oops. Just had to inform a fairly well known comedian on twitter that the reason his train stopped suddenly and isn't moving is because they hit someone, before he went down an inappropriate route with it (no announcement on train by the sound of it).

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Jun 12, 2012 22:47

I'm really bored of being at home alone now. To the extent I'm watching newsnight.

Warhead · Noob as of 6/8/10

Isn't the pr0n button on yer pooter working?

Be Excellent To Each Other

Bits and Bobs 34
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