The Grot, Grumble and Scud thread

flis · **Joined:** 26th May, 2008 **Posts:** 3333

ElephantBanjoGnome wrote:

MetalAngel needs to get back in here and post a load of links to get this topic back on track. Tits, man.

Sorry.

Yeah, more tits!

Satsuma · **Joined:** 20th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 14419

So anyway this big fatties hand dwafted my cock like the opening of Star Wars.

kalmar · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 15:12

ElephantBanjoGnome wrote:

She had a 'friend' who was amenable to fucking some random guy she'd never met. From what I came to understand the two of them would occasionally go at it alone when she was single, yet she also utterly refused to consider herself bisexual.

Yeah, thats really weird and unusual. Like maybe a third of all women

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

flis wrote:

Malabelm wrote:

The very thought of me and Flis :spew:

You really are filthy...Can you do that over my tits while you fuck my arse?

Hang on. Oh, how embarrassing.

That... I can't quite picture how that would be physically possible.

flis · **Joined:** 26th May, 2008 **Posts:** 3333

DavPaz wrote:

flis wrote:

Malabelm wrote:

The very thought of me and Flis :spew:

You really are filthy...Can you do that over my tits while you fuck my arse?

Hang on. Oh, how embarrassing.

That... I can't quite picture how that would be physically possible.

What? Puking on someones tits while fucking their arse...?

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

Yep. Show me...

Cavey · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 15:24

... Seriously, are there people out there that like being barfed on, whilst being "chutney shuffled"?

Man, I really am sexually naive. You'd need a crackingly good washing machine and a hefty stockpile of Vanish in that house. "Trust pink" indeed. :DD

flis · **Joined:** 26th May, 2008 **Posts:** 3333

DavPaz wrote:

Yep. Show me...

You can have bumsex while lying on your back, you don't have to be a contortionist. I'll show you in March Watch some porn, it happens loads.

Malabelm · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 15:45

DavPaz wrote:

Yep. Show me...

You're so adorable :kiss:

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

Malabelm wrote:

DavPaz wrote:

Yep. Show me...

You're so adorable :kiss:

Yep. Show me.

*unzips*

zaphod79 · **Joined:** 16th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 14518

DavPaz wrote:

Malabelm wrote:

DavPaz wrote:

Yep. Show me...

You're so adorable :kiss:

Yep. Show me.

*unzips*

If you'd like to lie down there and get comfortable - Flis will be along shortly to peg you.

metalangel · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 16:45

flis wrote:

Yeah, more tits!

TITS (NSFW)

flis wrote:

You can have bumsex while lying on your back, you don't have to be a contortionist. I'll show you in March Watch some porn, it happens loads.

Up the bum while on her back (13:45 in) NSFW

Up the bum while on her back (8:52 in) NSFW

Just missionary position but lift your legs slightly.

Cavey · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 16:54

Any upchucking going on? Otherwise it don't count.

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

Captain Caveman wrote:

Any upchucking going on? Otherwise it don't count.

Only from Gnomes

ElephantBanjoGnome · **Joined:** 22nd Dec, 2010 **Posts:** 8175

Idea for porno: A threesome. One girl with the squits takes it up the arse before switching around, and then the other takes it too deep down the throat, spews all over everyone, and everything. Then they all just keep going.

Probably already been done.

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

Google SWAP.avi.

Actually... don't.

ElephantBanjoGnome · **Joined:** 22nd Dec, 2010 **Posts:** 8175

Quote:

swap avi

a shock scat movie (50 minutes long) in which 4 brazilian sluts shit into each others anuses, shit back out the shit, eat the shit, vomit onto each other, vomit into their assholes, suck the vomit out of their assholes, etc. far worse than 2girls1cup OR 2girls1finger.

2 girls 1 finger? Never seen whatever the hell that is.

metalangel · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 17:11

DavPaz wrote:

Google SWAP.avi.

Actually... don't.

Yeah, it's worse than 2girls1cup. :spew:

2girls1finger is very fucked up too.

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49244

Wasn't the story of SWAP something like some brazilian porn studio saying "You order it, we'll make it", and the denizens of B3ta or somewhere similar decided to take up the challenge? Or is that a myth?

metalangel · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 17:19

It was SomethingAwful who did it.

http://www.somethingawful.com/d/horrors ... wapavi.php

Dimrill · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 17:20

If it was b3ta it'd be arses from /talk. The boring shits. I suspect it was 4chan *spits* though.

ElephantBanjoGnome · **Joined:** 22nd Dec, 2010 **Posts:** 8175

metalangel wrote:

2girls1finger is very fucked up too.

Synopsis please.

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

ElephantBanjoGnome wrote:

metalangel wrote:

2girls1finger is very fucked up too.

Synopsis please.

( + )( + ) :spew:

( + )( + )

Cavey · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 17:33

Lads at work tried to show me a video clip called "The Big Lunch" one time, basically some large-breasted, semi-naked woman in a nurses uniform (for reasons that remain unclear to me), eating a huge human turd from a carefully packed lunchbox.

I think I managed 6 secs. before it was either a case of looking away/running so I could not hear the audio, or projectile boiking Exorcist-style on the spot. I have never, ever seen anything so utterly foul in my entire life. :spew:

ElephantBanjoGnome · **Joined:** 22nd Dec, 2010 **Posts:** 8175

Nurses with big tits are disgusting I agree.

Actually the threesome happy slappy ex I mentioned earlier was a nurse, with big tits. Pretty sure she didn't eat shit though.

metalangel · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 17:40

ElephantBanjoGnome wrote:

Actually the threesome happy slappy ex I mentioned earlier was a nurse, with big tits. Pretty sure she didn't eat shit though.

Only your pet mouse does that.

ElephantBanjoGnome · **Joined:** 22nd Dec, 2010 **Posts:** 8175

No no you moron, only the snake does that. Sheesh. Did none of you pay attention to the cartoons?

Dimrill · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 17:52

I watch much sicker porn than you while eating much hotter food, garrotting Rodafowa with my floppy cock shaft, and having the biggest shit in the world.

Mr Russell · **Joined:** 6th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 12340

Dimrill wrote:

I watch much sicker porn than you while eating much hotter food, garrotting Rodafowa with my floppy cock shaft, and having the biggest shit in the world.

Links pls.

metalangel · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 19:11

The infamous link that BROKE ZARDOZ.

DO NOT VISIT IT. NSFW FUCKED UP STUFF.

prolapseparty.net

(the name should be enough of a hint to not visit it)

flis · **Joined:** 26th May, 2008 **Posts:** 3333

metalangel wrote:

The infamous link that BROKE ZARDOZ.

DO NOT VISIT IT. NSFW FUCKED UP STUFF.

prolapseparty.net

(the name should be enough of a hint to not visit it)

*Adds to favourites*

Cavey · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 19:22

I am so not clicking that.

Pundabaya · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 5016

A question: men like 'lesbian' porn, do women like gay porn?

Grim... · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 20:19

I don't like lesbian pie.

Hahaha autocorrect!

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49244

Mmmm. Pie.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 20:23

It didn't break me, but it certainly didn't encourage me to massage Kojak.

I've never eaten Dragon fruit since.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 20:25

Pundabaya wrote:

A question: men like 'lesbian' porn, do women like gay porn?

Lesbians are gay.

Malabelm · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 20:40

Grim... wrote:

I don't like lesbian pie.

Hahaha autocorrect!

I think we've been over this one before. It doesn't do much for me. I need cock :hat:

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38669

The x-art lesbo stuff is very good.

Generally though, I'm with Malabelm. I HEART COCK

metalangel · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 21:51

Found this the other day:

NSFW Link

Two 'real' looking girls having quite sensual lesbian sex for nearly an hour.

flis · **Joined:** 26th May, 2008 **Posts:** 3333

DavPaz wrote:

The x-art lesbo stuff is very good.

Generally though, I'm with Malabelm. I HEART COCK

Twice as much cock in gay porn, be right up your street, that.

I thought the same was true of most men, the preference for regular, straight porn?

One of the joiners at work was telling me about some "documentary" he watched, where they monitored the brain activity and heart rate of a number of men and women while getting them to watch porn. The men all responded to the straight porn, some to lesbian porn, no response to gay porn; they showed them animals mating too, allegedly - no response. Then they showed the same stuff to the women. He reckoned all of them responded, to some degree, to everything.

devilman · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 22:30

flis wrote:

One of the joiners at work was telling me about some "documentary" he watched, where they monitored the brain activity and heart rate of a number of men and women while getting them to watch porn. The men all responded to the straight porn, some to lesbian porn, no response to gay porn; they showed them animals mating too, allegedly - no response. Then they showed the same stuff to the women. He reckoned all of them responded, to some degree, to everything.

That just proves that women like watching telly.

Trooper · **Joined:** 4th Mar, 2010 **Posts:** 22397

devilman wrote:

flis wrote:

One of the joiners at work was telling me about some "documentary" he watched, where they monitored the brain activity and heart rate of a number of men and women while getting them to watch porn. The men all responded to the straight porn, some to lesbian porn, no response to gay porn; they showed them animals mating too, allegedly - no response. Then they showed the same stuff to the women. He reckoned all of them responded, to some degree, to everything.

That just proves that women like watching telly.

Bobbyaro · **Joined:** 18th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 11902

devilman wrote:

flis wrote:

One of the joiners at work was telling me about some "documentary" he watched, where they monitored the brain activity and heart rate of a number of men and women while getting them to watch porn. The men all responded to the straight porn, some to lesbian porn, no response to gay porn; they showed them animals mating too, allegedly - no response. Then they showed the same stuff to the women. He reckoned all of them responded, to some degree, to everything.

That just proves that women like watching telly.

sod post of the week, that's post of the year! Brilliant!

Grim... · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 23:07

flis wrote:

One of the joiners at work was telling me about some "documentary" he watched, where they monitored the brain activity and heart rate of a number of men and women while getting them to watch porn. The men all responded to the straight porn, some to lesbian porn, no response to gay porn; they showed them animals mating too, allegedly - no response. Then they showed the same stuff to the women. He reckoned all of them responded, to some degree, to everything.

I saw that, and he's pretty much spot on.

Dimrill · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 23:09

Grim... wrote:

I saw that, and he's pretty much spot on.

Have you done similar experiments with a wide variety of test subjects and came to the same conclusions as well?

Grim... · **Posted:** Thu Feb 02, 2012 23:10

Dimrill wrote:

Grim... wrote:

I saw that, and he's pretty much spot on.

Have you done similar experiments with a wide variety of test subjects and came to the same conclusions as well?

I'd probably have said "I've tried that" if that were the case.

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49244

I thought you meant you compared your results to his, and found them identical other than yours having been written in crayon.

GovernmentYard · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 5318

metalangel wrote:

Found this the other day:

NSFW Link

Two 'real' looking girls having quite sensual lesbian sex for nearly an hour.

Dykes take bloody ages it's annoying when one gets drunk and goes straight for a few hours it's like 'fucking change actions already I'm starting to think about work tomorrow'.

GovernmentYard · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 5318

It's possible to come on someone's tits while fucking them up the arse if they're a bit bendy. Simply shoot your muck so hard it traverses the entire alimentary canal, whereupon she leans as far forward as she can go and lets it dribble out.

Presto!

Will also work on boys but with less impressive tits in the majority of cases.

Be Excellent To Each Other

The Grot, Grumble and Scud thread
Probably NSFW pr0n babble

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Be Excellent To Each Other

The Grot, Grumble and Scud thread Probably NSFW pr0n babble

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The Grot, Grumble and Scud thread
Probably NSFW pr0n babble