We're going to get hammered, aren't we?

Quite possibly. Although all the pundits on Sky seem to think we'll win the series though - not quite sure why. I'm guessing rain's going to interrupt this first test a bit though.

I'd just like to get a post in commenting on my surprised that England have yet to lose a wicket and to inevitably jinx them.

10 minutes after posting that, they lose a wicket.

Still, bloody good day's play. Tremendous character from Bell; he's facing the axe, and he comes to the crease after 3 wickets go in 13 balls, and smashes a four of his first ball. As for KP, what can you say? This innings has tipped his test average over 50. I think Paul Harris is going to have a very shonky tour.

I have tickets for Headingly next Sunday (Day 3) - I'm now slightly less worried that the test will already be over by then.

Phenomenal. The SA bowlers will have their day yet, I'm sure, but if I'd drawn up a list of possibles for the first couple of days play, this would not have figured on it.

I just hope the rain holds off enough to lead to a result in this one. Ideally, England can get SA all out before reaching a follow-on but if England are batting well, then who's to say SA won't too?

Another excellent day for England and the first time I've watched more or less a whole day's play (er, with the occasional short nap) so middle-age is fast approaching.

Alas, not so good today.

I watched the first hour yesterday and made the correct decision in saying "this is going to be boring" and switching off.

WTF is Vaughn doing!

Malc

Being a walking wicket. He's in atrocious form at the moment... worse than Collingwood, who we dropped.

Another bad decision to get rid of Cook though. We've had three absolute stinkers so far, out of (at the time) the 9 wickets we'd lost all series.

Boo, umpires, boo!

looks like we just got one in our favour tho...

Malc

Dirty Saffa AB De Villain trying to cheat! Naughty boy! Even Batting Idiot Vaughan saw it had been grounded from the balcony!

one two three for five


Malc

Did anyone in the entire country of England (or indeed the world) think it was going to be a good idea to bat Ambrose, a man proven to be very poor with the bat and half expected to drop down to #8, below Broad, at #6?

He's not even a village #6, let alone at Test level!

not looking good

Malc

All we can hope is that this succession of horrific shots were caused by the pitch... not by having idiotic batsmen.

indeed

Malc

Anyone still watching it?

I was at the ground today. Barring two short showers of beer, good weather. Glad I wasn't there yesterday.

I don't mind the South Africans winning, I just wish they weren't so dull to watch batting - absolutely glacial strike rates. Still, had a good day - enjoyed seeing all the players in the flesh, sitting in a crowd full of people laughing along to TMS, and seeing how hard it is to tell if a player is in/out from the crowd perspective.

The antics in the Western Terrace were also quite amusing, initially. A bit annoyed that by the time the cricket got more interesting, they were already so trolleyed and rowdy that they wouldn't pay attention. I'm fairly sure their noisyness contributed to Strauss' poor shot.

Cricket gets interesting? Wow, who knew?

BETEO has trolls? Wow, who knew?

Here's an idea - why not go to a Nintendo forum and make posts about how the PS3 is a better console? It'll be hilarious, and incredibly original! OMGROFLCOPTERLOL.

I agree superficially with your point, which was well-made, but all sports are essentially silly games, and I simply prefer other sports to cricket. Cricket's reputation as boring has, however, made it a traditional target for sarcasm and jokes. It was this tradition I was following in my post above, which was light hearted and not serious at all. Good job you agreed with me, instead of over-reacting like a twat, though.

Steady on lads.

Anyway, as someone who just watched Tests 3 and 4 from the Ashes 2005 series on DVD last night, I can confirm that Cricket is not a boring sport, though it does sometimes have boring matches. As does football, rugby and any other sport you care to name.

But unlike the boring bit of the first test, a boring football, rugby, whatever match doesn't last 2 days.

And unlike the Test matches I mentioned, there isn't tension and excitement for five freaking days at a footy match.

Cricket... it was the best of sports, it was the worst of sports...

Watching Cricket is about sitting down in the sun, and drinking a lovely pint of beer. Watching a slow burning game, and shouting abuse at Australians.

We gave the Aussies some sterling abuse at The Oval during The Ashes. There was a guy who looked like Jason Gillespie sat behind us, supporting Australia. The 'caravan' chants and jokes never got old.

I was at Old Trafford for the final day of the 2005 Ashes test. The one where 10,000 people were locked out before 10am.

A wonderful day in the sun, a tense game, Ricky Pontings magnificent innings and a draw at the death. Marvellous. Although I'll never forgive Harmison for that final over. Not one of the deliveries would have hit the stumps!

This isn't exactly England vs South Africa, but seems the best thread to put this in.

I played in an interdepartmental cricket match last night for work. We set a total of 119 from 20 overs (I scored a no-ball duck thanks to being run out without facing). With 2 overs left they had 113 and looked to be cruising - we ended up winning by 1 run!

My bowling figures were 2-0-1-15. Batting 0 from 0, obv.

Two things:

1 - Isn't that TWICE now you've eben run out without facing a ball? You utter buffoon.

2 - That's not how you write bowling figures! (is it?)

infinity%!

1 - Yes, what of it?

2 - Yes it is: overs; maidens; wickets; runs. Unless someone wants to correct me?

You'd normally have runs then wickets as here for example.

Yes, I checked it after Curio queried it. They should read 2-0-15-1.

I thought I was right.

*poses*

You didn't exactly come up with the goods though, did you?

"That's wrong!"

"How should it be then?"

"It's just wrong!"

"Thanks for your help."

Obviously I knew what the right ones were, which is why I corrected you, silly.

You didn't correct me - you just said it was wrong. I could tell you that you were wrong about anything, but it's not correcting me unless you offer up the right answer.

Dummy.

How would I know it was wrong if I...

Oh, forget it. I'm now just going to murder Ange tomorrow night, and it's all your fault.

And I don't even need to pay you or anything?

England collapsing again? Who'd have thought it? I mean, I was totally expecting Vaughan to magic runs from somewhere and for Collingwood to weigh in heavily after he was sent back to his county to find runs and found, well, very little.

I'm sure that the likes of Shah, Bopara and Key are heartened by open selection process.

Damn.. forgot the cricket started again today.

Surely it's time to ditch Vaughan at the very least?

Mr Boycott sums it up.

Surprised to see Collingwood brought into the attack ahead of Panesar too.

Edit - Panesar is on now at least.

Fantastic recovery courtesy of Mr Flintoff, but I worry his foot is going to snap at the ankle every time I see him run in. I wish Broad was playing, but that may be sentimentality more than anything else, and the fact that I just love watching him bat.

For my money, I'd drop Ambrose and bring back Prior, and drop Colly and bring back Broad. I haven't quite decided about Vaughan yet.

Yes, Prior may fluff a few, but he's got the chops to bat at #6 - a dedicated wicket keeper isn't a luxury we can afford with our batting in the state it's in at the mo. Follow that up with Flintoff at 7 and Broad at 8, and you've got one of the most wag-worthy tails in world cricket.

Cook you muppet.

I wonder what Vaughan's gonna do this innings?

Malc

Get 17.

Great game but the better team won.

You've not been watching that ALL day?