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 Post subject: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:12 
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Skillmeister

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Man with tree growing in his lung?

http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=7343614

I'll have to cry bullshit on this.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:15 
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Commander-in-Cheese

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I'd be thinking that without light there'd be nothing promoting the tree to sprout.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:16 
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Skillmeister

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Exactly. Maybe because he's Russian, he has pasty translucent skin.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:16 
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baron of techno

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Craster wrote:
I'd be thinking that without light there'd be nothing promoting the tree to sprout.


Seed sprout in the dark when it's warm enough, it's the growing thereafter which is influenced by light.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:17 
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Hibernating Druid

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No, I think there's enough light in a human lung to sustain plant growth.

How else do you explain my thriving dangleberries?

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:17 
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Ready for action

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maybe he just took a really big sniff of a christmas tree, inhaling a two inch section which went up his nose, round a few wee bends and down into his lung whereby it nestled in amongst some lungy bits. So it didn't really grow there, just settled. Like an immigrant sort of.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:20 
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baron of techno

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Heh, lol etc :)


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:22 
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Skillmeister

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It looks a little too clean in the video. Surely the body would treat it as an infection and throw white blood cells at it and cover it in gopp? The entire thing strikes me like that Blue Jam sketch of the unnecessary surgery man. "I've got a sausage in my eye!"

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:35 
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Dimrill wrote:
Surely the body would treat it as an infection and throw white blood cells at it and cover it in gopp?
Maybe his lungs were pining to see the outside world & were overjoyed when the evergreen invader arrived.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:37 
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Unpossible!

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hmm, the whole story needles me a bit


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:38 
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Honey Boo Boo

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Yeah, I think it's better if we leave it for now.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:39 
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Dimrill wrote:
It looks a little too clean in the video. Surely the body would treat it as an infection and throw white blood cells at it and cover it in gopp?


For that to happen it would rather require that his lungs be full of blood. At that point I fear he has a more pressing issue.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:40 
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Unpossible!

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after watching it again, I'm growing rather frond of it.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:43 
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I read a debunk of this a few days ago. Not only could a seed not sprout in his lung, but with no light you'd get no green colouration as the chlorophyll wouldn't be active. The only conclusion was that he inhaled the entire lump, which sounds surprising but there are recorded cases of similar things happening with objects of the same size. Usually caused by someone having a severe coughing fit whilst eating and a stuff ending up being inhaled, but also industrial accidents. I wonder if he worked around trees.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:46 
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Hibernating Druid

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Your Science ruins everything! EVERYTHING!

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:47 
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Skillmeister

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He's robbing the world of magic!

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:47 
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Unpossible!

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yeah, it's just not FIR!

*packs trunk*

I'm branching out


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:49 
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Honey Boo Boo

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Whereas I'm turning in on myself, going back to my roots.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:51 
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baron of techno

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MetalAngel wrote:
Whereas I'm turning in on myself, going back to my roots.


I'm sure you'll have a ball.

(I said ball like a tree's root ball)


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:52 
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Hibernating Druid

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*draws a circle of salt around The Internets Infamous Richard Gaywood*

I gots him Dimrill! Now let's meld our magic beans and have done with him

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:54 
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Doctor Glyndwr wrote:
I read a debunk of this a few days ago. Not only could a seed not sprout in his lung, but with no light you'd get no green colouration as the chlorophyll wouldn't be active. The only conclusion was that he inhaled the entire lump, which sounds surprising but there are recorded cases of similar things happening with objects of the same size. Usually caused by someone having a severe coughing fit whilst eating and a stuff ending up being inhaled, but also industrial accidents. I wonder if he worked around trees.


There are species which will form green chlorophyll even in the absence of light. They are pretty much exclusively aquatic plants (they grow that way because the water in the stormy season is so clouded with muck that it is entirely opaque, but the plant knows that at the end of the season the light will begin to filter through again) rather than firs though.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:55 
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I'll have no trunk with this kind of carry on.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:56 
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Unpossible!

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Ah, the evergreen Craster, font of anti-gaywood knowledge

Gaywood's bark is wor*BANG!*

*slumps*


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 15:59 
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Skillmeister

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Beech oak pine birch hazel hawthorn bark trunk branch twig wood root knell grotto copse forest larch THE LARCH redwood trees TREES TREES FOR FUCKS SAKE TREES MAN!

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:01 
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Sleepyhead

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He's sycamore than most.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:02 
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Dimrill wrote:
Beech oak pine birch hazel hawthorn bark trunk branch twig wood root knell grotto copse forest larch THE LARCH redwood trees TREES TREES FOR FUCKS SAKE TREES MAN!

What's that? Couldn't see the trees for my wood

:hat:


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:05 
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Craster wrote:
There are species which will form green chlorophyll even in the absence of light. They are pretty much exclusively aquatic plants (they grow that way because the water in the stormy season is so clouded with muck that it is entirely opaque, but the plant knows that at the end of the season the light will begin to filter through again) rather than firs though.
Ah, yes, fair enough. This is clearly a chunk of fir tree though :D


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:07 
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Unpossible!

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*gropes for a wood/organ joke*

Zardoz? Take it man...


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:11 
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Hibernating Druid

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Ugh ugh, is that all you got? Ugh ugh

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:12 
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Excellent Member

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TREES CAN GROW IN LUNGZ>!>!???

SHIT TREES GORING IN ME FUCKING LUNGZ!!>!>!!!

/anxiety attack

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:13 
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nervouspete wrote:
TREES CAN GROW IN LUNGZ>!>!???

SHIT TREES GORING IN ME FUCKING LUNGZ!!>!>!!!

/anxiety attack

I should never have swallowed those apple pips...


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:14 
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Dimrill wrote:
He's robbing the world of magic!


Don't be so sappy.

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:20 
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Unpossible!

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I've just twigged! Tree puns! Again!


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:21 
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baron of techno

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You wooden't let it ply.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:22 
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Hibernating Druid

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*orders 100 gallons of Agent Orange from Army Surplus*

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:26 
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baron of techno

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Not as nice as Fentimans dude.


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:30 
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kalmar wrote:
You wooden't let it ply.


Please don't feel saw. :(

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 16:32 
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Unpossible!

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Keep going and you'll be in lumber, jack!


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 17:27 
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Honey Boo Boo

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This place sickens me.

*logs off*


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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 17:35 
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Skillmeister

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Of course if the tree had grown enough to bear fruit, I'm sure it'd be... *chuckle*... a chestnut tree. OH! OH!!

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 Post subject: Re: When trees go parasitic.
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 17:59 
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baron of techno

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:DD

You kill you.


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