And I fucking love guns and some wicked gun-fu, Christ almighty, I fucking live for John Wick… but the gunplay here is… boring. So far anyway, but I’m 50 minutes in. They do all the right flips and moves and shoot nice sounding guns but it’s all so, I dunno, without any tension whatsoever. Streams of baddies get cut down by indiscriminate gunfire and despite hundreds of AR rounds being fired no of the stormtroopers get close to hitting anything. Now, this is an awful trope that has to fucking die, but when you’ve got John fucking Wick himself on set and the first film for reference (well ok the second too, I guess, at a push), surely you can come up with an imaginative gunfight that doesn’t resolve around a) stormtroopers being unable to shoot anything and b) just doing a signature flip move from the old films in a boring gunfight and thinking that’ll fucking do.
Urgh…Zion. Urgh…”Bio Sky”. Urgh…science babble.
“Digitologist”
Grim... wrote:
Mimi wrote:
how Mrs Squirt is going to win her first Oscar.
I mean...
I don’t think they give out Oscars for those films, Grim…
I had to take a break from the Matrix as I had better things to do.
The Kung fu is blandly shot and manages to be worse than Matrix 2, especially since it’s riffing off Matrix 2. Yawn.
The Kung fu is blandly shot and manages to be worse than Matrix 2, especially since it’s riffing off Matrix 2. Yawn.
Of all the people I’d want returning from the Matrix, Jada Pinkett was right at the bottom…
ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!
Oh and why introduce and name some bloody robots? Just pointless filler. There’s a lot of that going on.
The “I don’t suppose you can still fly” moment is so goofy and stupid.
Appreciate the live blog, Sat, but any chance of spoiler Tagging it?
ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!
This end sequence better not be just Neo waving his hands around. This is fucking stupid.
And why reproduce the machine gun on the helicopter from the original bit but make it worse? Technology has moved on, not backwards hasn’t it? Must be, my PlayStations on 5 now init.
And why reproduce the machine gun on the helicopter from the original bit but make it worse? Technology has moved on, not backwards hasn’t it? Must be, my PlayStations on 5 now init.
Finished.
Conclusion: I’ve no idea why this is even a thing apart from obviously money. It pales in comparison to the original, isn’t even as good as 2 and is probably about the same as 3. Hell, I was probably more invested in 3 and that had a bloody cave sex orgy thing.
Conclusion: I’ve no idea why this is even a thing apart from obviously money. It pales in comparison to the original, isn’t even as good as 2 and is probably about the same as 3. Hell, I was probably more invested in 3 and that had a bloody cave sex orgy thing.
Jem and I watched The Good Liar last night, a recent movie that stars Helen Mirren and Ian McKellen.
McKellen plays an elderly man looking for love on a dating website, while Helen Mirren plays an elderly woman looking for love on the same dating website. What the audience soon discovers though (and this isn't a spoiler) is that McKellen's character is actually just a confidence trickster.
A great movie, from start to finish, with cracking performances from the two leads (as you'd expect given their careers!) and Russell Tovey also puts in a good turn as well as Mirren's grandson, wary of McKellen.
We also watched The Da Vinci Code, based on the infamous Dan Brown novel ("the big man drank from the red cup" Dan Brown) - Tom Hanks doesn't exactly bring his A game to this film, but between Audrey Tautou, Hanks and (coincidentally) Ian McKellen, it's pretty watchable - if predictable. I haven't read the novels but some of the "twists" were super obvious.
McKellen plays an elderly man looking for love on a dating website, while Helen Mirren plays an elderly woman looking for love on the same dating website. What the audience soon discovers though (and this isn't a spoiler) is that McKellen's character is actually just a confidence trickster.
A great movie, from start to finish, with cracking performances from the two leads (as you'd expect given their careers!) and Russell Tovey also puts in a good turn as well as Mirren's grandson, wary of McKellen.
We also watched The Da Vinci Code, based on the infamous Dan Brown novel ("the big man drank from the red cup" Dan Brown) - Tom Hanks doesn't exactly bring his A game to this film, but between Audrey Tautou, Hanks and (coincidentally) Ian McKellen, it's pretty watchable - if predictable. I haven't read the novels but some of the "twists" were super obvious.
The Dan Brown movies are my guilty pleasure. Bloody love em
Antlers: you can probably skip this horror by numbers.
Fast n Furious Hobbs and Shaw. Another one in the franchise, not about cars. Very silly, but we all enjoyed it 
I think the last one that was about cars was Tokyo Drift.
TheVision wrote:
I've been to the cinema!
We saw Enchanto from Disney. It looks amazing. The animation is silky smooth and the colours, man... The colours!
The story was a bit strange though. I thought I saw the ending coming but then it didn't. But it ended anyway. Strange.
We saw Enchanto from Disney. It looks amazing. The animation is silky smooth and the colours, man... The colours!
The story was a bit strange though. I thought I saw the ending coming but then it didn't. But it ended anyway. Strange.
We watched the first half of Encanto this evening. I love what we’ve seen so far. I love the character design of the women in the family and the various personalities. We only stoped as Darwin wanted to open a couple of Christmas presents before bed and have a board game, but hopefully we’ll watch the other half tomorrow (what better for a Boxing Day than a loaf on the sofa?)
We started watching 'don't look up' which is on Netflix.
It's crap. Don't bother.
It's crap. Don't bother.
TheVision wrote:
We started watching 'don't look up' which is on Netflix.
It's crap. Don't bother.
It's crap. Don't bother.
We watched it to the end. About 45 minutes too long but otherwise entertaining.
Watched. Matrix Resurrection. my goodness that was a bit meh. I got so bored watching it.
What a shame. It could have been good.
What a shame. It could have been good.
TheVision wrote:
We started watching 'don't look up' which is on Netflix.
It's crap. Don't bother.
It's crap. Don't bother.
Disagree, I thought it was great. Terrifyingly close to the bone, but great
Went to see Spielberg's remake of West Side Story last night. Excellent stuff and I'll probably stop humming the tunes some time in 2022. Bernstein's score remains as brilliant now as in the 1960s.
ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!
I saw the original was on TV the other day and haven’t seen it in *years* so almost put it in, as Russell has never seen it, but I may wait for this instead as he may find the remake more palatable.
Squirt wrote:
I heartily recommend Last Train to Christmas. Cary Elwes and Michael Sheen in a variety of wigs, a strange "Christmas Butterfly Effect" plot and my lovely lady wife in her first movie appearance! ( uncredited, but Robin Askwith is mean to her )
I watched this last night. Which was your missus?
Also, I completely forgot that was Elwes and was surprised when the credits rolled round
Don't Look Up is a masterpiece, one of the better films I've seen in quite a long time - 906/1000
I've avoided it because I think it would be depressing. I feel like a don't really need to see a film to know that the world is fucked and hardly anyone can be arsed to try and do a thing about it.
markg wrote:
I've avoided it because I think it would be depressing. I feel like a don't really need to see a film to know that the world is fucked and hardly anyone can be arsed to try and do a thing about it.
There's a very good article about it here, that makes this point, amongst others:
ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!
https://www.currentaffairs.org/2021/12/ ... tire-point
DavPaz wrote:
Squirt wrote:
I heartily recommend Last Train to Christmas. Cary Elwes and Michael Sheen in a variety of wigs, a strange "Christmas Butterfly Effect" plot and my lovely lady wife in her first movie appearance! ( uncredited, but Robin Askwith is mean to her )
I watched this last night. Which was your missus?
Also, I completely forgot that was Elwes and was surprised when the credits rolled round
She was in the scene where he's in short shorts shooting the advert, she's the one who gets moved and replaced by his daughter! It's a pivotal role, the whole plot revolves around her!
You can see the back of her head bottom right!
Having watched this movie I do believe that Mrs Squirt was the best performance in the whole thing.
Squirt wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
Squirt wrote:
I heartily recommend Last Train to Christmas. Cary Elwes and Michael Sheen in a variety of wigs, a strange "Christmas Butterfly Effect" plot and my lovely lady wife in her first movie appearance! ( uncredited, but Robin Askwith is mean to her )
I watched this last night. Which was your missus?
Also, I completely forgot that was Elwes and was surprised when the credits rolled round
She was in the scene where he's in short shorts shooting the advert, she's the one who gets moved and replaced by his daughter! It's a pivotal role, the whole plot revolves around her!
She's the emotional core of the movie. That's the moment that Tony decides to stop living for his own superficial needs
Props to your missus though. Peak extra work!
The new Spider-Man movie is brilliant fun.
Curiosity wrote:
The new Spider-Man movie is brilliant fun.
This. I cried. I laughed. I wept again. I didn't whoop (but a few fuckers did).
Findus Fop wrote:
Curiosity wrote:
The new Spider-Man movie is brilliant fun.
This. I cried. I laughed. I wept again. I didn't whoop (but a few fuckers did).
There weren't enough people in my screening to get an audience reaction, but it was a fine film indeed.
What's more, I managed to make it this far without being spoiled which is lucky.
Findus Fop wrote:
Curiosity wrote:
The new Spider-Man movie is brilliant fun.
This. I cried. I laughed. I wept again. I didn't whoop (but a few fuckers did).
Did you cheer and shart and fist pump the air?
Haha! Genuinely never seen that before.
Spiderman is just awesome, I took our 9 year old boy on a surprise trip to see it and he was, as expected, utterly enthralled by all of it... except for a kissy-scene.
Free Guy was entertaining as we thought it'd be, Ryan Reynolds does have that charm, but it was also a bit deeper and more moving than I expected (not by much, but it was really good)
Don't Look Up was a bit longer than necessary but still a solid film and did bring a touch of humour, but still a touch depressing. DiCaprio is watchable as ever, but after not long ago watching The Beach, the clear example of the passing of time makes me feel a bit sad and old.
Free Guy was entertaining as we thought it'd be, Ryan Reynolds does have that charm, but it was also a bit deeper and more moving than I expected (not by much, but it was really good)
Don't Look Up was a bit longer than necessary but still a solid film and did bring a touch of humour, but still a touch depressing. DiCaprio is watchable as ever, but after not long ago watching The Beach, the clear example of the passing of time makes me feel a bit sad and old.
West-Side Story. Between this and Matrix for the first of the day, and I think you all, especially Kern, saw me right. Gorgeous, and heart breaking.
Spiderman. Great fun, and I managed to ignore the talkative kids and parents in the audience as a result (my fault for going to Romford, which is edgy itself, and for not waiting till after the bank holiday because that sort of thing passes me by sometimes now).
Spiderman. Great fun, and I managed to ignore the talkative kids and parents in the audience as a result (my fault for going to Romford, which is edgy itself, and for not waiting till after the bank holiday because that sort of thing passes me by sometimes now).
I watched a film I enjoyed!
Spiderman: No Way Home. I was grinning from ear to ear when those dudes came through the portal and laughed so hard when dude is just standing there wearing his brown jacket looking old as shit.
They did an amazing job with all the villains and the main 3 were just great. William Defoe is like 66 years old and they made him look like a fucking boss. Apparently he even did some of his own stunts. What a superstar.
Not quite Infinity War but a really great time.
Spiderman: No Way Home. I was grinning from ear to ear when those dudes came through the portal and laughed so hard when dude is just standing there wearing his brown jacket looking old as shit.
They did an amazing job with all the villains and the main 3 were just great. William Defoe is like 66 years old and they made him look like a fucking boss. Apparently he even did some of his own stunts. What a superstar.
Not quite Infinity War but a really great time.
Red Notice managed to be simultaneously entertaining and a bit meh at the same time. Fun yet also rather ordinary.....
Four Christmases. Vince Vaughn and Reece, with a spoon. The former might tell you all you need to know, and it's not big, it's not clever, but it made me laugh a lot.
I watched Armageddon in its entirety for the first time yesterday. I’ve seen bits of it before but never the whole thing.
What an absolutely terrible movie, that could have been so much more. The whole film is edited in this really weird fast-paced quick-cut style that made me think of Nicolas Cage movies for some reason, and just in general it stretches the suspension of disbelief way too far. Ben Affleck is supremely irritating in it, too, mainly because he doesn’t really seem all that bothered about Bruce Willis’ character literally trying to shoot him with a shotgun at the start of the movie.
Decent special effects though I guess, and Steve Buscemi is always good value.
I then watched Chef, a movie directed by Jon Favreau, starring himself, John Leguizamo, Bobby Cannavale, Sofia Vergara and ScarJo (and with a kid actor that actually does a good job, who’s name I can’t remember)
This is actually a really nice movie, pretty straightforward and not massively interesting, but the cast play everything so well - the chemistry between Favreau and Leguizamo is electric, I can totally buy that those two have been buddies for years, and apparently Favreau went the extra mile in terms of training how to be a proper chef in prep for the movie, which adds quite a lot to the film.
Recommended.
What an absolutely terrible movie, that could have been so much more. The whole film is edited in this really weird fast-paced quick-cut style that made me think of Nicolas Cage movies for some reason, and just in general it stretches the suspension of disbelief way too far. Ben Affleck is supremely irritating in it, too, mainly because he doesn’t really seem all that bothered about Bruce Willis’ character literally trying to shoot him with a shotgun at the start of the movie.
Decent special effects though I guess, and Steve Buscemi is always good value.
I then watched Chef, a movie directed by Jon Favreau, starring himself, John Leguizamo, Bobby Cannavale, Sofia Vergara and ScarJo (and with a kid actor that actually does a good job, who’s name I can’t remember)
This is actually a really nice movie, pretty straightforward and not massively interesting, but the cast play everything so well - the chemistry between Favreau and Leguizamo is electric, I can totally buy that those two have been buddies for years, and apparently Favreau went the extra mile in terms of training how to be a proper chef in prep for the movie, which adds quite a lot to the film.
Recommended.
Chef is an absolute joy
Not a film I’d recommend watching on an empty stomach like I did though 
At least, now when you’re self-isolating and can’t immediately go out and hit up some street food vendor somewhere (not that there are any such places in our little town out in the middle of nowhere)
At least, now when you’re self-isolating and can’t immediately go out and hit up some street food vendor somewhere (not that there are any such places in our little town out in the middle of nowhere) There's a follow up cooking show on Netflix as well
Yeah, watching Chef was just about the only redeeming feature of my Christmas break. Great film.