Applied for a job to be a Police Station representative. Nice bit of criminal for me.
MaliA wrote:
Applied for a job to be a Police Station representative. Nice bit of criminal for me.
Good luck. I bet that would be really interesting work.
markg wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Applied for a job to be a Police Station representative. Nice bit of criminal for me.
Good luck. I bet that would be really interesting work.
Trouble is, I'm not accredited, but if I'm sure we can cross that bridge at some point. I need to find a solicitor doing that stuff, then watch them give advice, then I give advice and then they sign off and done. Shouldn't be too tricky.
Criminal can be interesting, the trickiest thing I always found is knowing when to tell people to not talk.
markg wrote:
MaliA wrote:
But it has been a while since I've done tort, so I'll go and get the book if you want to.
Nah, it's alright. I just never knew that the guiding principle was that you always have to have done something actually negligent to be liable. I'd kind of assumed that just by doing something with inherent risks to third parties that you'd be a bit liable when those risks materialise.
If you do shit to minimise/eliminate those risks, you're generally OK.
markg wrote:
Nah, it's alright. I just never knew that the guiding principle was that you always have to have done something actually negligent to be liable. I'd kind of assumed that just by doing something with inherent risks to third parties that you'd be a bit liable when those risks materialise.
You wouldn't be criminally liable but surely you could be sued, and lose?
That's why businesses need insurance, to protect against speculative action from no win-no fee type lawyers, you know the kind that advertise on daytime TV.
MaliA wrote:
Criminal can be interesting, the trickiest thing I always found is knowing when to tell people to not talk.
Isn't the correct answer pretty much "never"?
Not if spilling the goods on Johnny Pipewrench will get you reduced time for co-operating, innit?
Grim... wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Criminal can be interesting, the trickiest thing I always found is knowing when to tell people to not talk.
Isn't the correct answer pretty much "never"?
Adverse inferences can be drawn for not saying anything.
"I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason why the defendant was found at 1am, covered in the blood of the victim, and wielding a chainsaw, sadly, he has chosen to not enlighten us"
On the other hand you're only going to make matters worse if you try to talk your way out of that one.
kalmar wrote:
On the other hand you're only going to make matters worse if you try to talk your way out of that one.
"Happy Hallowe'en!"
Grim... wrote:
MaliA wrote:
Criminal can be interesting, the trickiest thing I always found is knowing when to tell people to not talk.
Isn't the correct answer pretty much "never"?
Don't talk, just kiss.
MaliA wrote:
UK "growth "figures have just been released - 0.5% contraction
Double-dip here we come.
Double-dip here we come.
Narp. The press/BBC are gleefully jumping on the first part of this non-story and then quietly mumbling the rest. These figures are for the three months that include the bad weather, during that time production and sales went up to the expected norm for the Christmas period but construction is also included in the data - that fell by 3.3% dragging all the other down figures with it to the 0.5% loss. Some are predicting that the next 3 month report will show a big increase as all the builders play catch up and fix all the new ice related damage.
Just interviewed someone that was meant to have "flawless PHP and MySQL" - his PHP was fairly strong but his only experience of SQL was simple login and logging systems - phrases like "outer join" and "subquery" seemed to confuse him greatly.
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
Are you even bothering to ask if they have a Wii?
You should rule out gullible fools.
You should rule out gullible fools.
Grim... wrote:
Just interviewed someone that was meant to have "flawless PHP and MySQL" - his PHP was fairly strong but his only experience of SQL was simple login and logging systems - phrases like "outer join" and "subquery" seemed to confuse him greatly.
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
Clearly you are interviewing morons.
Somewhat awesomely, the CAB just called me up asking if I was going to apply to be an advisor. I told them I was just filling the form in now and they should have it by tomorrow and the woman said she's pencil me in an interview for next week.
MaliA wrote:
UK "growth "figures have just been released - 0.5% contraction
Double-dip here we come.
Double-dip here we come.
MaliA - cool to hear about CAB ringing you up about a job. But now I'm going to have to deduct awesome points from you for copy-pasting someone else's post... You know where you got it. I know where you got it. Now apologise and go sit in the corner.
In other news, my brain exploded just over an hour ago when a cardiologist tried to explain the diagnosis and treatment of STEMI [ST-Elevated Myocardial Infarction] and NSTEMI [Non-ST-Elevated Mycocardial Infarction], it involved many ECGs and lots of drug names. I've got a feeling he didn't realise we were first years.
Zardoz wrote:
Are you even bothering to ask if they have a Wii?
No.
Grim... wrote:
Just interviewed someone that was meant to have "flawless PHP and MySQL" - his PHP was fairly strong but his only experience of SQL was simple login and logging systems - phrases like "outer join" and "subquery" seemed to confuse him greatly.
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
Got any jobs for someone with slightly better SQL skills experience, but no PHP? Have an MSc in computer science, but mostly unused. Happy to learn though! What's the salary?
(seriously!) Nice next door neighbour is burning stuff in a large tin in the back garden. Stinks, it does.
Bobbyaro wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Just interviewed someone that was meant to have "flawless PHP and MySQL" - his PHP was fairly strong but his only experience of SQL was simple login and logging systems - phrases like "outer join" and "subquery" seemed to confuse him greatly.
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
Got any jobs for someone with slightly better SQL skills experience, but no PHP? Have an MSc in computer science, but mostly unused. Happy to learn though! What's the salary?
(seriously!)Only £35, and no, sorry - I want someone better at PHP than I am.
Grim... wrote:
Bobbyaro wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Just interviewed someone that was meant to have "flawless PHP and MySQL" - his PHP was fairly strong but his only experience of SQL was simple login and logging systems - phrases like "outer join" and "subquery" seemed to confuse him greatly.
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
/glares at the recruiter
Also, he didn't have a 360 or a PS3 (count out of six so far is five PS3s and one 360).
Got any jobs for someone with slightly better SQL skills experience, but no PHP? Have an MSc in computer science, but mostly unused. Happy to learn though! What's the salary?
(seriously!)Only £35, and no, sorry - I want someone better at PHP than I am.
1) That's a pay rise!
2) Oh well!
3) What computing skills should I learn to make my self as employable as possible? I am getting well fucked off with my job.
Christ, that's a hard question. It honestly depends on what you want to do.
For instance, I'm only interested in people with PHP, but the guy next door might not be.
Java always seems to command good money.
£35 is a pay rise? We're offering £35,000! (Wait, no we're not, we're offering £30,000).
For instance, I'm only interested in people with PHP, but the guy next door might not be.
Java always seems to command good money.
£35 is a pay rise? We're offering £35,000! (Wait, no we're not, we're offering £30,000).
.Net, Java, Agile development practices, Ruby on Rails, PHP, some scripting languages... Take your pick!
What field do you want to work in, might help to narrow it down
What field do you want to work in, might help to narrow it down
Trooper wrote:
Agile development practices
Boo!
*wishes he'd kept up with the coding*
*would settle for £35*
Not sure what field to be honest, I enjoyed jsp web development at uni, but have forgotten most of it, and it has probably moved on a lot since then. In fact I rarely even here talk of jsp now, does it still exist?
Not really. Some systems will use it for legacy stuff, but I haven't heard anyone mention it in years.
If you're already good at SQL, DBA work pays well, especially on contract. I'd say you're better off going down that route than trying to turn yourself into a *spit* coder.
This is true. Get good at scalability and optimisation. Companies running large databases always get to the stage when all the care about is scale.
Note, not "good" at SQL, simply more knowledgeable than the person Grim... interviewed!
I agree, you'd probably have better luck getting a DBA contract for TOP MONIES than for being a coder. Although we're looking for Perl coders. Do you know Perl? We have free coffee and the office pays for the beers every now and then!
Squirt wrote:
Although we're looking for Perl coders. Do you know Perl?
<perks up>
£?
Free Beer??? How do I learn PERL?
First buy your sandals.
Bobbyaro wrote:
Note, not "good" at SQL, simply more knowledgeable than the person Grim... interviewed!
So you could bust out, er, a query with a subquery using "SOME" off the top of your head?
Or you know what a subquery is?
Or what?
Grim... wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Agile development practices
Boo!
Yay! You know it, crappy code boy
As a customer, agile dev shops are a massive pain in the arse to deal with. If you're releasing stuff to me more often than once a quarter, you're wasting too much of my fucking time.
A subquery is just a nested query isn't it? Or am I wrong, quite possibly I am. I also recognised that I had used (read about maybe) the term outer join before, but the specifics escape me right now, (something about unmatched tables?) . As I say, not good at SQL, I learned it on my MSc, but haven't used it since then. That is problem with the 1 yr MSc courses, they tell you so much info, but you don't get time to actually practise it.
Craster wrote:
As a customer, agile dev shops are a massive pain in the arse to deal with. If you're releasing stuff to me more often than once a quarter, you're wasting too much of my fucking time.
There is a huge difference between releasing because you can, and releasing because it's the right thing to do. Lots of place use "agile" to mean, we'll just do whatever the fuck it is we want and screw everyone else, which is precisely against the point.
I've always found "agile" to mean "meeting, meeting, meeting, meeting, WORK, meeting, meeting".
The theory of it is great, but I've never seen it in practise.
The theory of it is great, but I've never seen it in practise.
Back to people I'm interviewing, is it wrong to be suspicious of a dev that doesn't know how to fiddle with hardware?
To the extent where he wouldn't change his own RAM.
To the extent where he wouldn't change his own RAM.
Grim... wrote:
Squirt wrote:
Although we're looking for Perl coders. Do you know Perl?
<perks up>
£?
Our job advert says 35k - 47k, which is pretty decent, although not fantastic or anything. Although our job advert also says we're leaders in cloud computing, which is an utter lie, so I'm not sure what to believe.
Craster wrote:
First buy your sandals.
Pretty much. A beard, stupid hair and a collection of t-shirts with geeky slogans on them would also seem necessary, judging by my colleagues. An ability to stare at a screen that looks as if you've accidentally opened a jpeg in a text editor without going cross-eyed is a benefit.
Grim... wrote:
Back to people I'm interviewing, is it wrong to be suspicious of a dev that doesn't know how to fiddle with hardware?
To the extent where he wouldn't change his own RAM.
To the extent where he wouldn't change his own RAM.
Not if he passes your quizzes on the stuff that matters.
When you code stuff, do you start with a blank sheet, or do you have a library of things that does certain stuff, that you can build a program from?
When you code stuff, do you start with a blank sheet, or do you have a library of things that does certain stuff, that you can build a program from?
Are you having problems Mali? A lot of double posts today.
MaliA wrote:
When you code stuff, do you start with a blank sheet, or do you have a library of things that does certain stuff, that you can build a program from?
Depends, to be honest.
Some people like to go by hand, some people swear by frameworks. There's a graph somewhere showing the difference it can make, hang on...
MaliA wrote:
When you code stuff, do you start with a blank sheet, or do you have a library of things that does certain stuff, that you can build a program from?
There are huge amounts of libraries about, to the extent that you could do a lot of everyday stuff just by stitching existing libraries together.
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