|
Progress of sorts.
Things I have learnt today:
The best way to deal with the DWP is to treat it like a particularly brutal cross examination in court. Actually,court stuff is easier, as they expect it. When called, say "Good morning, my name is MaliA". Then, in one fluid movement and produce papers from your left and a notepad from your right, and say "To recap where we left off last week, and to bring you up to speed with the current situation..".
Then, explain the situation, referring to bits of the bundle, which you indicate with the pen you've obtained from some barristers' chambers. Move right through the brief history, before arriving at the part causing the problem. Here, drop your tempo ever-so slightly, but keep up the stream of facts, guidance and interpretations of it all. When you've done this, you move on to the real meat of the issue. The decision to freeze your cash funds and not giving you a reason.
Don't let statements like "The system is down, so I can't contact him" deter you. As you've come prepared. With the facts. And email addresses. You show them the email you sent to the letter writer. They realise you can contact them, they then know that this is not something that is going to go away. You are also writing down the odd little bit, or, at least, appearing to. This magically makes the computer system work again, and phone numbers begin to appear on a pad which is slid over to you. And people that "left the company a while back" are suddenly re-employed with an unbroken service record. You ask if they can give them a ring now, to sort it all out. They tell you that there's no phone. Point to the phone/fax machine behind them, but immediately ask if there is a postal address. This really, really panics them. They know that you know that they are lying to you. Don't ever say this to their face, though, save it, you've been making notes, haven't you? By now, they should be sweating a little bit. Time to strike harder and push the thin end of the wedge in.
Keep the pressure on, use the person's name ("I'm terrible sorry, is it Ms, or Mrs Smith?") to catch a breath and then ask them the same question again. Write something down. Then go back to the beginning, to summarise your points, and ask any questions you might have forgotten. Ask the advisor (it's Mrs Smith) what she would do. This then gets written down, shown to her and you ask, "You agree with this course of action?". She does. Of course she will. Repeat. Every question you ask, she will say yes to, and look more rattled. Your questions are all leading questions, and a simple "yes" will suffice, just write "yes" down. Show it to her and move on. A "moving on, now, Mrs Smith" in the correct tone lets you get away with this.
By the end of it, you'll have another phone number to call, and a woman worried about her conduct and answers. So you thank her, and say you'll be in touch. No money though, as that is still 'frozen' and she can't do much do anything from here. So go back about halfway through and start over.
So, in summary, no cash, one phone number, 2 A4 pages of notes which I've promised to type up and send back to her via email (she looked worried over that), a wish for a speedy resolution and a promise to copy her in to any further emails sent to the person in charge of the area, as this might prompt a quicker response.
Other pro tip, pinstriped suit, cufflinks, white shirt and a red tie make you look "like an asshole" according to MrsA, but I find that the apparel helps in the over effect, as they then think you're used to this sort of thing. Oh, and, as you leave, thank them for their time, and bid them a good day.
In other news, work was interesting today, I learnt the best way to deal with an offer to settle is "How much?....No, we formally reject that, goodbye".
_________________
Mr Chris wrote: MaliA isn't just the best thing on the internet - he's the best thing ever.
|
Register
Calendar
FAQ
Search
. We've got one for MrsP's nan and I'm now jealous 
