Bamba wrote:
Satsuma wrote:
Murder on the Orient Express ends with the possibility that there might be a sequel. Let’s fucking hope not, aye?
Yep:
http://variety.com/2017/film/news/murde ... 202620018/What's your beef with it? I quite enjoyed it actually.
The great lineup of stars! Yay! Hardly used. Nay!
Kenneth Branagh! Yay! Kenneth Branagh as Poirot. Nay. Kenneth Branagh directing Kenneth Branagh as Poirot. Nay nay. Some fucker should have been reining in his performance sounding occasionally like
the policeman from Allo Allo.
If
the majority of
the film takes place in one location and you build a bridge at least in part for one scene then why is there so much chuffing CGI for
the external shots?
Unfathomably and most heinously there’s no atmosphere and no tension in this murder mystery. When one character exclaims “I’m sleeping in here where I can see everyone” I yawned at
the prospect of a nice nap as I had no expectations that something thrilling or dangerous might happen. When Big P gives a gun to someone near
the end there’s zero tension and you’re just left with utter bemusement where this change of heart has come from. I doubt it’s
the fault of
the story which was alright but rather
the director. But he was probably wanking so hard over his portral of Poirot that his glasses fell off and he couldn’t see down
the lens. Take one scene where he spots some distinctive marking on a gun held by one character: He identifies
the lies he’s told instantly and tells
the character and
the audience, like a big smarty pants, about how he saw this and that on his gun. Does
the audience see
the gun in any meaningful way? Nope. There’s not even a single close up or, better still, something out of frame but large enough that
the observant might be in on
the terribly clever observation. Fuck that. We have a quick fire and lengthy spouting of cleverness that left me dumbfounded. It felt like
the laziest exposition in film. Show don’t tell. Or at very least show and then tell! And how does
the character with
the gun react to being called a liar? He folds and fucks off; even leaving his gun. There’s no tension that
the gun holding guy might have
the physical upper hand even if Poirot has
the mental one, and no display of cleverness to diffuse any tension that might result from being called a liar and potentially a murderer. Just no tension at all.